弗兰奇·博伊尔：曲马朵之夜（2010）

大家好啊
Hello!
你好啊 大块头
How you doing, big chap?
你这发型配你这胡子真不错
I like this hair and beard arrangement.
你是从 猜猜我是谁 这游戏里逃出来的吗
Haven't you just escaped from a game of Guess Who?
绝对是我家闺女的画风啊
I'm sure my daughter created you
作画工具是磁铁一块 铁屑若干
with a magnet and some filings the other day.
这是你媳妇
Is this your woman?
是的
It is.
这大块头是怎么吸引到你的? 靠重力?
What first attracted you to the big chap? Gravity?
你是做哪一行的?
What do you do?
我为议会工作
I work for the council.
具体为议会做啥啊
What do you do for the council?
就行政啥的
Just admin.
就行政啥的?
Just admin?
没啥要紧的
Nothing important.
没啥要紧的 "求放过 Frankie"?
Nothing important. "Move along, Frankie"?
你觉得这么说我能放过你 这策略有用?
Think that's going to work out for you, that strategy?
我绝对会狠狠虐你的
I'll abuse you so badly
虐到你觉得我特像是你们家故交
you'll think I was a friend of the family.
你有什么特别的行政管理方向不
What area of council admin do you specialise in?
这样大家恨起你来也好有个方向
So we can hate you in a specific way,
要不这会儿 我们恨你恨得略笼统啊
rather than the general way we're hating you at the moment.
社会福利工作
Social work.
社会福利工作?
Social work?
观众表示同情
Ohhh!
这就对了 这样目标就明显了不是
There you go. That's sharpened it up a bit, hasn't it?
你们那里有专门用来偷小孩儿的网子不?
Have you got a net for stealing children?
你这看起来略瘆人啊 你自己知道不
You have a slightly haunted look about you, do you know that?
看起来希望破灭 一脸惨淡
A slightly haunted, broken look.
你最恨生活的那一部分
What do you hate most about life?
是你小时候被亲爹猥亵了
Is it the fact that your dad fucked you
还是事实上你很享受这一过程
or the fact that you enjoyed it?
我真心没想到 说这样的话也木啥后果
Genuinely surprised I'm getting away with that,
事实证明
but there we go.
完全没事儿啊
Seem to be getting away with it.
你呢 大个子 你还好吧 你是做什么的
How you doing, big man? You all right? What do you do?
我是踢球的
I play football.
踢球的? 职业的?
play football? Professionally?
- 是的 - 那个俱乐部的
- Aye. - Who for?
（本人体育盲 是不是真的烂队完全不懂啊）
- 邓弗姆林 - 邓弗姆林 那就不是职业的了
- Dunfermline. - Dunfermline. not professionally.
（俄♥罗♥斯♥寡头 切尔西足球俱乐部老板）
罗曼?阿布拉莫维奇是个阴险的贱♥人♥对吧
Roman Abramovich, he is a sinister fucker, isn't he?
我觉得正是因为阿布拉莫维奇阴险狡诈
I think because Abramovich is so sinister,
曼联的亚历克斯?弗格森才会建起一支（曼联队教练）
that's why Alex Ferguson at Man U has had to build up
全由长了一张打不死小强的脸的丑逼球员组成的足球队
a team of ugly men who look like they'd be impossible to kill.
比如说韦恩鲁尼
Like Wayne Rooney.
你怎么可能弄得死鲁尼
How would you kill Wayne Rooney?
你要是冲他脑门正中开一枪
If you put a bullet through the middle of Wayne Rooney's head,
估计结局不过是 他边吹口哨边跑走而已（是说他没脑子?）
all that would happen would be that he whistled when he ran.
我看到报道说
I wasn't surprised to hear
鲁尼滚个床单还要花钱的时候一点都不惊讶
that Rooney had to pay someone to have sex with him.
我以为对象是他老婆来着
I just assumed it would be his wife.
至少现在没人记得他和老奶奶滚传♥单♥的事儿了
At least he won't be remembered now for shagging a granny.
别急着否定和老奶奶滚床单啊
Don't knock shagging a granny,
通常她们会往你口袋里塞五块钱 然后说
because often they'll stick 5 in your pocket and say,
别告诉你麻麻
"Don't tell your mum."
他们担心这事儿会让在赛场上分心
They're worried it's going to distract him from his football.
对鲁尼来说 一块糖纸就能叫他分心了
You could distract Wayne Rooney with a piece of shiny paper.
我惊讶的是 都不用往球里装个铃铛
I'm surprised they can get him to chase after a ball
他就知道追着跑了
without putting a bell in it.
他不是第一个
He's not the first footballer
因为21岁的应♥召♥女郎惹上麻烦的球员了
to have got in trouble with a 21-year-old escort.
（escort有应♥召♥女郎和福睿斯这一车型的双重意思）
Stan Collymore因为鸡鸡卡在排气管也吃了不少苦
Stan Collymore got his cock stuck in the exhaust of one.
鲁尼 他刚得了一个宝宝对吧
He's just had a baby,hasn't he, Rooney?
在分娩的时候他可是派上了大用场
He must have been an asset at the birth.
