犯罪现场清理员（2021）

I never sent Jamie letters, Wicky.
这些不是你写的信
These aren't your letters.
不是我写的
They're not my letters.
那写这些信的人肯定是...
So these would have been written by someone to...
寄给我丈夫的 对
To my husband, yeah.
那个她就是...
That's what the, uh...
指的是你
Meant you.
真是个傻♥逼♥
What a knobhead.
她是说贝瑟曼
She means Besserman.
"杰 我们相遇前我在做什么
"Oh, Jay, what did I do before we met?
"你为我开♥苞♥" 希望不是在我的厕所里
"You deflowered me." I hope it wasn't in my bathroom.
她回来了 对
There she goes, yeah.
"当你与我做♥爱♥
"When you make love to me,
我知道自己从未被抚摸过"
"I know that I've never been touched before."
-什么 -胡扯
- What? - Bullshit.
杰 他讨厌别人叫他杰
Jay? He hated being called Jay.
这么用省字符不对 你看
That is not a proper use of an apostrophe. Look.
谁管她的逼叫噗叽
Who calls her snatch a pooky?
杰米·贝瑟曼
Jamie Besserman.
他的头有这么大
This is the size of his head.
这就是我对你情人肉♥棍♥的看法 噗叽
This is what I think of your pooh sticks, Pooky.
反正他床上功夫也很差
He was shit in bed anyway.
真遗憾 玛吉
Ah, I'm so sorry, Mags.
没关系
It's ok.
你知道吗
Do you know what?
我觉得自己一直知道他在出轨 说不好
I think I always knew he was cheating, really. I don't know.
对 他肯定在这里偷偷见她
Yeah. He must have been meeting her here
很多年了 对吧
for years, then, was he?
对 出差
Yeah, on business trips.
思考新主意 对吧 一个人
Brainstorming new ideas, eh? Alone.
真混♥蛋♥ 还在我们的度假屋
What a bastard. In our holiday home, too.
我猜你肯定希望自己去了那次生日会 对吧
Bet you wish you'd come to that birthday party now, eh?
又来了
Oh, here we go.
你错过了一次精彩的派对
You missed a great party...
同时还有一个忠诚的生活伴侣
..forward slash, faithful life partner.
我一直在等你 知道吗
I was waiting for you, you know.
在酒吧大笑一通
Had such a bloody laugh down the pub.
然后其他小子组织了狂欢
Then the boys had organised that rave.
我感到无比自♥由♥
I felt so stupidly free...
但我在找你
..but I was looking for you.
而你一直没来
And you just never came.
玛吉
Maggie!
我知道
I know.
你是我在那里唯一想见的人
You were the only one I wanted there.
我现在来了
I'm here now.
-好 脱裤子 躺下 -什么意思
- Right, trousers off, lie down. - What do you mean?
拜托 维基 我们都知道只能用这种体♥位♥
Come on, Wicky. We both know it only works one way for us.
我们才不是只有一种体♥位♥
It does not only work one way for us.
你看着吧
You just watch.
好 这样差点就可以了
There you go - this would nearly work.
差点 没错
Nearly, yeah.
那你踮起脚来
Well, go up on your tiptoes.
这样会伤到我的脚
That's going to hurt my feet.
好吧 老奶奶
All right, Nana.
-你可以趴在这些上面 -你不能把我架起来
- You could get on these. - You're not jacking me up.
我才不是车
I'm not a bloody car.
这是什么
What's this?
去网上查 这是青蛙式
Just looked it up online. It's froggy style.
-谁是青蛙 -我是青蛙
- Who's the frog? - I'm the frog!
你还好吗
Oh, you all right?
瞧 这样怎么不行了
There, what's wrong with this?
你能这样坚持多久
How long can you keep that up?
-你的上肢没有力量 亲爱的 -也对
- You've got no upper-body strength, love. - Yeah.
耶
Yay!
不过这样比性♥爱♥要好
Oh, this is better than sex anyway.
吸我的脚趾头
Suck my toe.
别搞怪了
Stop being weird.
你的下腰还有毛病吗
You still get lower-back problems?
-对 会抽点痉 -嗯
- Yeah, it does spasm a bit, yeah. - Yeah.
把我放下
Put me down.
好
Yeah.
也许确实不行
Maybe it didn't work.
我跟你说了
I told you.
你瞧
See?
就跟从前一样
Just like the old days.
就跟从前一样
Just like the old days.
-躺好了 -抱歉
- Stay still. - Sorry.
我也要证明一个观点
I've got a point to prove too.
你打算怎么办
What are you going to do?
回家参加我儿子的生日
Go home for my son's birthday.
-真的吗 -对
- Really? - Yeah.
他的生日我得出席
I have to be there for his birthday.
你懂的 毕竟你是他爸爸
You understand that, being his dad.
那贝瑟曼呢 你要原谅他吗
What about Besserman? Are you going to forgive him?
你觉得呢
What do you think?
怎么了
What?
没什么
Nothing.
我认得这表情 说说你的想法
I know that face. Say what's on your mind.
挺好笑的 是吧
It's funny, isn't it?
这么多年来我一直想着
I've thought loads over the years
自己要对你说什么
about what I'd say to you,
但现在你在这里 我却无语了
but, now you're here, I haven't got a voice.
他会怎么说
Well, what would he say?
谁
Who?
当然是传奇人物 鲍勃·泰勒
The legend, of course. Bob Taylor.
我拆 简单来嗦
Well, I shupposhe, fundamentally shpeaking,
如果要我说死话
if I wash being honesht,
如果要我嗦 从我类心深处...
if I was shpeaking, if I may, from the shentre of my shoul...
有话快说 鲍勃
Get on with it, Bob.
痣从你离开
..that shince you left...
我就一直在等你
..I have been waiting for you...
过去的每个生日
..and that with every birthday that passes,
我都想这次是否
I wonder if, this time...
你会回来
..you'll come back.
维基
Oh, Wicky.
我得走了
I have to go.
他个头不大 对吧 贝瑟曼
He's not a big man, is he, Besserman?
对 因为他才是身材古怪的人
Yeah, cos he's the freaky-size one.
-那你走了 -对
- Off, then? - Yeah.
很好 听着 我也有事要干
Good. Listen, I've got stuff to do.
-反正我还得烟熏整个屋子 -当然 对
- I've got to fumigate the place anyway... - Of course, yeah, yeah.
那你好好干 对吧
So, yeah, do a good job, innit?
我猜
I guess, uh...
谁都说不好 我们是否会
..we'll never know, then, will we,
不知道会发生什么
you know, what would have happened
如果你去了那次生日会的话
if you'd turned up to the birthday?
我想我们知道 很多个在白马酒吧的夜晚
I think we do, yeah. Loads of nights in the White Horse
看着别人喝自己的尿
watching a man drink his own piss.
你不能回到他身边
You can't go back to him.
我不会回到他身边 维基
I'm not going back to him, Wicky.
很好 那就好
Well, good. That's good.
你为了错误的男人离开我
You left me for the wrong bloke.
我不是为了杰米离开你
I didn't leave you for Jamie.
或因为你奇葩的朋友
Or because of your weird friends.
或因为任何你的阴谋论
Or because of any other conspiracy theory.
-好吧 那我就收拾 然后我... -不
- Right, OK, so I'll pack and I'll... - No.
我们快乐过 维基
We had our time, Wicky,
而且那也是段很美好的时光
and a bloody good time it was, too,
但那不够
but it just wasn't enough.
现在对你来说足够了吗
Is it enough for you any more?
快乐星期一也不会永远