“您好 阿帕多王子
"Hello, Prince Apato.
您带来了什么嫁妆
What have you got-o?
我盼望着与你步入婚姻的
I look forward to marrying you...
殿堂”
...otto."
没人跟我说过要有所准备啊
No one told me we were supposed to prepare something!
我要为您献只舞
I prepared a dance.
我很欣赏你的勇气
I admire your bravery.
在我们国家 肌肉萎缩症是很常见的
Muscular dystrophy is very prevalent in my country.
再倒点香槟
More champagne.
先生 对不起 我想这是我的工作职责
Sorry, sir, but I believe that is my job.
啊 抱歉 但我才是王子的管家
Ah, apologies, but I am the prince's butler.
我来倒酒
I will pour.
深感抱歉 先生 但你身在
Deeply sorry, sir, but you are
百乐寇庄园
in Bellacourt Manor now,
而我才是这个庄园的管家
and I am the butler here.
万分抱歉
No, a thousand apologies,
但似乎王子的香槟杯一直空着
but it seems that the prince's flute has been left empty,
刚刚管家哪去了呢
so there is no butler.
大胆臣仆 出言不敬
I deplore the braying of the serving class.
你们两个 都给我退下
Both of you,out of my vision field.
殿下 可以告诉我
So tell me, Prince,
你觉得我家的闺女怎样呢
what do you think of my girls?
一个词概括
In one word?
迷人
Enchanting.
噢
Aww.
我都不知道在你们俩之中要挑选哪个
I cannot possibly choose between the two of you,
所以我决定和你们分别约会
so I will take each one of you on a date
看看谁更能让我动心
and see who charms me the most.
为真爱干杯
To true love.
敬婚姻契约
And binding contracts.
这里就是我们的厨房♥
And this is our kitchen,
大概稍微复杂高端一些
likely more sophisticated than you're used to
比起之前你们阿三做咖喱料理的位置来说
in the curried dustbowl that is the subcontinent.
弗洛保 先停一会儿
Flobelle, a moment.
我想向我们的客人展示
I want to show our guests
今天的晚餐
tonight's supper.
蒿雀
Ortolans.
这女仆是在干什么
What is this woman doing?
蒿雀一定要先用阿马尼亚克酒浸泡后
Ortolans must be drowned in a vat of armagnac
再烘烤的
and then baked.
老兄 你真是错的离谱了
You could not be more wrong,my good man.
不对 蒿雀必须
No, the core body temperature of the ortolan
恒温烹饪 这样它的内脏
must remain consistent so that the innards
才能粘腻却不粘牙
retain the right amount of viscous.
弗洛保 将蒿雀放进烤箱
Flobelle, put the birds in the oven.
- 是的 先生 - 弗洛保
- Yes, sir. - Flobelle.
不要将蒿雀放进烤箱
Do not put the birds in the oven.
你的管家手册是几几年出版的了
How old is your buttling manual?
烹饪手法在1♥8♥9♥8年的时候就被修改了
The preparation was amended in 1♥8♥9♥8.
这不可能
Well, that cannot possibly be true.
我参阅的都是与时俱进 经专家鉴定的文献
I'm up-to-date on all the peer-reviewed literature.
事实上 先生 他说得没错
Actually, sir, that's correct.
为将对人类和对禽类的待遇区分开
To avoid humane treatment of the bird,
在处理禽类时 要先浸泡在烤制 这样它会在
one must drown, then bake, so it dies in fear
命在旦夕的恐惧中死亡
of its impending death.
这样你才能品尝到恐惧的滋味
Thus you taste the fear.
而这种滋味是芳香扑鼻的
And fear is fragrant.
恐惧即是佳肴
Fear is food.
是的
Yes.
噢 这是胡说八道
Oh, this is absurd.
不对 这是一个比管家
No, this is a housemaid
技高一筹的女仆
out-buttling a butler.
还是一位美丽动人的女仆
A beautiful housemaid,at that.
谢谢
Thank you.
