星期五晚餐（美版）（2024）

我天 他是戴假发了吗
Oh, my God. Is he wearing a wig?
就是 就是烫了
It's a, it's a perm.
是吧 因为他说自己想初中时有个新形象
Yeah, right? Cause he said he wanted a"new look"for middle school.
我可得仔细看看
I'm gonna need a closer look.
我天哪
Oh, my God.
哈维
Harvey.
我们要做爷爷奶奶了 -什么
－ We're gonna be grandparents. - What?
一二三
One...two...three.
我成功了
I did it!
我成功了 成功了
I did it. I did it.
不
Oh! No!
明早第一件事 哈维和我就带你去购物
First thing tomorrow morning, Harvey and I are gonna take you shopping.
我 我看见过一件小连体衣
I, oh, there was this little onesie that I saw.
上面写着 在我的摇篮里开趴
It says "Party at my crib. "
我一直想找个理由来
And I always wanted a reason to.
妈 -干嘛
Mom. What?
我得跟你们说实话了 好吗
I have to be honest with you. Okay?
事实是
The truth is
什么 大卫
What, David? tha
对啊 什么 大卫
Yeah. What, David?
我们需要买♥♥两件连体衣 因为是双胞胎
We're gonna need two of those onesies, 'cause it's twins.
双胞胎
Twins!
抱歉 我不 我不能 我来捋捋你们俩这事哈
Sorry, I can't. I can't. Let me just, let me wrap my head around this.
你们俩是咋着 订婚了吗 没有戒指啊
What are you, engaged? Cause I don't see a ring.
我们吗 当然啊
Oh, us? Absolutely.
我们 我们打算订婚呢
We are, we're planning to get engaged.
太姥姥赛迪的订婚戒指 我天
Great- Grandma Sadie's engagement ring! Oh, God.
你肯定会吓一跳的
You're gonna shit yourself.
我天
Oh, my God.
珍
Jane!
珍
Jane!
珍
Jane!
我天
Oh, my God. - Oh!
我天 好了 好了 -珍 珍
－ Oh, my God. Okay. All right, all right. - Janel Jane!
太吓人了
That was scary.
我还卡在里面呢
I still stuck.
是嘛
Really?
因 -好吧 等一下哈
Yeah. - Okay, hold on.
我打给客服 -珍
Let me call the customer service number. - Jane.
N
What?
等你接通后把戒指放回去 我要留给你妹的儿子呢
You put that ring back where you got it. I saving that for your sister's son.
客服 有什么能帮您的
Customer service. How can I help? - Uh...
他要娶那个可爱的犹太女孩了
He gonna marry a nice Jewish girl, you know.
女士 喂
Ma'am? Hello? - Um
天 该死 -喂
－ Oh, gosh darn it, it's...Hello?
又是烦人的等待音乐 他们说要
...stupid hold music. They said it's gonna...
你把戒指放回去
You put that ring back. - Um
什么 -坐稳了哈 我马上回来
What? - Just sit tight. I'll be right back.
给 电子烟 抽吧你
Here. There. Vape. Vape away.
祝你愉 -啊 我放那了哈
And have a nice time in...Ooh, there, I put it there.
珍 你没有放回去 我看见了
Janel You did not put that back! I saw you!
你为什么没告诉我你怀孕了啊 -那是你的问题 不是我的
Why didn't you tell me you were pregnant? - That's your problem, not mine.
我的价格要翻番了 -什么
My rate just doubled again. - What?
我同意假扮你女友 可不是你韦婚妻
I agreed to pose as your girlfriend, not your fiancee.
我 -你欠我1000了
I, uh...- You owe me 1, 000.
1000 我都没
1, 000? I barely
2000 双胞胎一人一千 -好了
2, 000. One for each twin. - Come on.
现在就微我 否则我就告诉你弟一切
Venmo me now, or I tell your brother everything.
不
No.
那也
That's...
真是操蛋了
This is bad.
克莉丝汀
Kristen. - Oh.
你能
Would you
他都哽咽了 真感人 我也很感动
He's emotional. So sweet. So am I
继续啊 大卫
Go on, David.
对 对
Yes, yes. Okay.
克莉丝汀 你愿意嫁给我吗
Kristen, will you marry me?
