格拉夫斯（2016）

Like some mental patient.
这都在预计之内啊 奥利维亚
Predictably Olivia.
听着 总是会
Look, there's always,
有人说风凉话
always going to be someone to say something.
你只需要给自己一个答案就好
And the only person that you have to answer to is yourself.
我去看看我能不能早点下班
I'm gonna see if I can get off work early,
我觉得有个人你得见见
because I think there's someone you should meet.
欢迎回到到《和杰里米·格拉夫斯走近真♥相♥》
Welcome back to The Truth with Jeremy Graves
欢迎特别来宾格林·贝克
and special guest Glenn Beck.
我想说 杰里米 你这么毒舌
I am just saying, Jeremy, that your vitriol on TV
对全国性讨论毫无益处
is not helping the national conversation.
这根本就是发泄式的 "各执一词"
Because that's exactly the kind of angry
我后悔我曾经也这样过
"Us versus them" Rhetoric that I regret using.
如果我们的国家想继续繁荣昌盛
If our republic is gonna survive,
我们要站在统一战线
we're gonna need to find some common ground
来对抗那些阻碍民♥主♥发展的人
against those who threaten the fabric of our democracy.
好了好了 格林 请闭嘴 好吗?
OK, OK, OK, just shut up, Glenn, OK?
你想知道真♥相♥ 是嘛?
You wanna know the truth, huh?
好吧 继续
OK, all right, here we go.
真♥相♥就是我们生活在波及范围
The truth is, we're all just living on a
达三千英里的炸♥药♥桶上
3,000-mile-wide powder keg,
孩子们忍♥饥挨饿 人们每天被疯子
where kids go hungry and people are getting shot
用枪指着脑袋
every fucking day by psychopaths,
我们睡着什么也听不见 所以我们必须做出选择
and we just sleep through it, so we've got a choice.
我们是要选择继续忽视
We can either choose to continue ignoring it,
还是选择勇敢一点
or we can choose to grow a pair,
指责他们
point a goddamn finger,
点燃火柴 引爆♥炸♥弹!
light a match, and blow it the up!
马上回来
And we'll be right back.
拍摄结束
And we're clear.
杰里米 你知道嘛? 你是世界上最大的蠢货
You know what, Jeremy? You are the biggest ass on the planet.
谢谢您的夸奖
Praise from Caesar.
什么鬼?
What the fuck?
我是塔莎 我一会儿打电♥话♥给你
Hey, it's Tasha. I'll call you back.
塔莎 我是杰里米 我收到你的短♥信♥了
Tash, it's Jeremy. I got your text.
该死的
Really shitty.
我们... 我们需要谈一谈... 拜托了
Can we... We just need to talk about this... please.
你妹的
Fuck.
说实话 如果一个人发短♥信♥跟你分手会有多糟糕?
OK, honestly, how bad is it if someone text breaks up with you?
说实话? 没有比这更糟糕的了
Honestly? The worst.
你妹的!
Fuck!
女人总是爱说
You know how women say shit like,
"男生开车的时候好帅呀"
like, "It's so sexy when a guy is driven,"
或者是"权力和金钱哪个更吸引人?"
or, "Power and money is attractive"?
用这些问题来为难我
Well, then riddle me this.
问我之后
How come the fucking moment,
我取得了一些成就
the second, I achieve a modicum of success,
突然 就因为我没办法每天24小时陪着她
suddenly, 'cause I'm not available 24-fucking-seven anymore,
我女朋友跟我说
my girlfriend tells me,
"你不是我想选的那个人"
"You're not what I signed up for."
我是什么? 大学选修课吗?
What am I, a college elective?
真抱歉啊 我没有意识到你已经选了
I'm sorry, I didn't realize that you'd signed up
那个智障宝宝
for the depressed trust fund baby with PTSD.
我努力改变自己有多不容易啊
How rude of me to try and better myself.
而且这女孩的父亲还是个连环杀手
And this is a girl whose father is a serial killer, by the way.
我只是举个例子 你懂的 真是...
So just FYI, you know, it just, it really...
...一团乱麻
...it's just fucked up.
谢谢你在这么短的时间内飞过来 萨克斯先生
Thank you for flying in on such little notice, Mr. Sachs.
这是我的荣幸 格拉夫斯夫人 相信我
Oh, the pleasure's mine, Mrs. Graves, believe me.
好多了
Better.
这个 你和我 有意思
This, you, me, this is fun.
- 当然有意思 - 嗯哼?
- Define fun. - Hmm?
