四十岁的老处男（2005）

[歌♥名A Life Of Illusion]
四十岁的老处♥男♥
嘿, Andy! 什么事, 伙计?
Hey, Andy!What's up, dude?
嘿, Joe. 嘿, Sara. 你们好吗?
Hey, Joe. Hey, Sara.How you doing?
你什么时候买♥♥车啊?
When you going to get a car?
嘿,你为什么不买♥♥车啊? 我买♥♥不起
Hey, why don't you get a car?- I can't afford it.
那么, 明晚幸存者游戏我们见了? 回头见
So, Survivor tomorrow night. We on?- See you then.
我会带苏打水 嘿，好好品尝你的橘子吧
I'll bring a soda.Hey, enjoy your orange.
好, 保重. 回见
Okay, take care.- See you. Bye-bye.
这家伙需要性生活 和我说一些我不知道的
That guy needs to get laid.- Tell me something I don't know.
早晨好
Good morning.
抱歉 对不起
Excuse me. Pardon me.
对不起
Sorry.
借过 谢谢
Excuse me.Thank you.
早安 嘿
Good morning.- Hey.
早晨好, Paula
Andy- Good morning, Paula.- Andy.
请问 请教一个问题
Excuse me.I have a question.
Hi8和数字录像带有什么区别?
What is the difference betweenHi8 and Digital video tapes?
我不是销♥售♥人员 所以我可能...
I'm not a salesman,so, I could probably...
欢迎光临Smart Tech 有什么需要帮忙的?
Welcome to Smart Tech.How can I be of service to you?
恩, 我就是想知道...
Well, I was just wondering...
这两个有什么区别?
what is the difference between these?
恩, 如果我要录像的效果 像你一样逼真的化...
Well, if I'm photographingsomeone as fine as yourself...
我会选择数字带
I'd probably go Digital.
嘿, 别担心
# Hey, don't worryI've been lied to #
哦，上帝 对不起，我来晚了,伙计 没关系
My God. Sorry I'm late, man.- No problem.
哦，哥们
Oh, man.
我周末玩得很爽 是吗?
I had a weekend.- Yeah?
我们去了墨西哥的提华纳 你知道...
We went to Tijuana, Mexico,you know...
我们认为去看表演会很有趣
and we thought it would be fun,you know, to go to this show.
每个人都想看看表演如何
Everyone's, "You gottacheck out one of these shows."
知道吗，是一个女人和马干
And, you know,it's a woman fucking a horse.
我们到了哪，我们以为会很可怕...
We get there, and, you know,we think it's gonna be awesome...
但是，不想听起来那么酷
and it is not as coolas it sounds like it would be, man.
看起来很粗俗 是啊
It's kind of gross.- Yeah.
你认为,一个女人和马干...
You think,"A woman fucking a horse"...
等你你到了那...
and you get there and it's...
结果就是一个女人和马干 噢
...a woman fucking a horse.- Yeah.
真是浪费了那个女人
It was really giving it to her.
你知道吗...
And you know what...
说实话, 我觉得这对那个女的不好 我们都觉得这对那个女的不好
to be honest, I felt bad for her.We all just felt bad for her.
是啊 对那个马也不好
Yeah.- Kind of felt bad for the horse.
哇 果然有趣 那么你周末过得如何?
Wow, that's something.- So what did you get up to?
你知道的, 我就是打发时间 我....
You know, I just kind of hung out.I was...
星期五 我回到家...
God, Friday, when I went home...
我很想吃一个鸡蛋沙拉三明治
I really wantedan egg-salad sandwich.
我突然非常想吃，我就对自己说
And I was just obsessingabout it and I was like:
伙计，自己动手做一个吧
"Man, I'm gonna make one of those."
所以，周六 我出去买♥♥东西 我买♥♥了, 一打鸡蛋...
So Saturday I went out and I got,like, a dozen eggs...
我把鸡蛋都煮了...
and I boiled them alland then I just...
我大概,不记得了,大概化了3个小时...
I spent, I don't know,probably three hours...
也许3个半小时来做...
like, three-and-a-half hoursmaking...
你知道, 蛋黄酱 还有洋葱和胡椒粉...
you know, the mayonnaiseand the onions and paprika...
你知道，所有的佐料和配菜
and, you know, all the accoutrement.
可是, 当我准备完了...
And then, by the time I was done...
我真的感觉不想吃了
I just really didn't feellike eating it.
我能想象得出 而且我也没有面包片
I can imagine.- And I didn't have any bread.
所以，你知道 过得还不错 很不错的周末
So, you know, it was pretty good.It was a good weekend.
听起来挺可怕 是啊，还可以
Sounds pretty awesome.- Yeah, it was fine.
听起来真得不错
Sounds really fun.
酷 酷
Cool.- Cool.
酷 酷
Cool, cool.
嘿, Paula. 什么事
Hey, Paula.- Yeah.
我要告诉你点事情. 我真的很兴奋
I gotta tell you something.I'm really excited about it.
还是第一次,今天我醒来...
For the first time today,I woke up...
我来到商店,我觉得很有信心对你说...
I came to the store,and I feel confident to say to you...
如果你不把这个你一直播放了2年的...
that if you don't takethis Michael McDonald DVD...
的Michael McDonald的DVD拿出来...
that you've been playingfor two years straight, off...
我会把店里的人都杀了..
