版税（2020）

版税
第一季 第一集
我们参加了这个超盛大牛逼的音乐业界派对
So we're at this big, fancy music industry party.
端着热狗给宾客吃
Schlepping hot dogs,
这时这个男人本尊上前问我们
when who comes up to us but the man himself.
正是神秘 传奇的
The myth, the legend...
雅各布·珠儿
Jacob Jewel.
-胡说 -没错 哥们
- Bullshit. - Yeah way, dude.
雅各布·珠儿 那个歌♥手
Jacob Jewel, the singer?
天籁之音雅各布·珠儿 没错
Jacob "voice of a goddamn angel" Jewel, yes!
他说什么
What did he say?
他说 "这他妈是什么汉堡"
He said, "What kind of fucked-up hamburger is this?"
你瞧 这家伙富到
See, the guy is so rich,
连普通人吃什么都不知道
he doesn't even know what normal people eat.
所以我们告诉他
So we tell him,
"那是热狗 哥们"
"that's a dog, dude."
结果他吐了我们一身
To which he spits it out all over us.
我们安慰了他之后
I mean, w-we calm him down,
向他保证里面的不是狗肉
we assure him it's not actually a dog.
他说 "谢天谢地
He goes, "Oh, thank God.
"因为我老婆养了四只博美
"'Cause my wife's got, like, four Pomeranians.
"要是我知道狗肉这么美味 以后我就
"I don't know if I could trust myself to be around them
"不敢待在它们身边了
"if I knew they tasted this good.
"因为这是...我这辈子吃过最美味的食物了
"'Cause this is... the greatest thing I've ever eaten.
是你们做的吗"
Did you guys make this?"
那我们该怎么说
And what were we supposed to say?
我们想让这个大咖喜欢我们 所以我们说
We wanted the guy to like us. So we go...
是的
Yeah.
我们还告诉他我们发明了热狗
We tell him we invented the hot dog.
"我们就在休息间隙抽空烤几个热狗
"We just grill up a few dogs when we're taking a break
平时我们是功成名就成功的词曲作者"
from being successful songwriters."
然后他说 "词曲作者
So he says, "Songwriters, huh?
"你知道吗
"Well, you know,
"我的唱片公♥司♥刚收到了一个劲爆的舞曲
"my label actually just picked up this big dance track
"作为我下一首单曲 但我超不喜欢
"for my next single, and I hate it.
"我想唱一首舒缓 经典的情歌♥
"What I really want is a nice, classic love song.
"如果你们的作品有这个热狗一半好
"And if you guys have stuff that's half as good as this dog,
那就把小样发来"
send us some tracks."
于是我告诉他 "我们的作品
So I tell him, "We've got stuff that's ten times
比那热狗好十倍"
as good as that hot dog."
莎拉大概不该在他满嘴热狗时
Sara probably shouldn't have said something
说这么令人震撼的话
so astounding while his mouth was full,
因为那家伙直接噎住了
'cause the guy just starts fucking choking.
莎拉马上说 "后退
And Sara's like, "Stand back!
-我知道怎么用海姆立克急救法" -我忍♥不住不撒谎
- I know the Heimlich!" - I could not stop lying.
于是我谷歌♥了海姆立克急救法 并给皮尔斯看
So I google "Heimlich," I show it to Pierce,
他开始大喊 "呼吸 呼吸 呼吸"
and he's shouting, "Breathe! Breathe! Breathe!"
突然有个家伙从人群中冒出来 说
And this guy comes out of the crowd, like,
"大家靠边站 我是医生"
"Everybody move aside. I am a doctor. "
我瞥了他一眼 "可不嘛 你是医生
I'm like, "Yeah, you're a doctor
我还是个功成名就的词曲作家呢"
and I'm a successful songwriter. "
不过他真的是个医生
But he was a doctor.
好消息是 雅各布挺过来了
And the good news is, Jacob made it.
更好的消息是 他现在知道我们是谁了
And the great news is he knows who we are now.
没错 那是因为他以为
I mean, sure, it's because he thinks
我们发明了热狗
we invented the hot dog,
但当你看到这样的机会时 一定得抓住
but when you see an opportunity, you take it.
不然你以为热狗是怎么发明出来的
How do you think the hot dog was actually invented?
有人有天看着一堆猪肠子
Somebody looked at a pile of pig guts one day,
并说 "我能用这个做好吃的"
and said, "I could work with this."
他想要一首情歌♥ 我们就给他一首
So he wants a love song. We're gonna give him one.
