Yeah.
嗯
Yeah.
你知道吗?
You know what?
不会有白虎的,好吧
There isn't gonna be a white tiger, okay?
对,我根本没订
Yeah, I didn't book it.
知道为什么吗?因为它们已经灭绝了
You know why? Because they are extinct,
剩下的几只不想浪费时间
and the few left in this world don't want to spend the day
在你和你被宠坏的女儿身上
with you and your freaking spoiled daughter,
那你自己想想,好吗?
so figure that shit out on your own, okay?
你还知道吗?
And you know what else?
我们不是朋友,根本不是
We're not friends. No, we're not.
自从你在西雅图让我把你的脱衣舞服还给每一家二手衣物回收店的时候
We... We haven't been friends since you made me return your stripper gear
我们就不是朋友了,所以...
to every Buffalo Exchange in Seattle, so...
滚蛋,前朋友!
Fuck off, former friend!
哈喽!
Hello!
爸爸
Dad.
路上怎么样?
How was the drive?
你姐姐吓跑了一些犯罪团伙成员然后救了我的命
Well, your sister scared away some cartel members and saved my life.
哇哦
Whoa.
干得好,劳拉桑
Way to go, Laura-san.
猜猜我花了多少钱买♥♥这幅画
Guess how much I paid for this painting.
你说得对,它是免费的
You're right. It was free.
我朋友在狗狗公园的垃圾箱里找到的,
My friends found it in the dog park in a dumpster,
他们说,“乔乔会想要这个的”
and they were like, "Jojo will want this."
然后他们把它给了我,
And then they presented it to me,
我说“见鬼,是的,我喜欢”
and I was like,"Heck, yeah, I do."
谁不想要一幅感人的
Who wouldn't want a totally touching oil painting
关于一只狗妈妈帮她的小狗过河的油画?
of a mother dog helping her pup cross a stream?
很多人
A lot of people.
不管是谁扔的,是的
Well, whoever threw it away, yeah.
01:22:23,103 -- > 01:22:24,970
好吧
Well...
这不是华尔道夫酒店
This is not the Waldorf Astoria.
爸爸,在你评判你的新家前,
Okay, Dad, let me give you a tour
让我先带你参观一下,好吗?
before you judge your new home. Hmm?
好
Yeah.
好的,借过
Okay, so... Excuse me.
这里就是我每周做普拉提的地方
Over here, this is where I do my Pilates about once a week.
这是我喝咖啡的地方,真美味
And this is where I have my coffee. Delish.
哦,这是我的室友弗里茨,他也卖♥♥大♥麻♥,
Oh, this is my amazing roommate, Fritz, who also sells marijuana,
所以你们两个会有很多共同话题
so the two of you will have a lot to chat about.
爸爸桑
Papa-san.
不要
No.
这就是现在的家庭床
And this is what has now become the family bed.
谁会想到我们四个
Who would have thought the four of us,
和四条狗一起睡在家庭床上呢?
with four dogs, together in a family bed?
感觉好些了吗?
Does it get any better?
我当然希望如此
I sure hope so.
爸爸,别这样
Dad, come on.
你要占据她37平♥米♥的一半了
You're about to take up half of her 400 square feet.
她正努力往好的方面看
She's trying to look on the bright side.
我可看不到
Well, I'm not seeing it.
劳拉,我想我知道什么能让爸爸高兴起来
Laura, I think I might know what would cheer Dad up.
不行
No.
行
Yes, and yes, and yes.
不行
No.
行
And yes.
好了
Okay, okay, okay.
好了,爸爸
All right, Dad.
还记得那天晚上你在一场糟糕的超级碗赌中输了60000美元来消除一点刺痛吗?
Remember that night you lost $60,000
而我们做了一场表演
on a bad Super Bowl bet and we did a performance
来消除一点伤痛吗?
to take away the sting a little?
它没有消除
It didn't.
好吧,尽管当时
Well, even though back then
穿着内衣表演这个舞蹈是合适的
it was appropriate to perform the dance in our underwear...
不合适
It wasn't.