I'm going to kill everyonein the store...
然后对自己脑袋开一枪
and put a bullet in my brain.
David, 你建议我播放什么呢? 我不管 任何的都行
David, what do you suggest we play?- I don't care. Anything.
我宁愿看美女与野兽
I would rather watchBeautician and the Beast.
我宁可听8个小时的Fran Drescher...
I would rather listento Fran Drescher for eight hours...
也不要再听Michael McDonald
than have to listento Michael McDonald.
我不是针对他,但是如果我在一次Yah Mo B There...
Nothing against him, but if I hearYah Mo B There one more time...
我就要yah mo放把火把这个地方烧个干净
I'm gonna yah mo burn this placeto the ground.
你这个自作聪明的家伙，滚回你干活的地方去
You're such a smart ass.Get back on the floor.
去你♥妈♥的♥
Fuck you.
这个是很棒的电视 等离子是最棒的
This is a great TV.Nothing beats a plasma.
你在干什么? 这是我的客人
What are you doing?That's my customer.
肯定不是 当我走向她的时候，她没人接待
It certainly is not.When I came upon her, she was unattended.
不, 这是我... 等等
No, that's my...- Wait.
去收款处 请在那里领♥取♥
Go to the checkout there.Pick up there, please.
她没人接待 是因为我到后面去..
She was unattendedbecause I went to the back...
拿她要的宣传手册了
to get the brochurethat she requested.
我很抱歉, 但是太晚了
I apologize, but it's too late.
处理结束了
The transaction has been completed.
所以奖金的一半你要分给我
Then you're gonna give mehalf the commission.
你一分钱都别想拿到
You'll receive none of the commission.
我要和Paula谈谈 真是疯了
I need to talk to Paula.This is crazy.
简直是胡扯
This is bullshit.
我每次卖♥♥出东西去 你都去对Paula大哭大叫
Every time I make a sale,you go crying to Paula.
Jesse Jackson如何? 老Jesse需要借口
How about Jesse Jackson?Old Jesse needs a cause.
你抢我的客人，真让我恶心
Sick of you poaching my customers.
你这个鼻涕虫也让我恶心
I'm sick of your crybaby bullshit.
你想让这个混♥蛋♥滚出去吗? 就带他出去踩扁他?
You wanna take this shit outside?Just take it outside and squash it?
我们待在店里 所以每个人就都知道你有多脓包了, 如何?
Let's stay inside, so everybody can seewhat a pussy you have, okay?
因为我的刀丛刀鞘中抽出来...
Because when I remove the bladeI keep in my boot from its sheath...
不沾血就不回鞘
I can't return ituntil it has spilled blood.
听着, 听我说 你惹错人了
Look, listen to me. You are fuckingwith the wrong nigger.
嘿!你惹错黑鬼了, 懂吗?
Hey! You're fucking withthe wrong sun-nigger, okay?
伙计, 我要你的头巾勒死你
Dude, I will hang your old assby your turban.
头巾? 你看见我有他妈的头巾了吗?
Turban now? Do you seeany fucking turban here?
我说话像穆♥斯♥林♥吗?
Do I talk like a turban guy?
我说,嘿, Jay, 你是否需要拖鞋? 你要拖鞋吗?
Do I say, "Hey, Jay, do you want a Slurpee?You want a Slurpee?"
去你♥妈♥的♥ 明白吗? 我出生在布鲁克林
Fuck you, okay?I was born in Brooklyn.
布鲁克林, 懂吗?
Brooklyn, okay?
我有布鲁克林口音, 明白吗? 行吗?
My accent is a fuckingBrooklyn accent, okay? Okay?
好吧,伙计 冷静, 伙计
All right, man.Calm down, dude.
听着，你还是替我做周五的工还是什么?
Look, you still coveringmy shift on Friday or what?
如果我能得到这次的奖金，我很乐意
If I can keep this commission,with pleasure.
那么 好吧 好吧 没问题
Cool, then. All right, pop.- No problem.
Andy如何? 不
How about Andy?- No.
的了, 伙计. 我们要凑5个人...
Come on, man.We need, what, five guys...
才能玩牌,对吧? 是啊
...to play a decent poker game, right?- Yeah.
如果我们玩不成,我就不得不...
If we cancel this,I'm gonna have to go...
和Jill一起去参加一些傻瓜的生日晚会...
to some stupid-assbirthday party with Jill...
我可不想那样
and that shit ain't happening.
不 为什么不?
No.- Why not?
他的确是和好人而且我确信...
He's a really nice guy and allbut I'm pretty sure that...
他是一个连环杀手
he is a serial murderer.
谁在乎, 伙计? 他是个好人
Who cares, man?He's a nice guy.
我就想喝个烂醉 还有打牌
I just wanna get drunk,fucked up, and play some cards.
很好 听着, 我可不想吊死在...
That's great.Look, I don't wanna end up a lampshade...
我住的那个公♥寓♥的吊灯上
in some creepy apartment,that's what I'm saying.
我看别无选择
I don't really see any other options.
Andy 老兄
Andy. My man.
今天晚上有什么安排吗?
You got any planslater on tonight?
怎么了，新到一批索尼CD我们要卸车吗?
Why, do we have to unloadthe Sony truck?
不, 我们大家想聚一下,打打牌...
No, the guys are getting together,we're playing some poker...
你要不要来一起玩
thought, you know,you'd wanna play.