2021去死（2021）

太尴尬了 因为我跟我妈一起看
It was embarrassing because I was watching it with my mum
我觉得她根本就没做过这种事
and I don't think she's ever, you know, done it.
至少我希望没有 我不愿意去想
At least, I hope not. I don't like to think about it.
我刚想过了
Ugh. Just thought about it.
见到你真是太好了 丹柏莉夫人
It is so wonderful to see you, Lady Danbury.
这种话我听得多了
Words I do not hear often enough.
这部剧的卡司占据了各种头条
The show's casting grabs headlines,
因为有色人种扮演了英国贵族
with people of color playing members of the British aristocracy.
像我这样的人可以成为
It's great that someone who looks like me
黑斯廷斯的公爵夫人 这很振奋人心
could one day grow up to become Duchess of Hastings.
我一口气全追完了
I binged the whole thing in one go.
虽然回想一下 我或许应该好好研发疫苗
Although, in retrospect, I probably should have been working on the vaccine.
但一些白人特权人士 非常失望这部奢华的电视剧
But some privileged white men are disappointed the lavish show
并没有给白人特权人士 提供他们期待已久的解脱
doesn't give a much-needed break to privileged white men.
那部剧比去年的奥斯卡还恶劣
That program was worse than the statues last year.
多元文化主义在历史上根本就不正确
The multiculturalism is historically inaccurate.
其实 我借用一句流行语 这非常文化不恰当 不是吗？
In fact, to borrow a trendy phrase, it is cultural appropriation, is it not?
白人就这样从自己的历史上 被一笔划去了
At a stroke, the whites are erased from their own history.
那是幻想 不是历史
It's fantasy, not history.
那白人被从自己的幻想中抹去了
Well then the whites are erased from their own fantasy.
这样更恶劣 因为这什么时候是个头？
Which is worse, because where does that end?
今晚我睡觉的时候
Tonight, when I'm sleeping,
会在自己的梦里 被一个帅气的黑人演员取代吗？
am I to be replaced in my own dreams by a handsome black actor?
然后对着镜子专业又粗暴地自♥慰♥吗？
And then make rough but expert love to myself while watching in a mirror?
应该是这样吗？这是我想要的吗？
Is that what should happen? Is that what I want?
你希望这样吗？这是你想要的吗？
You want? Is that what you want?
虽然《布里杰顿家族》里的 贵族是色盲
But while Bridgerton's aristocracy is color-blind,
现实中的英国贵族可就不是了
real-life British nobility is anything but,
根据脱离皇室的哈里和梅根…
according to no-longer-royals Harry and Meghan
（《梅根与哈里奥普拉访谈录》）
…在一档引人入胜的电视访谈中所言
in a riveting TV interview.
梅根告诉我们 他们与你谈论了
Meghan shared with us that there was a conversation with you
阿奇的肤色
about Archie's skin tone. -Mm-hmm.
谈话的内容是什么？
What was that conversation?
我永远不会分享那次谈话的内容
That conversation I'm never going to share.
指责皇室种族歧视 这也太过分
Accusing the royal family of racism is outrageous.
其实… -不！我决不允许
Well-- -No, no, no! I will not have it.
你跟我说一件能反映 皇室可能种族歧视的事 说吧
You tell me one thing that implies that the royal family might be racist. Go on.
好 他们赖以存在的假设 是自己的血统
Okay. Their entire existence rests on the premise
天生就比其他人的尊贵
that their bloodline is inherently superior to that of other humans.
但他们本来就天生尊贵
But they are inherently superior.
他们拥有的一等基因只能是你靠
They have the kind of first-class genes that you can only get
坚持不懈 尽职尽责地 与自己的第二代表亲通婚获得
by consistently and dutifully marrying your second cousin.
还挺让人耳目一新的
I thought it was really refreshing
看到一名皇室成员接受电视采访
to see a member of the royal family sit down with a TV interviewer
而且还不是问 他们是不是恋童癖的问题
and it not all be questions about whether they're a pedophile.
采访披露了大量惊天动地的内情
The interview is packed with earth-shattering revelations.
我从未上网查过我丈夫 我觉得没那个必要
I've never looked up my husband online. I just didn't feel a need to
因为我需要知道的一切 他都会告诉我 对吧？
because everything that I needed to know he was sharing with me, right?
很难相信她没上网查过他
It's hard to believe she didn't google him.
拜托 你想知道自己附近 最好吃的塔可还要上网搜一下呢
I mean, come on, you do that just to find the best fucking tacos near you,
更别提丈夫了
never mind a husband.
“笨蛋王子”和“自我公爵夫人”出这种
This was the kind of ghastly spectacle that we've sadly come to expect
令人作呕的风头 其实在我们悲哀的意料之中
from Prince Woke and the Duchess of Me-Me-Me.
真正的皇室成员不会出风头
True royals do not make a spectacle of themselves.
瞧瞧女王
Look at the Queen.
她会跑来跑去喊着 “大家看我”吗？
Is she running around going, "Look at me, look at me"?
可她戴着王冠坐金马车出行
She travels in a golden carriage wearing a crown.
那不是炫耀 是排场
That is not showing off. That is pageantry.
传统的皇室排场
Traditional royal pageantry.
你更愿意怎样？
What would you prefer?
她不♥穿♥袜子 骑着一辆电动小摩托？
That she rides around on an electric scooter without any socks on?
她是女王 我认为她值得我们的尊敬
She is the Queen, and I believe she deserves our respect.
访谈过后 菲利普亲王 永远地从公众视线中退去
After the interview, Prince Philip withdraws from public life permanently,
他死了
by dying.
几百万人观看了
Millions watch the somber funeral
爱丁堡公爵菲利普亲王陛下 阴郁的葬礼
of his Royal Highness Prince Philip, the Duke of Deadinburgh.