好吧,今晚,我们都穿好了衣服
Well, tonight, we are fully clothed.
准备好了吗?弗里茨
Ready, Fritz?
准备好了吗?灯光
Ready? Lights.
好的
Okay.
好吧,那真无聊
Well, that was underwhelming.
爸爸,什么能给你留下深刻印象?
Dad, what does it take to impress you?
我的意思是,我必须拯救生命还是治愈癌症?
I mean, do I have to save a life or cure cancer?
你想让我阻止一场现场强♥奸♥?
You want me to stop a live rape?
嗯,那会给我留下印象
Yeah, that would impress me.
我不是超级英雄,爸爸,好吗?
Well, I'm not a superhero, Dad, okay?
我只是一个普通的35岁的女人
I'm just a regular 35-year-old woman.
我要回我的房♥间了
I'm going to my room.
借过
Excuse me.
我们能找点吃的吗?
Can we get something to eat?
你怎么了?
What's wrong with you?
没事
Nothing.
感觉不像没事
Doesn't feel like nothing.
你载我穿越了全国只是为了摆脱我
Well, you drive me across the entire country just to get rid of me.
你是这么想的吗?我们要摆脱你?
Is that what you think? We're getting rid of you?
好吧,你最好把我送回另一个家
Well, you might as well check me back into another home.
你想来这里,是你选的地方
You wanted to be there. You chose that place.
这是我唯一的选择
It was my only option.
这不是你的唯一选择
It wasn't your only option.
我饿了
I'm hungry.
你本可以做出最小的努力,你本来可以和我们呆在一起的
You could have made the tiniest effort. You could have stayed with us.
你可以遵守一条小小的规则
You could have given me one tiny rule.
这是我唯一能做的保护自己的事情
That's literally the only thing I can do to protect myself.
危险来自什么?来自谁的?
From what? From whom?
我真的饿了
I'm really hungry.
来自你
From you.
哦,那么我现在是个连环杀手了?
Oh, so now I'm a serial killer?
不,你只是那个可以伤我最深的人
No, you're just the one who can hurt me the most.
我真♥他♥妈♥的饿了
I'm really fucking hungry!
说真的,伙计们,想清楚了
Seriously, guys, figure it out already.
我需要吃东西
I need to eat.
准备好点餐了吗?
Ready to order?
一样来一份
Yeah, we'll have one of everything.
全部?
Everything?
对,菜单上的每一道菜都来一份
Yeah, one order of every dish on the menu.
孩子要吃东西
The kid needs to eat.
“当麻烦到来时,它们不是单枪匹马,而是成群结队”
"When troubles come, they come not single spies, but in battalions."
噢,我的天哪
Oh, my gosh.
别太兴奋了
Don't get too excited.
多好的餐桌转盘
What a lazy Susan this one is.
菜单里有龙虾吗?
Was there lobster on the menu?
他走了
He's gone.
我知道了
I know.
他开走了车
He took the car.
他给你留下了这个
He left you this.
噢...
Oh...
怎么了?姐姐桑,过来
What's wrong? What's wrong? Sister-san, come here. Come on.
不要哭
Don't, don't, don't cry.
我一直都知道他不会留下的
I always knew he wasn't gonna stay.
我只是想看看你和亨利
I just thought I'd get to see you and Henry.
如果他是个混♥蛋♥,这就容易多了
This would be so much easier if he was an asshole.
你知道吗?他就 是个混♥蛋♥
Oh, you know what? He is.
感觉就像我们小时候一样糟糕
Feels just as shitty as when we were kids.
好吧,想想这对他是什么感觉
Well, think of how it feels for him.
他有两个好孩子,
Here he has two great kids,
超级成功、令人惊叹、才华横溢的舞者
super successful, amazing, brilliant dancers.
然而他却选择和别人的孩子在一起
And yet he chooses to spend time with other people's kids.
谁是别人的孩子?
Who are other people's kids?
其他人
Everybody else.
他给了你什么?
What'd he give you?
价值20000元的大♥麻♥
$20,000 worth of marijuana.
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