奇迹缔造者

Miracle Workers S03E04

Part 2 Aug. 6, 2021, 10:21 p.m.

我的错蛇油不只能催情
My mistake. Snake oil is not merely an aphrodisiac,
还对脱发颇有效果
it's also quite good with hair loss.
我没这个困扰
Oh. I don't have that issue.
那你有什么背疼
Well, what do you got? Back pain?
-没有 -网球肘
- No. - Tennis elbow?
天花
The pox.
-目前还没 -大便带血
- No, not yet. - Burgundy stool.
-没有 -焦虑
- No. - Uh, anxiety?
我朋友确实刚跟我说
Oh, my friend did just tell me
我该放松放松
I could stand to loosen up a bit.
蛇油就是干这个的
That's what snake oil is for!
但别听我一面之辞
But don't take my word for it.
来试喝一口
Here. Try one of my samples.
你自己体验
See for yourself.
谢谢
Thank you.
挺好喝
Oh. Oh, that's good.
-没错 -还有余味
- Yeah. - Oh, it's got an aftertaste.
挺蛇的
Yeah, kinda snakey.
你只需要一点点
Now you only need a little bit.
一两滴就够了
Just one or two drops ought to do it. Mmm!
伙计别告诉我该怎么过我的人生
Hey, man. Don't tell me how to live my life.
该死这东西真不错
Shit, this stuff's great.
-你自己在这里没事吧 -没事
- Are you gonna be all right here? - Oh, yes.
我会盯着那些漂亮的瓶子给自己找乐子
I'll just amuse myself by looking at the pretty bottles.
好我要去找牌桌
All right, I'm gonna go find the poker table,
跟男人们一起耍耍钱
throw some cash around with the big boys.
祝我好运吧
Wish me luck.
服务员威士忌
Hey, barkeep. Whiskey.
所以我给
And so that is why
蒂华纳蔻琦扭涨了价
I raised the prices on the Tijuana Coochie Twist.
总算没白费姑娘们那动作值了
Finally, girl. That move is worth it.
打扰了
Um, excuse me.
你们是夜间女郎吗
Are you ladies women of the night?
这都1840年代了
It's the 1840s.
现在用的术语是"鸡"
The preferred term is whores.
抱歉无意冒犯你们...鸡
Oh, sorry. Didn't mean to offend you...whores.
我只是觉得你们做的事很棒
I just think what you do is so amazing.
听起来特别有异国风情
It's always sounded so exotic.
你想试试吗
Well, would you want to give it a try?
什么不可能
What? No!
我拜...真行吗
Me? Come--really?
来吧咱们给你找身行头
Come on, let's just get you into a dress.
有一套正好是你的尺寸
We have one exactly your size.
有个姑娘穿着它被捅死了
One of the girls was just stabbed to death in it.
我运气真好
Oh. Just my luck.
打扰了伙计们
Excuse me, boys.
我能加入吗
You mind if I join?
这游戏不适合绅士
This ain't no game for a gentleman.
我也许是绅士
I may be a gentleman,
但是...
but, uh...whew.
我这里这些朋友...
My friends here...
他们玩得可脏了
well, they play real dirty.
坐
Take a seat.
有意思
Interesting.
全押了
All in.
满贯
Full house.
操
Shit!
这...
That's...
好吧让我...
Okay. Let me just, um...
我现在打起精神了
Now I'm focused.
抱歉女士
I'm sorry, madam,
点鸡单也太扯了
this prostitution menu is ridiculous.
选项太多了
There's too many choices.
我记得你们以前只有
I remember when all you could order
两块钱的基本款
was a 2-buck pump and dump.
我也只需要基本款
And that was all you needed.
少年本尼
Benny the Teen.
仔细斟酌你的临终遗言
Choose your last words carefully,
因为这次你跑不了了
because this time, there'll be no escape.
这个我来保管
Whoopsie! I'll take that.
这里六点后禁止交火
