雷殛元首（2025）

快点
Come on.
真♥他♥妈♥没用！
Fucking useless.
嘿
Hey, hey.
Come on.
快点 混♥蛋♥ 操
Come on, you son of a bitch.
操
Fuck.
Any old storm, any old port
Life is long, love is short
You'd better get a woman Get a woman if you can
If you can't get a woman Get a clean old man
Do they hang too low? Do they swing to and fro?
Can you tie 'em in a knot? Can you tie 'em in a bow?
Swing 'em round your shoulder Like European soldier?
Do they hang too low in the mornin'?
Any old storm, any old port
Life is long, love is short
You'd better get a woman Get a woman if you can
If you can't get a woman Get a clean old man
天啊！
现在请大家讨论一下
I'd like to open up the floor to deliberations.
我想讨论一下查尔斯兄弟的事
I would like to deliberate on the topic of Brother Charles.
对 我也想谈谈查尔斯兄弟这个话题
Yes, I too would like to speak on the subject of Brother Charles.
我们非得每周都这样吗？
Must we do this every single week?
查尔斯 只有学会接纳同伴
Charles, it is only through the practice of receiving our peers
才有望获得心灵上的升华
that we can hope to achieve spiritual perfection.
他的行为令人颇为担忧
His behavior has been a matter of grave concern.
他常说合作社的坏话 吃饭时总是多吃多占
He'll often speak ill of the cooperative, take more than his fair share at meals.
他在暖房♥里偷♥窥♥约瑟夫和我 被我逮了个正着
I caught him spying with lust upon Joseph and I in the greenhouse.
艾丝特 你♥他♥妈♥做梦吧
Esther, you fucking wish. - Charles!
查尔斯！
恕我冒昧 诺伊斯长老
With deference, Elder Noyes,
我不会坐视不管 让自己的名声遭受诋毁
I will not stand by idly and accept this slander on my name,
我已向神宣誓 绝不会姑息这种行为
not when I have pledged myself to God as I have.
过去五年来 这个教会给了你安身之所
Do you doubt the principles of our community,
你却质疑我们社区的原则？
this church that's given you a home these past five years?
我承认我担心 自♥由♥恋爱文化变得有悖常理了 对
I'll admit, I-I-I fear that the culture of free love has grown perverse, yes.
没有任何姐妹愿意和他共同体验 他只是很难过而已
He's just upset none of the sisters will share an experience with him.
真是这样吗？ 你们当中就没人想了解这个人？
Is that true? Have not one of you had a desire to know this man?
先生 他们给查尔斯兄弟起了个绰号♥
They've devised a nickname, sir, with regard to Brother Charles.
什么绰号♥？
What sort of nickname?
“查理滚蛋”
"Charlie Get-Out."
我宁愿不被爱
I would sooner not be loved than by any of you harlots or sinners.
也不要你们这些婊♥子♥和罪人爱我
我误以为自己在这种地方能开悟
I made a mistake thinking I could ever reach enlightenment at a place like this.
干卑贱的农活 随便跟人乱搞 这群人或许会满足于此
Menial farm work and-and-and casual fucking may satisfy this bunch,
但我的命运远不止如此
but there is a greater destiny out there for me.
记住我的话
Mark my words.
总有一天 我的名字会举国尽知
My name will be known one day all across this country.
尽管笑吧
Laugh away.
但记住 笑到最后的人最开心
But remember, he who laughs last, laughs best.
I'll be glad when you're dead You rascal, you
《雷殛元首》
（史密森学会 美国古物陈列馆）
（1881年3月4日 就职之夜）
（詹姆斯·A·加菲尔德）
那是我神采奕奕的丈夫 - 对
Hmm?
There's my cheerful husband.
我们只待一个小时 我保证
We'll only stay an hour, I promise.
今夜你会大放异彩 好好享受吧
This is your night. Enjoy it.
总统先生
Mr. President.
加菲尔德夫人 - 道格拉斯先生
Mr. Douglass.
给你介绍一下来自密西西比州的 布兰奇·K·布鲁斯参议员
I'd like you to know Blanche K. Bruce, senator from Mississippi.
我们好像在芝加哥的大会上 有过一面之缘
Oh, I believe we met briefly in Chicago at the convention.
我没记错的话 你当时支持格兰特
You were for Grant, if memory serves.
我可不敢否认这一点
I will not dare deny it.
我所代表的群体不能冒险 把所有筹码押在不被看好的人身上
Those I represent cannot afford to lay all their chips on an underdog.
如果我面临同样处境 可能也会做出同样的选择
Were I faced with your stakes, I probably would have made the same bet.
就既往不咎吧
Let it be water under the bridge.
Ah.
我很钦佩你在竞选期间的豪言壮语
I admired your strong words during the campaign.
我只希望 你能把一切落实到更有力的行动上
I only hope they will be paired with even stronger action.
在南方 黑人们冒着极大的危险 为你坚守阵地
The Black man held the line for you in the South, and at his own peril.
无需我提醒 正是因为他们的付出 我们今晚才能举杯同庆
I needn't remind you just on whose tab we owe our champagne tonight.
我没忘
I haven't forgotten.
