弗兰奇·博伊尔：曲马朵之夜（2010）

本节目含严重粗口 内容黄暴
This programme contains very strong language throughout
不适合任何人观看(怎么成南方公园了)
and scenes that some viewers may find disturbing.
大家好 欢迎来到嗑药之夜
Hello, and welcome to Tramadol Nights.
过的怎么样啊 你♥他♥妈♥看起来不是个政♥府♥军 就是个恐♥怖♥分♥子♥啊
How are you doing, ya big fuckin' loyalist, terrorist suspect?
你个坐在第一排的双性恋枪♥械♥狂人
You big, gun running bisexual down the front here.
哥们 过的不错吧?
How are you doing, man?
我一直以为这种脸只会出现在马克杯上
That's a face I've only ever seen before on a fuckin' Toby Jug.
(这个木有理解 是因为格瓦拉的马克杯很流行?)
先前我都没看到这位!
I never even seen him there!
你今天是直接从维多利亚时期的监狱里
You've quantum leaped to be with us tonight
穿越到这里的吧
from the Victorian prison system.
灭迹乐团解散之后过的怎么样?(流行舞曲的英伦乐队)
How's life been since Erasure split up?
你的脸看上去像是Andy Bell(灭迹的主唱)和在罐头里腌制过的死胎的混合体
A cross between Andy Bell and a pickled fetus in a fuckin' jar.
或者是小孩涂鸦出来的死婴的样子 哥们过的怎么样?
Like a child's drawing of a dead baby, how are you doing?
你为毛拿外套盖住蛋蛋?
Why have you got your jacket spread over your baws?
啊 现在懂了 是因为你裤子提的太上
Oh, I see, cos you've got your trousers pulled up so tight
蛋蛋看起来像是阴♥道♥一样
you've got one of those ball vaginas.
你有什么故事啊 哥们? 我们来稍微了解一下你 你是做什么的?
What's your story, man? Let's find out a bit about you, what do you do?
消防队员
Fireman.
消防队员! 哈哈!
You're a fireman! Ha-ha!
加入了致敬村民组合的乐队?
In a Village People tribute band?
(村民(Village People)是创于上世纪70年代的经典男子演唱组合
成员分别装扮成警官、印第安酋长、建筑工人、士兵、摩托车手和牛仔)
教皇前阵子来了不是? 他说自己很喜欢住在英国
We had the Pope over, didn't we? He said he loved being in Britain,
因为他的纳粹兄弟们最多只打到了法兰西
as most of his Nazi pals only ever made it as far as France.
教皇的座驾很环保的
Very environmentally friendly, the Popemobile,
是由被性侵的侍童的眼泪驱动的
as it runs on the tears of abused altar boys.
我必须指出教皇不是恋童癖
I should point out the Pope isn't a paedophile,
他只是推动了恋童的潮流
he's a paedophile facilitator.
教皇去见苏珊大妈一面 必须的
Met Susan Boyle, what a meeting that must have been,
世界上两个最不该穿裙子的人
two people who look unconvincing in a dress.
他以为她是来寻求治愈的
He thought she was there to be cured.
不对 他说他很高兴见到了苏珊大妈 这让他想起了
No, he said he loved meeting Susan Boyle, it took him back
自己年轻时 还在接受杀害精神病人的训练
to his youth, when he was being trained to kill the mentally ill.
教皇说套套不能防止艾滋的传播
The Pope says that condoms don't stop the spread of AIDS,
有人得提醒一下这挫人他戴的不对
someone should tell the fucker that he's putting them on wrong!
对于我来说 宗教 任何宗教 都是将自闭症患者们
To me, religion, all religions, are just a list of things
几百年前说过的话列成清单
that autistic people said thousands of years ago,
碰巧又被人们当真了
that happened to get taken seriously.
在星期五只能吃鱼! 除了鱼什么都不能吃!
"On a Friday you can only eat fish! Nothin' but fish!"
(耶稣受难是在星期五 所以天主教♥徒♥在周五需要守斋不能吃肉)
太有有道理了 我要记下来
"Brilliant, I'll write it down."
宗教不过是在我们以前对"精神病"的解释
Religion's just what we thought before we understood what mental illness was.
"哎呦 那灌木向我传播了教义"
"A bush talked to me."
"好腻害! 说了啥 它教了我们啥?"
Brilliant! What did it say? what did the bush say?
"我们该遵从灌木丛教给我的教义 你们这群傻♥逼♥"
"Let's live our lives by what the bush said, ya stupid fuckin' cunts."
记得我很小的时候 觉得...
I mean, I think back to priests when I was a wee boy,
神父都有艾斯伯格综合症的症状
they had a sort of Asperger's quality to them.
(主要表现为活动内容刻板和重复、社会互动功能受损、兴趣狭窄、注意力集中困难、运动协调能力差以及情绪很脆弱等)
从没有一个神父是有脑子的 我要进行驱魔仪式
You never met a witty priest. "I was doing an exorcism,
"我告诉魔鬼从男孩的体内出来
"I was telling the devil to come out of the boy
"魔鬼进行了很有力的反驳
"and the devil made the very good point
"说作为神父的我进入过的男孩绝对比他要多"
"that as a priest I'd probably been inside more children than he had.
"别这么说人家嘛 撒旦大人"
"Touche, Satan."
你们还记得"霹雳游侠"吗?
Do you remember that show Knight Rider?
