当哈利遇到莎莉（1989）

不 你没有
No you didn't.
谢尔顿可以帮你处理收入所得税单
A Sheldon can do your income taxes.
如果你需要做牙根管手术 找谢尔顿没错
If you need a root canal, Sheldon's your man,
但做♥爱♥不是谢尔顿的强项
but humping and pumping is not Sheldon's strong suit.
是他名字的原因
It's the name.
"蹂躏我吧 谢尔顿 你就是头野兽 谢尔顿
"Do it to me, Sheldon, you're an animal, Sheldon,
在我身上驰骋吧 谢尔顿"
Ride me big Sheldon."
听着就不行
Doesn't work.
你们要点些什么
What can I get you?
我要一份三号♥餐
I'll have the number three.
我要一份主厨沙拉 谢谢
I'd like the chef salad, please,
沙拉油和醋要放在旁边
with the oil and vinegar on the side
还要一份浇了冰淇淋的苹果派
and the apple pie a la mode.
主厨沙拉和浇冰淇淋的苹果派
Chef and apple a la mode.
把派烤热一点
But I'd like the pie heated
不要把冰淇淋浇在派上 要浇在旁边
and I don't want the ice cream on top, I want it on the side
如果有的话 我想要草莓味的冰淇淋
and I'd like strawberry instead of vanilla if you have it.
如果没有 那就不要冰淇淋 只要奶油
If not, then no ice cream just whipped cream
但必须得是现做的 如果是罐装奶油就什么也不要了
but only if it's real, if it's out of a can then nothing.
连派也不要了吗
Not even the pie?
不 只要一份没有烤热的派
No, just the pie but then not heated.
怎么了
What?
没事 没事
Nothing, nothing.
你怎么会和谢尔顿分手
So, how come you broke up with Sheldon?
你怎么知道我们分手了
How do you know we broke up?
因为如果你们没分手
Because if you didn't break up,
你就不会和我在一起了
you wouldn't be here with me.
和你在一起的将会是大屌♥谢尔顿
You'd be off with Sheldon the wonder-schlong.
首先 我没有和你"在一起"
First of all, I am not "With" You,
其次 我们分手的理由和你没关系
and second of all, it is none of your business why we broke up.
没错 你说得对
You're right, you're right.
反正我也不想知道
I don't wanna know.
如果你非得知道的话
Well if you must know,
是因为他这人太爱吃醋了
it was because he was very jealous
还有就是我会穿星期内♥裤♥
and I had these days-of-the-week underpants.
不好意思 这我得好好弄清楚
I'm sorry, I need a judge's ruling on this.
"星期内♥裤♥"
"Days-of-week underpants."
没错
Yes.
上面印了一星期对应的天数
They had the days of the week on them
我觉得还挺有意思的
and I thought they were sort of funny.
有一天 谢尔顿对我说
And then one day, Sheldon says to me,
"你从不♥穿♥周日内♥裤♥"
"You never wear Sunday."
他开始多疑 "周日内♥裤♥去哪儿了"
It's all suspicious, "Where was Sunday?
"周日内♥裤♥被我丢到哪儿去了"
"Where had I left Sunday?"
我告诉了他 但他不相信我
And I told him and he didn't believe me.
你说什么了
What?
根本就没有周日内♥裤♥
They don't make Sunday.
为什么
Why not?
因为上帝
Because of God.
好的 我餐费的15%
Okay, so 15 percent of my share
是九十美分
is 90.
六块九
6.90.
就留七块吧
This leaves seven.
怎么了
What?
我脸上有东西吗
Do I have something on my face?
你很漂亮
You're a very attractive person.
谢谢
Thank you.
阿曼达从没说过你很漂亮
Amanda never said how attractive you were.
也许她不认为我长得漂亮
Well may be she doesn't think I'm attractive.
我觉得这和个人看法无关
I don't think it's a matter of opinion.
你本来就很漂亮
Empirically, you are attractive.
阿曼达是我朋友
Amanda is my friend.
所以呢
So?
你和她在一起了
So, you're going with her.
所以呢
So?
你在勾搭我
So you're coming on to me.
不 我没有
No I wasn't.
怎么了
What?
难道男人夸女人漂亮
Can't a man say a woman is attractive
就一定是在勾搭她吗
without it being a come-on?
好吧 好吧
All right, all right.
单纯为了讨论清楚 这么说吧
Let's just say, just for the sake of argument,
我刚刚不是在勾搭你
that it was a come-on.
你想让我怎么样
What do you want me to do about it?
我收回那句话 好吗
I take it back, okay?
我收回那句话
I take it back.
收回不了
You can't take it back.
为什么不能
Why not?
因为你已经说出来了
Because it's already out there.
天哪 那我们该怎么办
Oh geez, what are we suppose to do?
报♥警♥吧 话已经说出口了
Call the cops, it's already out there.
随它去吧
Just let it lie.
好吗
Okay?
好 随它去吧
Great, let it lie.
这就是我的风格
That's my policy.
我总是这么说 "随它去吧"
That's what I always say, "Let it lie."
想在汽车旅馆过夜吗
Wanna spend the night at a motel?
看到了吗
See what I did?
-我没有随它去 -哈利
- I didn't let it lie. - Harry.
我说过我会随它去 但我没有
I said I would and then I didn't.
-哈利 -我做的恰恰相反
- Harry. - I went the other way.
-哈利 -怎么了
- Harry? - What?
我们只会是朋友 好吗
We are just going to be friends, okay?
好 当朋友
Great, friends.
朋友最好了
It's the best thing.
当然 你也应该能想到 我们永远做不成朋友
You realize, of course, that we can never be friends.
为什么
Why not?
我的意思是
What I'm saying is,
事先声明 我没有任何勾搭你的意思
and this is not a come-on in any way, shape or form,
男人和女人永远做不了朋友
is that men and women can't be friends
因为这中间总是会牵扯到性
because the sex part always gets in the way.
才不是这样
That's not true.
我有不少男性朋友
I have a number of men friends
我们之间的关系根本没有牵扯到性
and there's is no sex involved.
-不 你没有 -我有
- No you don't. - Yes I do.
-不 你没有 -我有
- No you don't. - Yes I do.
只是你自己这么认为而已
You only think you do.
你的意思是
You're saying
我在自己不知道的情况下和他们做过爱吗
I'm having sex with these men without my knowledge?
不 我的意思是 他们都想和你做♥爱♥
No, what I'm saying is they all want to have sex with you.
-才不是 -就是的
- They do not. - Do too.
-才不是 -就是的
- They do not. - Do too.
你怎么知道
How do you know?
因为男人无法和自己觉得漂亮的女人做朋友
Because no man can be friends with a woman that he finds attractive.
他总是会想和她做♥爱♥
He always wants to have sex with her.
所以你的意思是
So you're saying that
男人可以和自己觉得不漂亮的女人做朋友
a man can be friends with a woman he finds unattractive.
不 他大概也会想和她们上♥床♥的
No, you pretty much wanna nail 'em too.
如果那些女人不想和你们男人做♥爱♥呢
What if they don't wanna have sex with you?
无所谓
Doesn't matter,
因为这已经牵扯到性了
because the sex thing is already out there,
这段友谊注定会结束
so the friendship is ultimately doomed
就是这么回事
and that is the end of the story.
我想我们做不成朋友了
Well I guess we're not gonna be friends then.
我想是的
Guess not.
真可惜
That's too bad.
你是我在纽约唯一认识的人
You were the only person that I knew in New York.
谢谢你让我搭车
Thanks for the ride.
没事 这一路挺有意思的
Yeah, it was interesting.
很高兴认识你
It was nice knowing you.