我们的政♥府♥ 将完全由进步人士、合格人才组成…
Our administration will be staffed solely with the most progressive, qualified of--
各位老兄 你们好 我喝醉了
Greetings, you bastards.
副总统先生 想喝点什么？
I am skunked.
Your drink of choice, Mr. Vice President?
香肠！
Sausages!
布莱恩参议员
Senator Blaine. Mrs. Garfield. - Oh!
加菲尔德夫人
克丽特 你见过凯特·斯普拉格吗？
Crete, have you met Kate Sprague?
没正式见过 但我久仰大名
Not in the official sense, but I've heard truly impressive things.
斯普拉格夫人 州长今晚也会来城里吗？
Mrs. Sprague, will the governor be joining us in town tonight?
很遗憾 他有事耽搁了
Oh, he's detained, sadly. - Oh.
得返回罗得岛
Back in Rhode Island.
罗斯科好心提出陪我来参加舞会
Roscoe's graciously offered to escort me to the ball.
康克林参议员
I would be rude not to ask after your wife, Senator Conkling.
我若不问问尊夫人的情况 那就太失礼了
她在奥尔巴尼照看家里
She's minding the homestead up in Albany.
茱莉娅不太喜欢南方的气候
The climate this far south never much agreed with Julia.
总统先生
Mr. President. - Oh…
失陪了 先生们 斯普拉格夫人
Would you excuse me, gentlemen?
加菲尔德夫人
Mrs. Sprague.
Mrs. Garfield.
很高兴请你出来社交 老布 大家都很想你
Good to have you out and about, Blainsy. You've been sorely missed.
罗斯科 像咱俩这样的无良政客
Political cockroaches like you and I, Roscoe, we can only stay in exile so long.
不可能一直待在暗处
你喜欢总统的演讲吗？ - 简直是煽情的杂耍表演
Did you enjoy the president's speech? - Bleeding heart vaudeville.
大谈改革 在媒体上大博美名
Crow on about reforms, fetch good press.
可能还是有几分真诚的
I suspect some of it may be sincere.
是啊 我才不在乎
Yeah, well, I could give a fuck.
你最好提醒加菲尔德 谁在关键时刻拯救了他的竞选
You'd better remind our man Garfield just who it was
that saved his campaign at the 11th hour
他当时还在俄亥俄干农活
while he was off slinging pig shit in Ohio and you were licking your wounds.
你们还没从失败中缓过来
纽约可不会免费做好事
New York doesn't work pro bono.
他爱怎么作秀都行 但应该记住我们的恩情
He can grandstand all he wants, but we expect to be remembered.
放松点 老布 我们赢了
Lighten up, Blainsey. Our side won.
罗斯科 我可以跳舞了
Roscoe, I'm ready to start dancing.
那就跳吧
Then dance we must.
斯普拉格夫人 代我向斯普拉格州长问好
Mrs. Sprague, give my best to Governor Sprague.
Oh.
我就喜欢老头子说尖酸刻薄的话
I love it when old men are catty.
Oh. Here we are.
我帮你捡
谢谢 - 乐意效劳
Thank you. - Oh, happy to be of service.
那我就不知道你来这里做什么了
Then I don't know what you're doing here.
不知为何 这座城市 总是能激发出人性的丑恶面
Oh, this city still manages to bring out the worst in people somehow.
是因为穿得太正规了
I blame the formal attire.
穿这样的衣服 上厕所都困难
It makes it, uh, awfully difficult to use a toilet.
真好笑
That's funny.
你该穿个裙撑 然后再说
You should try on a bustle and then let's talk.
我不知道自己在想什么
I don't know what I was thinking.
我生来就不适合这种世界
I'm not built for this sort of world.
就像我姐常说的 世界由我们来塑造
Well, as my sister always likes to say, the world is what we make of it.
还没开始就放弃 那可不行
And there's no use giving up before we've even begun.
我好像还不知道你尊姓大名
Not sure I caught your name.
在下查尔斯·吉托
Charles Guiteau.
实际上 我很自豪地说 助尊夫登上总统之位 我也出了力
I'm proud to say I'm one of the men that helped make your husband president.
Oh.
对
Yes.
这就说得通了
That makes much more sense.
说到这个 我该去找他了
Speaking of which, I ought to hunt him down.
不 等等
Oh, no, wait, wait, wait.
抱歉 不 我不是…
Oh, oh, sorry. No, no, I'm not, I'm not--
我只是…想单独见见他
I just-- I-I-I-I would love a moment with him is all.
竞选已经结束 我看看自己还能否帮上忙
To conduct a post-mortem on the campaign to see if I can be of further help to him.
可以吗？
Please?
我一定会转告他
I will be sure to let him know.
祝你今晚愉快 吉托先生 - 女士
Have a nice evening, Mr. Guiteau. - Ma'am.
（亚伯拉罕·林肯的高顶礼帽）
因为这双鞋看起来如此整洁
那双金色拖鞋！
Oh, them golden slippers!
那双金色拖鞋！
Oh, them golden slippers!
阿瑟副总统 先生！
Oh, Mr. Vice President Arthur, sir!
嘿！
Hey!
11月时 我们让那些家伙 尝到了厉害 对吧 老朋友？
We really gave those devils a taste of our medicine back in November,