西伯利亚（2020）

我小时候
When I was a kid.
每当夏天
In the Summer
我都会和父亲还有两个兄弟去加拿大北部钓鱼
I will go out to northern Canada with my father and two brothers to fishing
这是一场充满男子情谊的旅行
The one male-bonding thing we did
也是我那工作狂小镇青年的父亲能够做好的唯一一件事
And the only extravagant thing my workholic good country boy father could master
我们乘坐丛林飞机 就是那种发出垂直起降的小飞机
We flew by bush plane small planes with plumb tunes
来到无人的野湖边 住在一个生活在这里很多年的老猎人家里
Into a wilderness lake where we would be met by an old trapper who lived there year around
这人已经有20年没有回归文明世界了
He hadn't been back to civilization for twenty years
只通过短波与钓鱼营组织者联♥系♥
And communicated with the fish camp organizers on a short wave radio
我们来到他营地时
Once we got to his camp
我发现他住的小房♥子围着一圈小木屋
I groped small cabins nestled around his little house
它们不是很高 大概是骨堆高度
with the size that can't high with the mountain of dread bones
除此之外 还有一小群嗜酒如命的印第安人 带我们到湖边 作为我们的导游
Behind, there were tippies of small group of grey Indians who would take us to the water and be our guides
他们都有一些简单的名字 比如：汤姆 皮特 罗德 莱德 比利 迪尔
They had names like: Tom, Pete, Rod, Red, Billy, Dear
个个都在磨洋工 而且是酗酒狂
All toothless, passive, and alchoholic
但是他们在工作期间不准饮酒
However they are not allowed to liquor while they worked
而他们的眼中写满了愤怒 也许是真的想要喝酒
although their eyes always worn angry blood shot, I bet so they may be worth sneaking drinks
他们的确是浪漫主义者形象的萌芽
They were truly romantic figures go on to seed
无论如何 最重要的是 老猎人在营地里养了一群用来拉雪橇的哈士奇
Anyway the point: At this camp, there was a group of huskies that the trapper kept for his dogslide for work in the winter
直到我们快要走之后 他才把这些狗赶走
It wasn't until we started going that this guy get rid of them for his normal bill
这些狗很可爱 但同样也很野 甚是怕人
These dogs were sweet, but wild enough to be scary
对于六岁的我而言 最大的挑战在于晚上离开小屋上厕所 只要你走出去 这些狗就一直追着你
The biggest challenge for me at six year's old, was running from our cabin to the out house, because the dogs would chase you and went back to the hills
你一进厕所 它们就会不停地抓外面的门
When you're in the outhouse, they would scrach out the door and gravel
实在是太可怕了
horrific
解决完毕以后 你就必须飞快地跑回自己的小屋 但愿别被它咬住
And then, when you're through, you'd race back to the safier cabin, hoping the nips wouldn't turn into bites
好
good
它们饿了
They're hungry
要糖吗？
Sugar?
再来一杯 再下次注
I can get another one, and another chance
你来一局？
-How about you play?
你想都别想
-Never
为什么？
-Why?
我不需要玩这个
-I don't need to
但你也可能会赢
But you might win
不 我不想赢
No, I don't wanna win
为什么不？
Why?
因为我不想输
I don't want lose
中了 中了
there you go.... there you go
停...停
come on... come on
来....来....
come on baby...come on
还行吗？
good?
比乔？
Bicho?
比乔？
Bicho?
我不明白
I don't understand
你为什么会和她那种人发♥生♥关♥系♥
How you can have anything to do with someone like her
只是你不明白 不代表没道理
Just because you don't understand doesn't mean that it cannot be
但是为什么？
But why?
你问错了
That's the wrong question
真正的问题在于 它发生在这个世界上了吗？答案是“是的”
The right question is: "Is this the way of the world?" and the answer is "yes"
你又知道些什么？
What do you know?
你与世隔绝
You don't live in the world
你陷入了这里 宇宙的尽头 你无法察觉到自己的自私
You stuck yourself here, the end of the universe, and here, you can't see your selfishness
自大 与无知
arrogance, and above all, your ignorance
你装出欢迎这个世界的样子
You pretend to be open to all things
但却不知道 自己实际上有多自闭
But can't see, how close-minded you are
你真的相信在这里能寻得自己的灵魂？
Do you actually believe you'll find your soul here?