我希望你不要被我跟王子殿下对上眼后的
I hope you didn't get burned by all the sparks flying
激♥情♥火花给闪瞎了眼
when the prince and I first laid eyes on each other.
噢 我都没注意到
Oh, I didn't notice.
我希望你也没有注意到王子决定先带我
I hope you didn't notice that the prince is taking me
去约会
on the first date.
我倒还真没注意到
I also didn't notice too.
嗯
Hmm.
这是什么
What's that?
砒霜 嗯
Arsenic.Mmm.
为了我的王子 我要用上一小滴
Just a little drop will make me nice and pale
让我看起来更漂亮白皙
for my prince.
哼 为了我的王子 我要让我白皙的皮肤白的透光
Well, I'm gonna make my skin even lighter for the prince.
我要让我脸上的血管都清晰可见
I want every vein in my face to be visible.
莉莉安小姐 服用过量砒霜会导致
Lady Lillian, too much arsenic will make you...
弗洛保 如果要说男人喜欢什么的话
Flobelle, if there's one thing I know men love,
肯定是脸上能看见血管的女人
it's a veiny woman.
我这人本来就没有下限
I have literally no boundaries
没有自尊 当涉及到男人的时候
nor respect for myself, and when it comes to men,
我的饥渴程度会超过
I'm more desperate than a starving man
对一坨土豆泥流口水的人
in front of a pile of mashed potatoes.
打扰一下 老女佣
Excuse me, older nurse.
我到处在找你
I've been looking for you everywhere.
为什么找我
Why?
我的意思是 好吧
I mean, all right.
顺带一提 我们同龄
Also, we're the same age.
我不想问你这个
I hate to ask you this,
但是你可以告诉我
but do you think you could help me
我过去是一个怎样的人 或者说我是谁吗
find out who I was or who I am?
当然可以了 嗯哼
Of course.Mm-hmm.
反犬旁加一个句
D-O-G.
- 狗 狗 - 答对了
- Dog, dog. - Yes!
我不敢相信我在学识字
I can't believe I'm doing this.
噢 你做得太棒了
Oh, you're doing splendid.
为什么你要这么帮我
Why are you helping me like this?
这 你也知道 这是我的人生准则
Well, you know,it's my general rule
不要招惹杀人犯
to stay on the good side of a murderer.
再说 反正我要么教你识字
Plus, it's either teach you how to read
要么只能对着这本识字书自♥慰♥
or try to masturbate to this book on spelling,
而且这么撸还真有点困难
and it's a lot harder than you think.
- 准备好再读一遍吗 - 准备好了
- You ready to go again? - Yeah.
- 这次我不带着你读了 - 好的
- I'm not gonna spell it out. - All right.
哈米什
Hamish.
不是吧 兄弟 我们刚刚才拼过
No, man, we--we just did it.
这是“狗”
It's "dog."
天啦 上帝 认字蠢炸了
Oh, God, reading is so stupid.
字母就是几坨弯弯曲曲的大便
All letters are just squiggly pieces of shit.
别酱说嘛
Aw, come on.
嘿 嘿 嘿 嘿
Hey.Hey, hey, hey.
现在 我敢打赌你这辈子
Now, I bet your whole life,
总在听人家说你笨
people have been telling you you're stupid,
他们说得对
and they're right.
你是笨啊
You are stupid.
你 你蠢得要命
You-- you're very stupid.
什么 你想说什么啊
Where-- where are you going with this?
噢 不好意思
Oh, I'm sorry.
只要我一开始说 我就
Once I get going, it--
我想说的是
My point is,
你虽然说不上聪明
you're just smart enough
但也不算笨
to stop being stupid.
你对我好温柔哦
You're so tender with me.
我不和白人厮混
I don't play in the snow.
我是有原则的人
I set a boundary.
我需要你尊重我的原则
I'm gonna need you to respect it.
碧翠丝 可能我是疯了
Beatrice, maybe I'm crazy,
但是我真的能想象你为我生下一名男继承人的场景了
but I could really see you bearing me a male heir.
千万不要是女孩 拜托了
No girls, please.