我想知道我给你带来了多少困扰 萨克斯先生
I need to know what the hell I've done to upset you, Mr. Sachs.
我有困扰吗?
Do I seem upset?
到处黑我 你似乎很享受啊
You seem to be enjoying yourself at my expense.
实事求是嘛 格拉夫斯夫人
I just call them like I see them, Mrs. Graves.
真的吗?
Really?
我来问你一个问题
Let me ask you something.
我为什么要投票给你?
Why should I vote for you?
因为我会去奋斗
Because I'm gonna fight.
我可以克服重重困难...
I've been through more battles than you ca...
不不不 拜托 我们都知道你是第♥一♥夫♥人♥
No, no, no, we all know you were First Lady. Come on.
我还是位母亲 我知道如何为人们...
And I'm a mother. I know what it's like for these people...
我快睡着了 两次
OK, I just fell asleep, two times.
听我说 你先生的过去让你想成为民♥主♥党
Listen, your husband's past burns you for liberals.
他的现在让你想成为共和党
His present burns you for conservatives.
你一点儿也不忠诚
You're not religious enough for the pious.
女人不会敬重你 因为你不独♥立♥
Women don't respect you because you're not your own person,
男人不喜欢你 因为你太专横
and men don't like a bossy lady.
但最重要的是
But more than any of that,
你知道你为什么会输吗?
do you know why you're gonna lose?
因为你觉得我说的都是错的
Because you think I'm wrong.
世界在变 政♥治♥在变
The world is changing, politics is changing,
而你就像恐龙一样
and you are a dinosaur
不知道自己为什么呼吸越来越困难
who's wondering why it's getting so hard to breathe.
在选举前夜
The night before the election?
和我谈一谈?
And you're talking to me?
你应该走出去 挨家挨户地敲门
You should be out there, knocking on doors,
求大家投你一票
pleading with people to vote for you,
而不是自以为是 觉得自己会完全胜出
not taking a goddamn thing for granted.
格拉夫斯夫人
Mrs. Graves.
格拉夫斯总统?
President Graves?
格拉夫斯总统 先生?
President Graves, sir?
不好意思?
Oh, uh, excuse me?
我找理查德·格拉夫斯
Uh, I'm looking for Richard Graves.
天呐 那真是个壮汉
Oh my God, that person's massive.
该死的
Oh, shit.
冷静 冷静
Calm down. Calm down.
先生?
Sir?
天呐 是以赛亚
Jesus, Isaiah.
我的天呐 你怎么这么脏
Oh, my God, you look filthy.
你是想像女学生一样站在这里
You just gonna stand there like some school girl,
还是进去暖和一下?
or are you gonna come on inside and get warm?
真不敢相信
I don't believe it.
先生
Sir.
- 在家中分娩? - 莉维 这是菲尼克斯
- A home birth? - Liv, meet Phoenix,
每位在家中分娩的
every pregnant woman's companion
孕妇都会选择的专业指导
for birthing in the comfort of your own home.
你是个产婆?
You're a doula?
传统意义上讲 做接生的都是女性
Traditionally, doulas are woman,
但我实在沉迷于协助新生儿诞生这项事业
but I felt drawn to the birthing game.
那你就是个助产小哥咯
You're a man doula then.
什么? 我父母就是这样做的
What? My parents did it.
选择了自然生产 没有借助任何药物
Natural birth, it's no meds,
没有任何医院协助 完全零外界力量
no hospital, predictability level, zero.
底线是 我要做陪产看护
Bottom line, I am a birthing companion.
我有七项按♥摩♥技术证书 还通晓金氏针压法
Certified in seven massage techniques and Jin Shin acupressure
一定能保证你在三次妊娠期间的每时每刻
to make sure you are continuously relaxed
都保持轻松愉悦的状态
throughout every moment of every trimester.
玛姬要气到中风
Maggie would have a stroke.
你所经历的 正是所有女性都会经历的最困难的事情
You are doing the hardest thing any woman will ever have to do.
独自一人 只有自己 这简直就超级操蛋了
All alone, by yourself, which is all kinds of fucked up.
但是你妈妈却想让你做剖腹产
But your mom wants you to have a C-section
只是因为她觉得你没有能力掌控生活
because she thinks that you can't handle life?
那就去证明她错了
Prove her wrong.
继续说
Go on.
谨以此誓证明 我将尽心尽力
I am dedicated by word and my oath
保证你能在家中安然生产
to give you the home birth you deserve.
你不再是独自一人了 奥利维亚
You are no longer alone, Olivia.
你是位坚强的女性
You are a strong woman,
而且你在生理上即将分娩