快看！科琳整出了个带脸的玩意儿！
"Look! Coleen done a jobbie with a face!"
最近南非是要开世界杯了
We had the World Cup in South Africa.
因为艾滋病的威胁 这次的世界杯显得与众不同
A very different World Cup because of the very real threat of HIV...
威胁由英格兰队奉上
presented by the England team.
大家都在抱怨世界杯上那个叫呜呜祖拉的东西
Everyone was complaining about the vuvuzelas at the World Cup,
那玩意儿的分贝数堪比飞机起飞
the same decibels as a plane taking off.
"飞机起飞"为啥每次都躺枪?
Why is it always a plane taking off?
下次说点原创性的不好吗 比如说
Why don't they think of something original? The same decibels
分贝数堪比帕瓦罗蒂拉拉链夹着蛋了
as Pavarotti getting his bell-end caught in his zip.
"英格兰队压力前所未有" 这帮货还能感受到压力?
"England folded under pressure." How can these guys feel pressure?
这些人能三人一起和未成年美发师玩儿4P的
These are men who can triple-team a teenage hairdresser
然后队友还在一边用手♥机♥拍
while their mate films it on a camera-phone.
我怕羞到 猫进了卫生间都尿不出来
I can't take a piss if the cat walks into the bathroom.
小贝夫妇又上头条了
Beckham was out there.
他们两貌似又想要追生一胎了
Apparently they're trying for another baby, the Beckhams.
我嘞个去啊
Fucking hell, man.
上那娘们儿
Shagging that woman
感觉就像是把鸡鸡从折叠椅上拔下来的感觉（辣妹太瘦）
must be like trying to separate deckchairs with your dick.
牛奶工的忏悔（这段略恶心 受不了屎尿屁的直接拖到7:10吧）
Robin Atkins在70年代的腐国性喜剧界赫赫有名
Robin Atkins made his name in the British sex comedies of the 1970s.
但渐渐的工作越来越少
But gradually the work dried up,
搬运工的忏悔 (1976)
哥伦比亚电影公♥司♥出品
一部分是因为上电影院的人整体上越来越少
partly because cinema-going fell into general decline.
还有一部分原因是 由于观念的转变
And partly because changing attitudes meant
人们开始觉得他的角色就是在实施性侵害
that people started to view his character as a serial sex offender.
他越挫越勇 去了洛杉矶
Undaunted, he made his way to Los Angeles,
加利福尼亚♥情♥欲 (1979)
罗伯特电影公♥司♥出品
妄图染指美国的色情片领域
and tried his hand on the American pornographic scene.'
我要你捅我的菊花
I want you in my ass.
捅...
In...
喂! 娘冬菜啥状况啊?
Hey! What the fruck?
哎呦喂!
Blimey!
你老公回来了
It's your husband.
我这就该跑路了
I guess I'd better get going, eh?
站住 哥们儿你哪儿都不许去
Uh-uh. You go nowhere,buddy.
表 我要他捅我菊花
No, I want him in my ass.
你听见了
You heard the lady.
傻♥逼♥牛奶工
Milk motherfucker.
喂 给哥挪挪地儿!
Hey! Make some room!
额滴个神啊
Oh, God!
Robin在80年代接了不少美国的活儿
Robin did a lot of US work in the 80s,
祸水Jane (1985)
Traskor电影公♥司♥出品
但从来就融不进去
but never really seemed to fit in.
就是那里
That's it.
继续啊
Oh, keep going.
事实上 他对工作已经开始不抱希望了
In fact, he became somewhat disillusioned with the work,
所以当有机会重新定居到德国的时候
and when the chance came to relocate to Germany,
Die Gestandnisse eines Fensterputzers (1993)
(玻璃工的忏悔)
他对做回老本行抱有极大的希望
he had high hopes of getting back to what he did best.
但是岁月流逝
But times had moved on.
Robin Atkins 于今日 死于艾滋
Robin Atkins, who died today, from AIDS.
今日哥伦比亚 接下来为您报道的是 娱乐新闻
Next on Colombia Today, show business news.
Pablita 你说说 这一周都发生了些什么啊
Tell me, Pablita, what's been happening this week?
Miguel Ramirez 男孩组合爆♥炸♥的经理人
Well, Miguel Ramirez, manager of a boy band Explosione,
否认了该组合即将重组的谣言
has laughed at rumours that the band are to reform,
因为他们全死了 被土匪毙了
as they are all dead! Killed by bandits.
同时 波哥大的夜晚这部剧的男女主演
Meanwhile, there have been rumours of romance
Randa Marinez和Javier Gomez传出了绯闻
between Bogota Nights co-stars Randa Marinez and Javier Gomez.
他们的经纪人否认了谣言 说两人都死了!
Their agents deny the rumours and say they're both dead!
被劫车时不当心弄死了
After a botched car jacking.
这周是不是堕落帕尔梅拉电影版的首映式吗
Wasn't this week the premiere of the movie version of Palmeira Vice?
是的
Yes.
该电影所有的主演齐聚一堂 然后 全死了!
All the stars of the film were there and they are all now dead!
影院被炸了
After the cinema was firebombed.
为什么啊
But why?