But for me, I think, for me,
特别是你的聪明
It's your smartness more than anything else.
我的聪明 杰夫
My smartness, Jeff?
你醉了吗
Are you drunk?
你说话都不顾语法了
Because your grammar's starting to suffer.
可能吧
Perhaps.
我想 以你的观点来看
I suppose, from your point of view.
除了 稍微想一想
Except, think about it for a minute.
这种事会发生在一个
Would that possibility have even occurred to a-
一个没那么聪明的姑娘身上吗
a not-so-smart girl?
一个笨姑娘会去怀疑吗
Would a dumb girl have the sense to suspect that?
我想你是对的
I suppose you're right.
看吧
See?
看吧
See?
你证明了我的观点 我的想法
So you proved my point and that I mean what I say,
所以你不会回绝我吧
and you're not gonna blow it off as just something, you know-
我可没有说"来吧"之类的
some kind of come-on or something like that.
对吧
Right?
因为我不是那个意思
'Cause that's not what I'm doing.
去吧 去吧
Go ahead, go ahead.
我不用去 真的
I don't even have to go, really.
我只是
I'm just-
好的
Okay.
你知道
You know-
好的 杰夫 祝您晚上愉快
Okay, Jeff, well, have a good night.
祝您晚上愉快
Have a good night.
-再见 -晚安
- I'm sure I'll see you around. - Good night.
晚安 晚安
Good night. Good night.
现代女性
The modern woman has
关于应该想要什么
an unprecedented amount of contradictory stuff laid on her
关于众人所期待的行为
about what she's supposed to want
承受着数量空前的互相矛盾的要求
and how she's expected to conduct herself.
现代女性充满了矛盾
The modern woman's a mess of contradiction.
她们自己也给自己增加矛盾
And they lay it on themselves.
把她们变成了疯子
It drives 'em nuts.
就是因为这样
That's what makes it so difficult
才难以琢磨她们的需求
to know what they want.
对 这话说得没错
Yeah, you can say that again.
虽然困难但也并非无法攻克
Difficult but not impossible.
宝贝 求你
Baby, come on.
把门打开
Open the door.
求你 宝贝
Come on, baby.
让我进去
Let me in.
你好
Hey
你好吗
How you doin'?
宝贝 拜托
Baby, come on.
开门吧
Open the door.
什么
What?
别开玩笑了
Don't be ridiculous.
那是大楼管♥理♥员♥
That was the super.
女人
Women?
我爱♥女♥人♥
I love women.
真的
I really do.
我爱她们的一切
Oh, I love everything about them.
我也没法形容
I can't even describe it.
矮的 高的 胖的 瘦的
Short ones, tall ones, fat ones, thin,
从绝顶美艳的到极其平庸的
From drop-dead to plain.
对于我 所有女人都是美丽的
To me, hey, you know, all women are beautiful.
我无法自拔
I can't get enough of 'em.
我有一些死党是女人
Some of my best friends are women.
小时候 我看了很多电视节目
As a child, I watched a great deal of television.
我最爱看的节目是《家有仙妻》
And the show I most preferred to watch was bewitched.
作为一个孩子 看《家有仙妻》时
It was as a child, while watching bewitched.
我第一次感到了性♥欲♥
That I had my first erotic sensations.
59号♥对象
伊丽莎白·蒙哥马利
Elizabeth Montgomery
用她的手画了一个圈
would perform a circular motion with her hand
伴随着古筝或是竖琴声
accompanied by the sound of a zither or harp
产生了魔法效果
and produce a supernatural effect
所有的动作都停滞了
in which all motion ceased
所以其他的角色
and all the other characters
动作做了一半突然就冻住了
were suddenly frozen in mid-gesture.
所以也不奇怪
So it is of little wonder
在我的幻想中 会有超自然的力量
that my fantasy also involves supernatural powers
发生在我喜欢的女人身上
over the women of my choosing.
由于一些原因
For some reason,
我的幻想总在一家健身房♥里发生
my fantasy always takes place at a gym,
我妈热衷去的那家
the gym my mother religiously attended.
所以
So.
对了
Right.
在我的幻想里
In my fantasy,
我想象自己在激烈运动的人群之中寻找
I envision myself looking out across the floor of vigorous exercises.
我的视线落在
And my gaze falls upon
一个美丽 丰满 健美的女人身上
a beautiful, sensual, and athletic woman.
而她
And she,
从她健身器材中抬起头 看到我
looking up from her exercise equipment, sees me.
我只用眼神召唤她
I beckon her to me using only my eyes,
也许用一根手指轻轻画了个圈
or perhaps a slight circular motion with just one finger.
她 压抑不住她的性♥欲♥ 走向我
And she, overpowered with erotic attraction, comes towards me.
我们在房♥间正中♥央♥的软垫上会合
We meet on an exercise mat at the room's exact center,
她 在狂乱的性♥欲♥燥热中
she, removing the straps of her heavy clothing
除去了沉重衣服的束缚
in a frenzy of sexual mania
同时我则相对理智从容地
while my schoolboy's uniform is removed
脱下了我的校服
with a more controlled and amused deliberation,
强迫她在无法抑制的性♥欲♥中等待
forcing her to wait in an agony of erotic need.
然后 我用手上的强大力量停止了时间
And then there is copulation in varied and distinct ways
在凝固不动 但不可见的众人之中
among the many other petrified, unseeing figures,
我们以多种多样 各不相同的方式交娈
for whom I have stopped time with my hand's great power!
对了 莎拉
Yeah, Sara,
我刚好想说 我觉得你看上去很动人
by the way, I think you look fantastic.
谢谢你 哈利
Well, thank you, Harry.
我是真心的
No, it's true.
看起来 单身生活似乎让你
It seems that single life has just kind of
摆脱了羊毛衫小姐的名号♥
kicked the sweet little miss cardigan right out of you.
什么 不 不 我喜欢
What? No, no, I like it.
这种城市人装扮
This whole urban outfitters,
伊迪·赛德维克风格的东西很不错
Edie Sedgwick thing works, you know?
有点前卫 但又很独特
It's kind of, like, it's edgy, but it's distinctive.
那很棒
That's great.
那正是我所追求的
That's exactly what I was going for.
你看起来不错 莎拉
You look good, Sara.
-谢谢 山姆 -真的
- Thanks, Sam. - Really.
这样最好
Good for you.
谢谢
Thank you.
好了 我讲到哪了
Okay, all right, where was I?
大
Big.
对了 好
Oh, right, okay.
于是 我在和这个女孩约会
So, I'm out with this girl,
一个魁梧 硕大的男人 朝我们走过来
and this big, big guy, he comes over to us.
哪个女孩
Who was it?
尼奇
Nicki.
尼奇
Nicki?
不 是妮可
No, Nicole.
算了 随便吧
Okay, whatever.
他走过来然后说
So he comes over there and he says,
你们男人如今都一样
"you boys nowadays are all the same."
你说什么
"Excuse me?"
他说
He said,
你们这些八面玲珑的家伙成天晃来晃去
"all you smoothie type fellows go around thinking you are
认为自己是上苍赠予女性的礼物
the lord's own gift to the female species."
他是黑人吗
Was he black?
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