BJ单身日记

Well, what about Lara?
结束了 全都结束了
Oh, over, over. Totally fucking finito.
把我踹了
Dumped me.
她意识到我忘不了你就把我甩了
Dumped me when she realized that I hadn't got over you.
我知道 我知道你在想
I know you, I know you're thinking...
那只是有性无爱 但是我向你保证
it's just a sex thing, but I promise you...
每次我在电视上看到那条超短裙
whenever I see that skimpy little skirt on TV...
我就会闭上眼睛
I just close my eyes and listen...
听你说过的那些充满智慧的话语
to all the intelligent things you've said.
库尔德那家伙被无罪释放了我也很激动
I was thrilled that little Kurdish bloke was set free.
布丽姬特
Bridge...
我好想你
I missed you a lot.
天啊
Oh, God.
我要走了 再见
I'm going now. Bye.
马克 留下来 我们...
Mark, stay. We...
不 我不想留下来
No, I don't think I will.
别走 别因为我扫了兴
Well, listen, don't leave on my behalf.
我想也是时候把我们之间的过去都放下了
I think it's time you and I put this past behind us.
你觉得呢 达西
Don't you think, Darcy?
至少留下来跟我和布丽姬特
At least stay for a birthday drink...
喝一杯庆生酒
with me and Bridge, huh?
再见 布丽姬特
Good-bye, Bridget.
马克
Mark.
你为什么过来
Why are you here?
布丽姬特
Bridge...
我刚跟你说了为什么
I just told you why I'm here.
为什么马克·混♥蛋♥·达西在这
Why was Mark "Wanker" Darcy here?
天呐 等等 他回来了
Oh, bloody hell. Wait a minute. He's back.
行了 克利弗 去外面
All right, Cleaver, outside.
什么
I'm sorry?
去外面
Outside?
我是该带决斗手♥枪♥还是该带剑
Uh, should I bring my duelling pistols or my sword?
好吧 等一下
All right. Hang on.
几年前我就该这么做了
I should've done this years ago.
做什么
Done what?
这个
This.
操
Fuck!
操♥他♥妈♥的 太疼了
Fuck me, that hurt!
你♥他♥妈♥的以为自己在干什么呢
What the fuck do you think you're doing?
这个
This.
天呐 不要再打了
Oh, Christ, not again.
打起来了
Fight!
什么
What?
什么
What?
快点啊
Well, quick!
真打起来了
It's a real fight!
打起来了
It's a fight!
好了 好了 好了
All right, all right, all right.
我放弃 我放弃
I give up. I give up.
给我一点时间 好吗
Just give me a moment, all right? Just...
让我缓一下 行吗
Let me get a moment's break here, OK?
作弊
Cheat!
作弊 作弊
Cheat! Cheat!
我早该知道的
I should've knew it!
我们站哪一边
Whose side are we on?
当然是马克这边
Mark's, obviously.
他可没因为什么美国裸女就把布丽姬特甩了
He's never dumped Bridget for some naked American.
他还说喜欢她真实的样子
And he said he liked her just the way she is.
是没错 但是他跟丹尼尔的未婚妻偷♥情♥
Yeah, but he also shagged Daniel's fiancée...
让他心碎不已
and left him broken hearted.
有道理 这次真的很难抉择
Good point. It's a very hard one to call.
BGM: It's Raining Men by Geri Halliwell
♪ It's raining men ♪
♪ Hallelujah, it's raining men ♪
太好了
Oh, yes!
马克
Mark!
对不起 对不起
I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry, all right?
天呐 抱歉
Oh, God, I'm sorry.
真的非常抱歉
I really am sorry.
我 我来付钱
I... I will pay.
够了吗 达西
Had enough, Darcy?
还没有 如果你觉得没问题
Not quite, if that's all right by you.
你把我下巴打断了
You broke my bloody jaw!
♪ 祝你生日快乐 ♪
♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
♪ 祝你生日快乐 ♪
♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
♪ 祝你生日快乐 亲爱的你叫什么 ♪
♪ Happy birthday, dear what's-his-name ♪
♪ 祝你生日快乐 ♪
♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
♪ It's raining men ♪
♪ Hallelujah, it's raining men ♪
天呐
Jesus.
行了
All right.
行了吗 够了
All right? Enough.
够了
Enough.
够了
Enough.
混♥蛋♥
Wanker.
你什么毛病
What is your problem?
-我有毛病 -对
- My problem? - Yes.
你给人一种有品德又高尚的形象
You give the impression of being all moral and noble...
还很正常
and normal...
还是厨房♥里的好帮手
and helpful in the kitchen...
但是你和其他的人一样坏
but you're just as bad as the rest of them.
看来我一直都活在误解里
Well, I can see that I've been labouring under a misapprehension.
一个非常非常愚蠢的错误 请原谅我
A very, very foolish mistake. Forgive me.
我们回楼上吧
Let's go back upstairs.
走吧
Come on.
我们注定要在一起 琼斯
We belong together, Jones.
我 你
Me, you.
可怜的小短裙
Poor little skirt.
好吧
Right.
如果我和你不能长久
If I can't make it with you...
我和谁都不能长久
I can't make it with anyone.
对我来说这个还不够好
That's not a good enough offer for me.
我不愿意堵上我整个人生
I'm not willing to gamble my whole life...
和一个
on someone who's...
我说不准的人身上
well, not quite sure.
就像你说的
It's like you said.
我还在寻找
I'm still looking for something...
比这个更特别的东西
more extraordinary than that.
♪ 叮咚 开心地站在高地 ♪
♪ Ding dong, merrily on high ♪
12月25日
December 25.
体重 63.5公斤
Weight... 140 pounds...
加42块肉饼
Plus forty-two mince-pies.
饮酒量
Alcohol units...
几千杯吧
Oh, thousands.
滚开
Bugger off!
走吧 孩子们
Come on, kids.
这款巴洛克式挂钟
This baroque carriage clock...
是我在节日期间的最爱
is a particular festive favourite of mine...
融入了哈利路亚合唱团演唱的
incorporating the Hallelujah Chorus...
亨德尔的《弥赛亚》
from Handel's "Messiah"...
整点报时
every hour on the hour.
我理解不了
I don't understand it.
这个人整个变红了
The man's actually turned red now.
圣诞快乐 帕梅拉
Merry Christmas, Pamela.
我要去睡觉觉了
I'm going to Bedfordshire.
晚安
Night, night.
晚安
Night, night.
实际上
The thing is...
靠得足够近去看 他脸都紫了
well, close up, he was almost purple.
你的肤色这么正常
You were such a lovely normal colour.
他的脾气非常臭
He had a filthy temper.
珠宝的确华贵
And, well, the jewellery is fabulous...
价格也非常合理
and really very reasonably priced and...