等我先把杂♥志♥拿...
Let me just take the magazines...
...出来
...out.
哦 可真是... - 还没完呢
Oh, that is... Not over yet!
喔 老妈
Wow, Mom.
这画面可真壮观啊
That's a really harsh review of the spring line.
再见了 冰冻的雪人儿
Goodbye, freezing snowmen,
你好啊 火♥辣♥辣的孙女们
hello smoking-hot granddaughters.
他们的老妈身材也不赖噢
Their mothers aren't bad either!
噢 嘿
Oh, hey!
对了 说到热辣
By the way, speaking of hot,
记得要抹防晒霜 这边紫外线很强的
make sure you wear your sunblock. The sun here is brutal.
有节日专用的防晒霜吗
Do they make holiday sunblock?
就是里面是蛋酒味的不是椰奶味的
One that smells like eggnog instead of coconut?
你懂他在说什么吗
Do you know what he's talking about?
不知所云
Not at all.
他的大脑结构跟我们正常人不同
His brain works differently than ours do.
进来吧
Come on in.
孩子的房♥间在左边
Kiddie suite to the left.
左边 孩子的房♥间在左边
To the left, kiddie suite to the left.
别碰枕头薄荷糖
Don't touch the pillow mints.
那个是一会儿吃的
They're for later.
好的
All right.
你该知道 查莉到了调皮捣蛋的年龄了
You know, Charlie's at a pretty rambunctious age.
我是说 你 呃...
I mean, you, uh...
你这里有专门防止小孩乱碰吧 对吧
You did child proof the place, right?
当然 其他的东西都拿走了
Of course! Everything's been put away
除了圣诞的装饰品
except the Christmas decorations.
只要别让她接近矮装饰树
Just keep her away from the low-hanging tree ornaments.
还有我的古董圣诞装饰
And my antique nativity scene.
特别是圣诞麋鹿
And especially Santa's reindeer.
非常珍贵 这种造型的五十年前就停产了
It's priceless. They haven't made one like that in 50 years.
圣诞老人
Santa!
哦 不 不 不 不
Oh! No, no! No! No, no, no.
不 不 不 不
No! No, no, no, no.
你看能不能把这些都拿掉
Any chance we could put this stuff away?
别开玩笑了 告诉她别去碰就行了
Don't be ridiculous! Just tell her not to touch them.
你也有过孩子的 对吧
You did have kids once, right?
是的 但是我的孩子很乖
Yes. Ours were well-behaved
因为我知道怎么当好家长
because we knew how to parent them.
好吧
Okay.
嘿 老妈 你还好吧
Hey, Mom, you okay?
再好不过了 亲爱的...
Just peachy, sweetheart...
好吧 外面有人等了你一小时了
Okay, 'cause somebody's been waiting for over an hour.
你搞不好也不太想进去了
You probably wouldn't want to go in there anyway.
先等会儿
Hold the phone!
别让她靠近我的鸡
Keep her away from my chickens.
山里的味道真清爽
That mountain air is nice.
我们不要找医生吗
Shouldn't we be finding a doctor?
我没事 只是有点小晕车
I'm fine! I was just a little carsick.
这轻描淡写的好比把二战称为小分歧一样
That's like calling World War II just a little disagreement.
哦 瞧瞧你 历史课听得多好啊
Oh, look at you, staying awake during history class.
女士 真的很抱歉
Ma'am, I'm terribly sorry,
我不能让你上场了
but I can't let you back on the bus.
其他的旅客拒绝与你同行
The other passengers refuse to travel with you.
什么
What?
好吧 给我听着 你们
Okay. Listen, people,
你以为我一开始想上这破车吗
I didn't want to get on this stinking bus in the first place!
啊 你觉得有意思吗
Ah, you think that's funny?
妈妈 你最好当心点
Mom, you might want to be careful.
那只鸡已经摆好要攻击的架势了
The chickens are getting into their fighting position.
我觉得我妈妈想表达的是
So what I think my mom is trying to express
她觉得有点不公平 你们宁愿让一个
is it's a little bit unfair that you're letting
带鸡的男人坐车 也不让她坐
the chicken man on the bus, but not us.
是呀 可是鸡又没有弄得满车人恶心
Yeah, but the chickens aren't grossing everybody out.
好了 司机大哥 你给我听好了
Okay, bus jockey, here's how it's gonna go.