This is a no-shooting establishment after 6:00.
你可以走的时候去寄存处拿
You can grab your gun from the valet on your way out.
非常感谢
Thank you so much!
帽子不错
Cute hat.
抱歉这什么鬼
I'm sorry, what the hell?
是吧这地方现在糟透了
I know! This place sucks now.
什么***
What the ?
马上就好再来点...
Almost done! And...
好了
Voila.
我的天我看着像个鸡
Oh, my God. I look like a whore.
我很喜欢
And I love it!
妹子你就像年轻版的贝茜·罗斯
Girl, you're like a young Betsy Ross,
不过是鸡版的
but like, a whore.
伙计们好啊有人预定了派对吗
Howdy, folks. Somebody order a party?
-布朗神父 -农民强恩很性感啊
- Reverend Brown? Farmer John! Looking sexy!
麦吉尔奶奶我们晚点再喝酒
Granny McGill, we are doing shots later
你跑不了的
and you're not getting out of it.
泽克是你吗
Zeke, is that you?
你的第一个客人来了
Your first client!
普鲁是你吗
Whoa, Prude! Is that you?
你觉得如何我从一个
What do you think? Just a little something
死鸡的衣柜里挑的
I picked up from a dead whore's closet.
你不是要守在马车边吗
Thought you were waiting in the wagon.
之前是的但后来
Hmm, well, yes, I was. But then,
我喝了点这种蛇油
I had a little bit of this snake oil,
我现在感觉棒极了
and now I'm feeling good.
布朗神父喝了蛇油
Reverend Brown gettin' down with snake oil?
耶稣会怎么想
What would Jesus think? Bleagh!
谁管他怎么想啊
Who cares what he thinks? Aah!
我这辈子都在遵守各种规则和限制
I've lived my whole life with all those rules and restrictions.
我一直是个呆瓜对吧
I've been such a dork, right?
是有一点对
I mean, yeah, a little. Yeah!
我想对全世界大喊
I just want to scream it out to the world--
以泽克欧神父是个大肥呆瓜
Reverend Ezekiel Brown is a big fat dork!
天快打住
Oh, my God! Stop.
-别停我喜欢 -你听到音乐了吗
- But don't. I love it. - You hearing that music?
是钢琴还是我的心
Is it coming from the piano or is it coming straight from my heart?
要跳舞吗
Do you want to dance?
不普鲁登斯我不想跳舞
No, Prudence, I don't want to dance.
我需要跳舞
I need to dance.
这地方到底怎么了
I mean, what the hell happened to this place?
以前可是随便哪天晚上来
Used to be you could come in any night of the week
都能看到三根手指的乔
and you'd find Three-Fingered Joe
在锁喉任何斜眼看了他的人
strangling anyone who looked at him sideways.
-还有脏老二鲍勃 -是吧
- Oh, Dirty Dick Bob. - Right?
把他的那根"你懂的"
Sticking his you-know-what
插♥进♥他目之所及的任何洞里
into whatever hole he could find.
现在的孩子都买♥♥那种
Kids these days are buying cowboy hats
已经有了现成弹孔的帽子
with bullet holes already in them.
-不是吧 -真的
- You're kidding! - No!
抱歉让二位久等了需要点什么
Sorry for that long wait. Now what can I get you?
我要牛排带血的
I'll have a steak, bloody.
-来两份 -抱歉
- Make that two. - Ooh, sorry.
我们已经不卖♥♥牛排了
We actually stopped carrying steak.
-不卖♥♥牛排 -但我们有牛排胡椒粉
- No steak? - We do have shishito peppers,
洒少许在奥尔加特奶酪上
that are lightly drizzled with Ortega cheese,
味道超级嗯嗯嗯
that are just absolutely mmm!
够了我受够了
All right, that's it. I've had enough!
这就是这个国家的症结所在
That's what's wrong with this country today!
人们把一切都弄得干净整洁
You make everything clean and nice