我的灵魂在我的里面
My soul is within me
又错了 我的兄弟 你的灵魂在你之外 这一点你不得不承认
Wrong again, brother, your soul is outside of you and you must claim it
我也有灵魂
I have,
我在旅行 你是我的终点
I began a journey and finished to you
根本没有什么起点
There is no beginning
也没有什么终点
There's no end,
你说的是圣经 不是你灵魂的语言
that's Bible, that's not the language of the soul
时过境迁
Time will pass
你仍旧在不断迷失自我
And you continue to be lost
你说话和我父亲一个样
You soundd like my father
你一直抱怨你父亲根本不懂你
You complained that your father didn't know you
但是他把你带到这个世界的
He carried you on his bed through life
但你所批评的 无非是他的一些小错误
And all you can do is criticize some oversights he committed
然而你 才是罪人中的罪魁
While you, are guilty of the biggest crimes
也许吧 那么我究竟犯了什么罪？
Maybe, what crimes were those
你说呢？
You tell me
我不希望这些话从我口中说出 这样你就会否认
Instead you like to hear some from my mouth, so you can deny it
这也正是你和你父亲拙劣的故伎重演
that's the same cowardly game you played with your father
我爱我父亲
I love my father
你可不是什么孝子
You are not a loving son
你是他的负担
You're a burden to him
现在 也是我的负担
and now, to me
我花了很长时间 迎合这世界的一切
When I had been pandering many different things to myself for a long time
也惶惶不可终日地寻找自己的优点
and have many days when seeking for my own self and what I am good was
以及什么样的邪恶是要避免的
and what evil was to be avoided.
它们在向我言说
They certainly spoke to me
我是自己还是他人？
I am self or someone else?
它在我内在 还是外在？
inside or outside of me?
这正是我想知道的
this is the very things I would love to know
不过 不
but don't
不行
No
我不想死
I just want it to save to death
我不想死
I just want it to save the death
我不想死
I just want it to save the death
我不想死
I just want it to save the death
我不想死
I just want it to save the death
“等一下医生”
"Await for the doctor"
“等一下医生”
"Await for the doctor"
“等一下医生”
"Await for the doctor"
“等一下医生”
"Await for the doctor"
“等一下医生”
"Await for the doctor"
医生在哪里
where is the doctor
医生在哪里
where is the doctor
请教我如何去死
teach me how to die
请教我如何去死
teach me how to die
医生在哪
Where is the doctor
医生在哪
Where is the doctor
医生在哪
Where is the doctor
医生在哪
Where is the doctor
医生在哪
Where is the doctor Where is the doctor
医生在哪
Where is the doctor
医生在哪
Where is the doctor
给我找个医生
the doctor please
我很高兴你来找我
I am glad you hit me
爸？
Dad?
我只想找些工具
I just gotta to get some gear
什么工具？
What gear?
我答应过带你去钓鱼
I promised you I take you fishing
我得把船从车♥库♥里弄出来
just gotta go get the boat out of the garage
然后咱们经过比尔根山 一路直到老鹧鸪湖
It should up to the Billrgan, head up that the cracken down to old partridge's lake
这可比宅在家里看电视有趣多了
to it will be a heck of a lot more fun than sitting around watching TV
那爸
And dad
你不记得医生怎么说的吗？
You don't even remember the doctor said?
他说了什么？
What did he say?
他说你已经死了
He said you dead
别听他瞎说
Don't listen to that
告诉我 你现在几年级？
Tell me again what grade you in?
我不在乎 我去钓鱼了
I never mind, I'm going a fishing
我们在太阳升起前到达弗里芒
We get to Fremont before the sun comes up
我以我的手艺骄傲
I love my craft in the water
我制♥作♥了很多工具
Fill it up with gear
钓竿
Poles
索具箱、救生圈
tackle boxes, life preservers
以及装满了奶酪牛油肠三明治薯片的冰柜
And Ice chest full of cheese Bull-oney sandwiches potato chips