(David Hasselhoff扮演的游侠驾驶着人工智能跑车KITT惩恶扬善)
我们开始觉得其实他的车不会说话
We started thinking his car wasn't talking to him,
他只是精神严重有病
he was just quite seriously mentally ill.
霹雳游侠 一个脑袋里只剩浆糊的汉子
'Knight Rider, a shadowy flight
如同一闪而过的黑影 穿梭在这个危险的世界
'into the dangerous world of a man whose mind has turned to shit.'
霹雳游侠
开窗 Kitt
Windows, Kitt.
没问题 Michael
Certainly, Michael.
关窗 Kitt
Windows up, Kitt.
是时候问问那个生意人我这周的任务是什么了
Time to ask the old business guy what this week's mission is.
生意人! 这周有什么任务吗?
Old business guy! You got a mission for me?
Michael! 你妈和我都很担心你
Michael! Your mother and I are very worried about you.
你最近吃药了没?
Are you taking your medication?
Michael你能把车还给我们吗?
We would really like our car back, Michael.
我觉得你不该吃药Michael
'I don't think it's a good idea to take your medication, Michael,
我知道塔♥利♥班♥的人在你的药里下了东西
'I think the Taliban have put something in them
会导致多发性硬化
'that gives you multiple sclerosis.'
谢谢你的提醒Kitt!
Thanks for the warning, Kitt!
提速到110码
Take her up to 110.
没问题 Michael
'Certainly, Michael.
你不是该坐在驾驶座上?
'Don't you think you should sit in the driver's seat?'
我的传感器显示 拐角那里有俩哥们在嗑药
'My sensors tell me there are two men round the corner smoking crack, Michael.
Michael?
'Michael?
我的传感器显示现在有仨哥们在嗑药了
'My sensors tell me there are now three people smoking crack.
噢 Michael
'Oh, Michael.'
看那里! 是那个邪恶版霹雳游侠!
Look! It's evil Knight Rider!
那只是我们在车窗上的倒影 Michael
'No, that's just our reflection in the window, Michael.'
好吧
OK.
你说啥 Kitt?
What was that, Kitt?
我什么也没说啊
'I didn't say anything, Michael,
可能是我的声线和那个你关在后备箱里的女人很像
'I think my voice must sound similar to that woman you have tied up in the trunk.
Michael 你渗入那个贩卖♥♥毒品的黑帮了吗?
'Have you managed to infiltrate the drugs gang, Michael?'
渗入? 我他妈的连个餐厅都进不去
Infiltrate? I couldn't even get into the fucking restaurant.
这里有任何制鞋的材料吗?
Is there anything here I could use to make shoes?
邪恶版的霹雳游侠偷走了所有的制鞋材料
Fucking evil Knight Rider, stealing all the shoemaking shit!
你好
Hi.
Michael?
'Michael?'
不好意思 我的车跟我说话呢
Excuse me, it's my car.
怎么了 Kitt?
What is it, Kitt?
披萨盒式的鞋很帅啊
'The Calamari looks good, Michael.'
谢谢啦 Kitt
Thanks, Kitt.
药拿来了吗?
Have you got the drugs?
是的 就在这里
Yes, I have. Right here.
六千颗红色的小药丸
6,000 little red pills
我们马上就能知道究竟是什么药品了
and any minute now we should find out exactly what they are.
你要是愿意的话 可以严刑拷打逼问我
You could try torturing me if you like,
我都已经自我逼问半个多小时了
I've been trying it myself for the last half hour
还是一点感觉都没有
and I haven't felt a thing.
药物肯定是开始起作用了 我觉着自己是一直在笑
They must be working because I feel like I'm smiling!
Kitt!
Kitt!
你竟然被偷了
You've been stolen.
别担心 Michael 我只是变身成了那里的那辆车
'Don't worry, Michael, I've just changed to that car over there.
一个扮作孕妇的敌方人员 开着我走呢
'I'm being driven by an enemy agent disguised as a pregnant woman.'
别急 Kitt
Don't worry, Kitt.
我会抓住她的
I'll get her.
给她点颜色瞧瞧 一个咪♥咪♥来一个色
'Send a message, Michael, one in each tit.'
你能回来真是太好了 Kitt
Great to have you back, Kitt!
谢谢了 Michael!
'Thanks, Michael!'
谢谢了 Michael!
'Thanks, Michael!'
谁在那儿?
Who was that?
啊 我是引擎之类的东西
'Oh, I'm the engine or some shit.'
是涡轮加速系统 Michael!
'Turbo boost, Michael!'
听出来了 Kitt 涡轮加速系统
Yes, Kitt, turbo boost!
开窗啊 Kitt!
Windows, Kitt!
快开窗 Kitt!
Windows, Kitt!
BBC正准备打造一部全新的剧作
'As they try to create a show which will appeal
这部剧能够受全部人的欢迎 且不会冒犯到任何人
'to all demographics without giving offence,
所以新出的肥皂剧的演员们
'the BBC have launched their new soap
都会蒙住脸 穿纸做的衣服
'where viewers will have to force their own meanings on to a show
无名街
BBC1套 每周四晚8点
演的情节全是模棱两可的
'where actors with blanked out faces and paper suits
所以观众可以自行赋予该剧自己的理解
'act out ambiguous plots.'
你要的那个 东西 我拿来了
I've got that "thing" you've asked for.
形容词 形容词 动词
Adjective, adjective, verb.
你们心里都知道我会怎么评价刚才那个
Well, you both know what I'm going to say about that.
你的评论逗笑我了
I am laughing at that comment.
我也是
I am laughing.
我自己也笑了
I am also laughing.
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