你得让我们继续搭这辆
You are going to let us on this
豪华大巴 不然就有你好看的了
luxury motor coach or it is going to get ugly.
就让它走吧 女士
Just let it go, ma'am.
最后一次声明 我没有打人
For the last time, I didn't hit anybody.
是呀 我知道 你只是在用肢体表示愤怒
Yeah, I know. You were just gesturing for emphasis.
这附近有没有火车站
Is there a train station around here?
哦 有的 历史协会经营着的
Oh, yeah, sure. Historical society runs it.
当然 自从1800年就
Of course, there hasn't been
没有通过真正的火车了
an actual train there since the late 1800s.
巴彻·卡斯迪曾经劫道过一次
Butch Cassidy robbed it once!
哦 那有租车的地方吗
Oh. How about a rental car place?
可以去伦尼那里瞧瞧 就在山上八英里处
Maybe try Lenny's. Just up the hill about eight miles.
我也想带你们过去 可是车流高峰期要到了
I'd take you there myself, but rush hour's starting
我得去开交通指示灯
and someone's gotta turn on the traffic light.
不过不用担心 你们现在走路出发的话
But don't worry, you start walking now,
日落前就能到那里了
you'll make it there by sundown.
我们要错过圣诞节了
We're gonna miss Christmas.
不会 不会 妈妈 不会的 八英里而已啦
No, no, Mom. No, we're not! It's just eight miles!
然后 还有个800英里
And then, like, another 800.
如果你还这样边哭边走的话
Going to be after sundown
估计太阳下山也到不了咯
if you can't walk and cry at the same time.
你能有点同情心吗 长官
How about you show a little compassion, mister?
走吧 - 哦 太讨厌了
Come on. Oh, this stinks!
谁说我就不能边走边哭了 哭给你看
Who says I can't walk and cry at the same time. You watch me!
我打赌你老爸正温暖舒服着
I bet your father's warm and dry,
搞不好跟孩子们一起缩在沙发上
and probably snuggled up on the couch with the kids,
看着温馨的圣诞小影片呢
watching a sweet, little Christmas movie.
噢
Oh!
不
No!
不 不 不 不
No! No! No! No!
不 不
No! No!
不要 不要 不要
No, no, no, no. No, no, no, no.
鲍勃
Bob!
你拿我的驯鹿干嘛
What are you doing with my reindeer?
坏爸爸
Bad Daddy.
好孩子 查莉 至少她知道怎么乖乖的
Good girl, Charlie. At least someone knows how to behave.
嘿 你 干嘛无精打采的
Hey, there! Why the glum look?
给 吃颗薄荷糖
Here, have a mint.
谢啦 外公
Thanks, Grandpa.
我只是有点郁闷
I'm just all ripped up inside.
我今天失去了我最好的朋友
I lost my best friend today.
哦 真抱歉 孩子
Oh, I'm so sorry, kiddo.
哦 他叫什么名字
Oh! What was his name?
Z系列豪华家庭游戏机
Z-Station Deluxe Home Gaming System.
哦 搞什嘛 那个我家有啊
Oh. Heck, I got one of those.
什么
What?
哦 你是本世纪最拉风的外公了
Oh, you're the greatest grandpa in the history of grandpas!
你都有什么游戏
So what games do you have?
高尔夫
Golf.
还有呢
And?
还用得着别的吗
What more would I need?
哦 外公 放下你的球杆
Oh, Grandpa, put down your putter.
体验外面全新的世界吧
There's a whole other world out there.
请允许我隆重为您介绍查克·杰布罗斯基的巨柱
Allow me to introduce you to the work of Chuck Jablowsky,
人类史上最赞的游戏开♥发♥者
one of the greatest video game designers in human history.
死亡星系二
"Galaxy of Death Two"?
那玩意儿跟高尔夫有什么关系
What's that got to do with golf?
半点关系都没有
Absolutely nothing.
洛基山脉 3:54 PM 圣诞倒数38小时
妈妈 如果你哭的声音再响一点 恐怕就要雪崩了
Mom, if you cry any louder you'll trigger an avalanche.
已经到了平安夜了 泰迪
It's Christmas Eve eve, Teddy.
我只是想和我的宝宝呆在一起
I want to be with my baby.
当然还有其他的孩子
And my other babies.
以及我老公那个大宝宝
And my big daddy baby.
妈妈 我们可以赶到的
Mom, I will get us there!
我保证 但是您一定得先冷静下来
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