追杀胖老爹（2020）

美国♥军♥方愿意资助你们的工作
the United States military would like to procure your services.
让我知道你把事说出去的后果你知道吧
You know what happens if I hear you talked, right?
不知道
No.
我会杀了你妈妈
I'll kill your mommy.
我会杀了你♥爸♥爸
I'll kill your daddy.
你还有条狗
You got a dog?
是的
Yeah.
狗叫什么名字
What's your dog's name?
豆 豆子
J-Jo Jo Beans.
那我会把豆子也杀了
Well, I will kill old Jo Jo Beans too.
现在你走进去
Now you're gonna go in there
就说你逛街没注意时间
and say that you were at the mall and you lost track of time.
你去给他们买♥♥圣诞礼物了 记住了吗
You were buying them some Christmas presents. You got it?
可我没有什么圣诞礼
I don't have any Christmas pre...
那就说你本来想要
Well, maybe you were thinking about
给他们买♥♥圣诞礼物
buying them some Christmas presents.
记住了 后天晚上
Remember, two nights from now,
圣诞老人的大屁♥股♥会从你的烟囱里挤下来
Santa's gonna slide his fat ass down your chimney
然后给你一大堆礼物
and give you a whole bunch of presents
因为你今年一直是个乖孩子
'cause you've been such a good girl this year.
你知道 他不是对谁都这么好的
You know, he doesn't do that for everyone.
你的手♥机♥
Here's your phone.
克里斯汀
Christine.
圣诞快乐
Merry Christmas.
谢谢 亲爱的
Thanks, love.
你觉得他们说要关掉工厂是认真的吗
You think they're serious about shutting down the factory?
不 他们就是想威胁我们接受协议
Nah, they're just trying to bully us into a contract.
你确定吗
You sure about that?
我们也可以搞点额外收入的
We could use the extra income.
我知道
I'm aware.
不一定非得是他们的渠道
Doesn't have to come from them though.
确实
No.
对啊 何乐不为呢
Why, no, it doesn't.
还好我考虑过
I'm glad I thought of it.
我在平安夜还给你打电♥话♥
Well, I'm calling you on Christmas Eve,
12月24日
你应该知道我是认真的
so you know it's serious.
我觉着98年你那活我们干得挺好
I mean, I thought we did a great job for you back in '98.
我的团队手脚麻利
My team is fast.
你知道的质量也一流 是吧
And you know they do quality work, right?
这 不行
Well, no.
这价格我确实比不上
No, no, I can't beat that.
但是这么低的造价
But if you're getting it that cheap,
肯定得在某些地方偷工减料
you've gotta be sacrificing something somewhere.
太不幸了 李宁
I'm sorry to hear that, Lee Ning.
好的 生活愉快 再见
Yes, have a good day. Bye.
李宁 没戏了
Lee Ning, out.
埃隆 我是克里斯 有给我的活吗
Elon, this is Chris. What do you got for me?
从服务器到糖果盒 我都试过了
I bid on everything from mainframes to Pez dispensers.
Pez:皮礼士糖果,美国的一种卡♥通♥造型包装儿童水果糖
大家都生产外包了
Everybody's outsourcing.
他们让六岁的孩子光着脚工作十二个小时
They got six-year-olds pulling 12-hour shifts in bare feet
来换两根泡泡糖
for two sticks of bubble gum.
太不是人了
It's heartbreaking.
你累坏了
You're exhausted,
你还得一整夜送礼物呢
and you've got a long night of delivering gifts.
要不出发前再休息一会儿
Why don't you get some rest before you go out?
还剩了点时间
You still got a little bit of time.
我睡不着
I can't sleep.
整个计划一点用都没有
The whole damn operation is goin' tits up.
克里斯
Chris.
克里斯 货都装好可以出发了
Chris, the sleigh's packed and ready to go.
我马上就到
I'll be right there.
我看看
Let me see it.
等等 就快写完了
Hold on. I'm almost finished.
让我 直接把名单给我就行
Let me... Just give me the list.
你检查过了吗
Have you checked it?
来吧 没问题的
Come on. It's fine.
你为什么这个样子
Why are you being like this?
因为我没用
'Cause I failed.
你落东西了
You forgetting something?
这个就我替你保管吧
I'll keep hold of this for you.
别啊 外面零下十五度呢
Come on. It's 15 below out here.
那就喝热巧克力吧
Then have hot chocolate.
好吧
All right.
给圣诞老人
怎么样
How'd it go?
没死
I survived.
圣诞快乐 亲爱的
Merry Christmas, darling.
给圣诞老人
来自: 圣诞老人
送给: 比利
你捅了大娄子了 死胖子
You just messed up big time, fat man!
出发
Go!
牛逼 创项目记录了
Hot damn. That was a course record.
再来一次
Let's run it again.
我今早 打算 去我儿子家
I was, hoping to, get to my son's place
去看孙儿们拆礼物
and see the grandkids opening presents this morning.
你没有加班费吗
Are you not being compensated for your time?
有 有的 当然有
Y-yeah, yeah. Sure.
那是没给够吗
Well, is that not enough for you?
不是的 足够了
No, it is.
那就好
Good.
那我们就再来一次
Then let's run it again.
有事吗
Is there a problem?
我有个任务给你
I've got a job for you.
太好了
Good.
我想你会喜欢的
I think you're gonna like it.
正合你的口味
It complements that hobby of yours.
什么活儿
What's the job?
我想要你杀了圣诞老人
I'd like you to kill Santa Claus.
比利温拿
来真的
Really?
我知道他也让你失望了
I know he let you down too.
好吧
Well
这难度可不小
that's not gonna be easy.
如果你没兴趣的话 我也能找到别人
Well, if you're not interested, I'm sure I could find s...
不 我有兴趣
No, I'm interested.
我非常有兴趣
I'm very interested.
253.93美元
2020年11月11日逾期
已逾期
自2020年9月24日至2020年10月23日
您共用电360千瓦时
送给: 圣诞老人
来自: 克林格太太
Cringle是圣诞老人姓氏Kringle的英语变体
你好 我是戴维斯
Hello. Davis here.
早上好 我是克里斯
Good morning. This is Chris.
-克里斯 早上好 -我接受提议
- Chris, good morning. - I'll do the contract.
那太好了 太棒了
That's fantastic! That's great.
-是的 没错 -我们安排下见面
- Ye... Yeah. Yeah, well, yes. - Let's get together...
圣 圣诞快乐
Well, m-merry... merry Christmas.
唯一能睡懒觉的日子 你却起那么早
The one day you get to sleep in, and you're up early.
我心事重重啊
Well, I had a heavy mind.
我刚才同意合约了
I just agreed to the contract.
-我们只能这么做 亲爱的 -我知道
- It's what we have to do, love. - I know.
怎么了
What is it?
几个孩子拿着猎枪往天上乱射
Some kids with a deer rifle put some flak in the air.
-又来 -是啊
- Again? - Yeah.
雪橇上穿了两个洞 我挨了一枪
Put two holes in the sleigh, one in me.
袋子都破了
Even tore my bag.
别管袋子了 让我看看你的腰
Don't worry about the bag. Let me see your side.
我没事的 没什么
I'm all right. It's... It's fine, it's fine.
会正常愈合的
It'll heal in the usual way.
我不知道我哪儿做错了
I don't know what I'm doing wrong.
可能是到时候退休了吧
Maybe it's time I retired the coat.
你只是需要歇歇了