显然 这对英国来说是个沉重的打击
Well, obviously, it was a huge blow to the nation.
从私人感情讲
And on a personal note, I shall miss him terribly.
我会深深想念他
你认识他吗？
Did you know him?
不认识
No, no.
但你见过他？
But you met him on occasion? -No.
他有着高贵的人品
He was a wonderful, wonderful character.
（菲利普亲王的长矛失言）
他因为种族敏感言论上过头条
He made headlines for racially insensitive comments.
他不是种族歧视者
He was not a racist.
他只是有着种族歧视幽默感
He simply had a racist sense of humor.
从理论上讲 海军军官菲利普 本可以葬在大海里
Naval Officer Philip could theoretically have been buried at sea.
但根据一部新纪录片的披露 海洋或许已经太满 不能再容纳他
But as a new documentary reveals, the sea is too full to take him.
那片子叫《渔业阴谋》 这很是奇怪
It was called Seaspiracy, which is odd,
因为我觉得海洋里 不就是阴暗漆黑的嘛
because I thought all piracy was in the seas.
《渔业阴谋》通过一系列 美丽生动的屏保图片
Seaspiracy explores the devastation caused by overfishing
和桌面背景 探究了过度捕捞造成的破坏
in a series of wonderfully vivid screen savers and desktop backgrounds.
我看到那片子的主题是鱼 就心想：“我超爱炸鱼…和薯条”
I saw it was all about fish and I thought, "I love fish… and chips."
对 真的 我很喜欢的
Yes, please. I love this.
所以我就看了 现在我没办法吃鱼了
So I watched it and now I can't eat fish anymore.
或者薯条 以免海豚的呼吸孔 被一颗土豆堵住了
Or chips. In case a dolphin gets killed by a potato stuck in its blowhole.
这年头只要看一部剧 能吃的东西就少一种
You can't watch anything these days without it putting you off something.
我看过《渔业阴谋》后 就吃不下金枪鱼了
I watched Seaspiracy, and now I can't eat tuna.
然后我看了《我的章鱼老师》 现在吃不下老师了
Then I watched My Octopus Teacher, and now I can't eat teachers.
每部纪录片都意味着 你能吃的东西少了一种
Every documentary means one less thing you can eat.
我根本不会冒险看《鱿鱼游戏》 因为我超爱吃乌贼
I'm not even going to risk Squid Game because I love calamari.
比《渔业阴谋》更让人丧气的是 因为疫情规定
Even bleaker than Seaspiracy, the 93rd Academy Awards,
第93届奥斯卡颁奖典礼 不仅凄惨地没什么看头
rendered poignantly unwatchable by COVID protocols
疫情式着装也让人不忍♥直视
and a pandemic-chic dress code.
奥斯卡奖得主是…
And the Oscar goes to…
（最佳纪录片）
《我的章鱼老师》
My Octopus Teacher.
太多元 但也太无聊了
So diverse, yet so boring.
我宁愿称之为“第一届唤醒奥斯卡”
You know, I would have called it "The First Woke Oscars,"
但大多数观众直接睡过去了
but most viewers slept through the whole thing.
改版后的颁奖典礼有很多创新
The new look ceremony features many innovations,
包括奥斯卡史上第一次
including, for the first time in Oscar history,
悼念那些今年被封♥杀♥的人
a moment of reflection for those who have been canceled this year.
（马特戴蒙 演员）
（贾斯汀汀布莱克 演员兼音乐人）
（JK罗琳 作家）
（克莉茜泰根 模特）
（苏斯博士 儿童文学家）
（艾米汉莫 演员）
（丹波 小飞象）
（吉娜卡拉诺 演员）
（蛋头先生 艺人兼蔬菜）
（希雅 音乐人）
（臭鼬佩佩 动画臭鼬）
明尼苏达州明尼阿波利斯
Minneapolis, Minnesota.
一次惊人的背离传统
In an astonishing break from tradition,
一名白人警官面对 杀害一名黑人平民的后果
a white police officer faces consequences for killing a black civilian.
（美国的灵魂接受审判）
（为乔治弗洛伊德讨回公道）
2020年乔治弗洛伊德的死 引发了全球抗♥议♥
The death in 2020 of George Floyd sparked intense global protest.
（黑人的命也是命）
所以杀死他的警♥察♥凶手德里克肖万
So the trial of his policeman killer, Derek Chauvin,
也被全球媒体纷纷报道
sparks intense global coverage.
我没办法呼吸
"I can't breathe."
法庭现场的报道显示德里克肖万
Coverage inside the courthouse shows Derek Chauvin
法庭外的新闻画面里则是一派欢呼
Outside, news reveals jubilation.
今晚 明尼阿波利斯法庭外的
Tonight, the crowd outside Cup Foods in Minneapolis
人群在得知德里克肖万
erupting in cheers as they learned
在乔治弗洛伊德一案中被定罪后 爆发出阵阵欢呼
of Derek Chauvin's conviction in George Floyd's death.
肖万的律师声称自己的当事人 应该获得缓刑
Chauvin's attorney argued his client should receive probation.
他无异于在说
He was basically saying,
“我们希望法庭斟酌
"We'd like the court to look into the possibility
引发真正内战的可能性”
of starting an actual civil war."
庭上电视显示肖万被带走时 几乎毫无反应
Court TV shows Chauvin barely reacts as he is led away.
作为刑罚的一部分 肖万被禁止拥有枪♥支♥
As part of his sentence, Chauvin was banned from owning firearms.
但他没有开枪杀死乔治弗洛伊德
But he didn't shoot George Floyd.
如果法庭真的想伸张正义
If the court really wanted justice,