愿意 2000次愿意 谢谢
Yes. 2, 000 times, yes. Thank you. Oh, wow.
太好了 -太好了
Yes! Yes! - Ooh. Yes! Yes!
太棒了
Voila!
真漂亮 珍
It is gorgeous, Jane.
拜托 叫我妈吧
Oh, please, call me"Mom. "
妈 妈
Mom. Mom.
今晚还能更美好吗
Could tonight be more wonderful?
珍
Jane! - Oh.
哈维 不 你吃错了
Harvey, no, those are the wrong ones.
那些是辣鸡翅啊 -好辣
－ Oh, those are spicy. - Oh! Hot!
嘿 爸 看啊 她终于笑了
Hey, Dad. Look, you finally got a laugh.
我难受死了
I'm in serious pain.
我天
Oh, God.
这次我去开门吧
Oh! - Why don't I get it this time?
哈维 你没事吧
Harvey, are you okay?
克莉丝汀 -嗨 大卫
Kristen. Hi, David.
我在灌木丛里找到了这个披萨
I found this pizza in the bushes.
你怎么来了
What are you doing here?
我改变主意了 大卫 我准备好了
I changed my mind, David. I'm ready.
是啊
Word.
嘿 我现在不方便说话
Hey, I can't really talk right now.
不是 我没事 只是出来赚个外快
No, I'm good. Just out here making dollars.
你想跟宝宝说话吗
You wanna speak to your baby?
跟爸爸打个招呼吧
Say hi to Daddy.
从来都不是你的问题
It wasn't really ever about you.
自从我父亲离开了我们
Ever since my father walked out...
我知道 我知道
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
大卫 过来
David. Come here.
嘿 不 嘿 爸 我正忙着呢
Hey, no, hey, Dad, I'm the middle of something here.
是 我来处理吧
Yeah, I can handle that.
小姐 我们的邻居等那披萨一晚上了
Miss, our neighbor's been waiting for that pizza all night.
就在街对面 街对面 拿上你的披萨
Across the street. Across the street. Take your pizza.
好吧
Uh, okay.
好了 儿子 有件事你得知道
AII right. Son, there's something you need to know.
天 我真不知道要怎么说
Oh, God, I don't know how to tell you this.
我是要直接跟你说 还是婉转一点
Do I just give it to you straight, do I candy coat
稍等 稍等 -嘿
Hold on, hold on. - Hey, uh
你得吃片胃药 爸 不然 -好吧 这样
You need a Tums, Dad, or- Okay, you know what?
我就直接告诉你吧 不再遮遮掩掩的了 大卫
You know what? Rip the bandage off, I'm just gonna tell you, David.
你击婚妻怀的是别人的私生子
Your fiancee is knocked up with some other dude's love child.
未婚妻
Fiancee?
私生子 什么 -嗯
Love child? What? - Yeah.
不不不 不是
No, no, no. [huffs〕No.
给我解释一下
Start explaining.
现在 大卫
Now, David.
我说 你敢跟我男人用这种语气说话
Excuse me? You gonna speak to my man like that?
嘿 嘿
Hey, hey. Whoa, whoa.
别这样 别这样
Come on. Come on.
你解释我都不想听 天
I don't even wanna know. Oh, my God.
这就对了 跑吧 婊♥子♥ -不
Yeah, run, bitch. - No!
克莉丝汀 你听我解释 拜托了
Kristen, please let me explain. Please.
哈维 这是怎么回事啊
Harvey, what is happening?
从我刚刚得到的信息
Well, uh, from what I gleaned so far,
那个送披萨的姑娘也叫克莉丝汀
the pizza girl's also named Kristen.
晚安了 大家伙儿 还挺开心的 -我天
Goodnight, everybody. It's been fun. - Oh, my God.
大卫
David?
所有人
Everyone, uh
这才是真的克莉丝汀
This is the real Kristen.
我就知道 兄嗨 我知道你根本配不上她
I knew it, dude! I knew she was too good for you.
无意冒犯 -好吧 无所谓了
No offense. - Okay. It doesn't matter.
克莉丝汀 克莉丝汀
Kristen. Kristen. Um...
拜托 拜托你哪也别去
Please, please, don't go anywhere.
不如你留下啊 跟我们一起
Just, why don't you stay. Stay with us.