废柴舅舅（2014）

We can still kiss, though, can't we?
我们还是可以接吻的 对吧
I have to go!
我必须得走了
Argh! Ruby, wait!
啊 Ruby等等
What's going on? Is this an orgy?!
什么情况 群♥交♥吗
Get out!
出去
Roly, what is going on here?
Roly 这是怎么回事
What do you care? You're too busy with Bruce to understand!
你有什么好在乎的 你光顾着和Bruce搞在一起了
Bruce? What's he talking about?
Bruce 他在说什么
Sam and Bruce are shagging.
Sam和Bruce睡过了
Kids' imaginations!
孩子的想象力啊
Listen, Claire, I can explain everything. The thing is...
听着 Claire 我能解释 事情就是
that I'm going to run.
我要跑了
Ryan's going to propose.
Ryan要求婚了
How do you know? I can just feel it.
你怎么知道 我能感觉到
Like when you eat 12 packets of Maltesers
就像你吃了十二包麦提莎
and you know you're going to be sick.
然后你知道自己要生病了一样
You've eaten 12 packets of Maltesers?
你吃过十二包麦提莎
18's my record.
我的最高记录是十八包
That's what I get for watching the Buffy box set.
是我看<吸血鬼猎人巴菲>的时候达到的
You could do a lot worse than Ryan.
Ryan真的是个不错的男人
Yeah, I know.
是啊我知道
Ryan's nice and...
Ryan很善良 而且
Good, fun...
优秀 风趣
Safe.
有安全感
Safe is good.
安全感挺好
But I don't want to be safe.
但我不想要安全感
I want to be...
我想要
thrilled.
刺♥激♥
Just once more...
只要再一次
.. before I'm locked away for good.
在我被永远禁锢之前
There.
呐
See?
看到没
Nothing ruined.
一切如故
Melodie?
Melodie
Ryan...
Ryan
Got it! Reservoir Dogs!
我知道了 是<落水狗>对吧
Ryan, it's not what it looks like!
Ryan 事情不是看起来这样的
Oh, really? Cos it looked a lot like you two were sucking face.
噢真的吗 因为看起来你们俩很像是在热吻
We weren't kissing,
我们不是在接吻
Alfie locked us in the storeroom
Alfie把我们锁在储物间里
and then I got a Skittle stuck down my throat.
然后水果糖卡在我喉咙了
Was it an orange one? God, I hate those guys.
是橙色的吗 天呐我可讨厌那些家伙了
You must think I'm stupid, Andy?
你一定觉得我很蠢吧 Andy
It's not like I didn't know there was a spark between you two
我不是没看见你们俩之间的火花
but I thought you were cooler than that.
但我以为你不会那么下作
How could you, man?
你怎么能这样呢老兄
And dressed as a character from my all-time favourite film.
而且还穿成我最喜欢的电影的角色
You know, I'm never going to be able to watch Blues Brothers again.
告诉你 我永远不会再看<福禄双霸天>
Yes!
太好了
Finally, somebody gets... It...
终于 有人看出来了
Bruce, are you slamming this bony bitch?
Bruce 你在睡这个瘦骨如柴的贱♥人♥吗
Hey! Aww, do you think I'm bony?
嘿 噢 你觉得我瘦吗
I was joking. They're not really together.
我是开玩笑的 他们没有真的在一起
Yes, they are. Who the fuck are you?
他们有 你♥他♥妈♥是谁
Claire. Who the fuck are you?
Claire 你♥他♥妈♥是谁
I'm Sam's brother.
我是Sam的弟弟
Hang on, you're Bruce's ex, Claire?
等等 你是Bruce的前任 Claire
And you think them two are together?
而且你觉得他们俩在一起
I think I would know if my sister was shacking up with Bruce.
我觉得如果我姐姐在和Bruce上♥床♥的话我会知道的
It's true.
是真的
Sorry I didn't tell you sooner, Claire.
抱歉我没有更早告诉你 Claire
But now that everything's out in the open,
但现在所有事情都公开了
hopefully we can handle this like adults.
希望我们能像成年人一样处理这件事
Yeah. Yeah.
是啊 是啊
Truce?
停战
Yeah, yeah?
来啊 来啊
Don't! You wouldn't dare. I've just had my roots done!
不 你敢 我刚染完发根
What on earth is going here?!
这里发生了什么事
Hi, Tiff.
嗨 Tiff
Hey.
嘿
I appreciate you sticking up for me before.
我很感激你之前为我出头
Especially considering...
尤其是考虑到
What?
什么
I just wanted to say thanks.
我只是想说谢谢
You're welcome.
不用谢
Haven't said thank you yet.
我还没说谢谢你呢
No matter how hard I try doing things right,
不管我多努力地做正确的事
I always end up with egg on my face.
最后总是有鸡蛋在我脸上
Or cupcake in your hair.
或者蛋糕在头发里
It's my fault.
是我的错
I should have been honest with Claire.
我应该诚实对待Claire的
I guess I'm just a malfunctioning robot.
我想我只是个故障的机器人
Somebody should probably give you a service then.
那就应该有人来把你修好
You're right,
你说得对
otherwise we might have a CAT-atsrophe on our hands.
不然我们可能就会有大灾难喵
Ow! Yeah?!
噢 是吧
Bruce, can you give us a minute?
Bruce 可以给我们点时间吗
Look, Claire. I just want to say, for my part,
听着 Claire 我只想说 我这方面呢
I didn't handle the situation well and I'm really sorry.
是我没有好好处理事情 很抱歉
Yeah. I really need to step back
是啊 在这之后我真的也需要
and take a good long look at myself after this too.
退一步然后好好审视一下自己
Really?
真的吗
No.
假的
Watch your back, bitch.
小心点 贱♥人♥
So, if you knew about your mum and Bruce...
既然你早就知道你妈和Bruce的事
.. why didn't you tell me?
为什么不告诉我
I figured you'd have a meltdown about it being weird between you and Bruce,
我觉得你会因为你和Bruce变得尴尬而崩溃
and make it all about yourself.
然后又扯到自己身上
Did you have your first kiss?
你得到初吻了吗
A gentleman never tells.
绅士从不多言
Yeah, but Blues Brothers don't keep secrets, do they?
是啊 但福禄双霸天不藏着秘密的 对吧
All right, then.
那好吧
Do you love Melodie?
你爱Melodie吗
You know...
你知道吗
.. next year, we should come as Ghostbusters.
下一年 我们应该扮成<捉鬼敢死队>
Great. Another film I haven't heard of.
太好了 又是一部我没听过的电影
Are the costumes for that wedgie-inducing as well?
那里面的服装也会卡着裆吗
Nah. Super baggy and comfortable.
不 超级宽松舒适的
Naturally, I'll be Bill Murray.
当然 我是Bill Murray
You'll be Harold Ramis, obviously.
你显然就会是Harold Ramis
And Bruce is going to have to be Ernie Hudson.
而Bruce就得是Ernie Hudson了
And Tiff is just going to have to live with being Aykroyd.
而Tiff就不得不当Aykroyd了