但问题是 他昨天就要了
But the thing is, he needs it, like, yesterday.
否则唱片公♥司♥就要用那首舞曲了
Otherwise the label's just gonna use that dance track.
你们有什么可以发给他的吗
So do you guys have anything to send him?
还没有 但是...
Not yet. But...
你知道多莉·帕顿写《乔琳》
did you know that Dolly Parton wrote "Jolene"
和《我将永远爱你》只用了一个下午吗
and "I Will Always Love You" in one aftemoon?
我们只需要写一首歌♥ 而且我们有两人
All we gotta do is half that, and we're two people.
好吧
Okay.
所以我们要进录音室里
So we're gonna go into the studio,
你要把我们锁起来 不让我们出来
you're gonna lock us in, and do not let us out
直到我们写出一首热门歌♥曲
until we have a hit song.
我是认真的 西奥
I mean it, Theo.
不能分心
No distractions.
一小时后
两小时后
三小时后
四小时后
五小时后
我放弃 我放弃
I give up. I give up.
我们什么也没写出来
We-we don't have anything.
已经好几个小时了 我们毫无成果
It's been hours, and we have nothing.
一个下午能写个屁
One aftemoon, my ass.
妈的多莉·帕顿 就是个骗子
Fuck Dolly Parton! She's full of shit.
好吧 我们不能放弃
Okay, we are not giving up.
我们不能想着自己被困在这个盒子里了
We just can't think when we're trapped inside this box.
问题就出在这里
That's-that's what it is.
我们在写关于爱情的歌♥
We are writing about love.
我们只需要走进世界
We just need to step out into the world
打开心门
and open up our hearts
迎接灵感 真理
to inspiration and truth
和美好
and beauty.
而且我饿了
And I'm hungry.
没错
Yeah.
西奥 你能放我们出去吗
Theo, can you let us out?
你让我别放你们出去
You told me not to.
但你没听到我刚才关于灵感的演讲吗
But didn't you just hear my speech about inspiration?
对 那一大段关于我们饿了的演讲
Yeah, and that whole thing about us being hungry.
拜托 想想你们能赚多少钱
Come on, guys. Think about all the money you could make.
至少我想的是这个
That's certainly what I'm thinking about.
我让你们用这个地方
I mean, I let you use this space and...
写你们的歌♥ 还几乎一分不收
produce all your songs for practically nothing.
说我自私吧 但是
Call me selflsh, but...
你好自私
You're selflsh.
这是个大好的机会
This is a big opportunity
我不会让你们被压力打败
and I'm not gonna let you choke under the pressure.
好吧 如果我不能离开
Okay, fine. If l can't leave,
我就从视频里获取一些灵感吧
I'm just gonna draw some inspiration from some videos.
我...我的手♥机♥呢
I-- Where's my phone?
不能分心 莎拉
No distractions, Sara.
好吧 你在翻推特
Okay, so you're scrolling through Twitter.
你看到了很多照片
And you're-you're seeing a lot of pictures.
你的亲戚刚结婚了
Your cousin just got married.
你看到了一张动图
You come across a GIF
是一只超级迷你的青蛙
of, uh, a tiny, small little frog--
比你 比你想象的还小
smaller than you-- than you'd imagine.
我说不好 我能想象一只很小的青蛙
I don't know. I can imagine a pretty small frog.
不不 不是那种青蛙
Oh, no, no, not like this frog.
这只青蛙非常迷你 就像它在十分钱硬币上
This frog's really tiny, like it's using a-a dime
就像在睡莲的叶子上
like a-- like it's a lily pad.
我喜欢
I like that one.
就是它了
We have a winner.
那就是我们的灵感
That's our inspiration.
一只小青蛙 在十分硬币上
A small frog, on a dime.
青蛙不是重点
Frog isn't the focus.
"在十分硬币上" 这是个俗语
"On a dime," that's a phrase.
对 比如 比如一次廉价的约会
Yes. Uh, uh, like, like a, like a cheap date.
比如"十分钱" 一首关于廉价约会的情歌♥
Like "on a dime." Like-like a love song about a cheap date.
不 你"变化无常" 我的心意骤然转变
No. You "turn on a dime." My heart turned on a dime.
*我的心意骤然转变*
*My heart turn-- turned on a dime*
*是时间*
*is time*
*你的爱是...*
*Your love is...*
好 这很好 我们有眉目了
Okay, no, this is good. We're getting somewhere.
这里有俗语的双关 有主题