阿尔玛不是一般人

她眼睛长那样 还能出♥卖♥♥♥色相
Surprised she gets the work with that eye.
她已经治好了
She's had it fixed.
我听说她一小时能赚250镑
I heard she earns £250 an hour.
老天 我的妈呀
God! Bloody hell!
我时薪只有7.5镑
I'm on £7.50.
-你还得戴上那顶丑哭的帽子 -我知道
- And you've got to wear that hat. - I know.
老天 如果你是三陪女
God, if you were an escort,
进去 一小时 拍拍一个男人的蛋
go in, one hour, slap a man on the balls,
假装是他妈妈 就完事了 拿着250镑走人
pretend to be his mother, 250 quid, you'd be done.
但我做不到
I couldn't do it, though.
我也做不到
No, me neither.
毕竟我的左奶♥子♥无精打采的
Not with my depressed left breast.
人人都有一边的奶♥子♥比较没精神
Everyone's got one low-energy breast.
我的奶♥子♥上还长了根毛
Mine's got a hair on it.
我的也是 又黑又硬
Me too! Black. Wiry.
听着
So listen...
我需要和你谈谈
I need to talk to you.
昨天安来餐馆了
So, Ann came in the caff yesterday,
她和我聊了起来
she starts chatting to me,
她告诉我 她听说...
and she tells me that apparently...
梅兰妮怀孕了
Melanie's pregnant.
他们要把孩子生下来
And they're keeping it.
搞毛啊
What the fuck?
是啊
I know.
我就是不明白 因为我...
I just don't understand, because I...
听着 这对你来说简直棒极了好吗
Listen! This is the best thing that could have happened to you.
现在你终于可以放下 向前迈进了
Now you can finally move on.
去哪儿 有什么目标
To where? To what?
才不是
Ooft, no.
我们烂醉一场吧
Shall we get shit-faced?
卡拉OK之夜
Karaoke night!
不 我还是回家吧
No, I should probably go home.
明早要...
Got an early...
♪告诉我你想要什么 告诉我你真正想要的♪
♪Tell me what you want, what you really really want♪
♪告诉我你想要什么 告诉我你真正想要的♪
♪Tell me what you want, what you really really want♪
♪告诉我你想要什么 告诉我你真正想要的♪
♪Tell me what you want, what you really really want♪
♪如果你想要我的未来♪
♪If you want my future,♪
♪就忘了我的过去♪
♪forget my past♪
♪如果你想跟我做♥爱♥♪
♪If you wanna get with me,♪
♪那最好速战速决♪
♪better make it fast♪
好了 女士们先生们 接下来有请莉安
All right, ladies and gents, it's Leanne.
她超凡绝伦
She's phenomenal!
♪是时候告别了♪
♪Time to say goodbye♪
♪我从未与你分享过的国家♪
♪Paesi che non ho mai♪
♪不不 它们已不存在♪
♪No, no, non esistono piu♪
♪是时候告别了♪
♪It's time to say goodbye♪
真的彻底结束了
It's really over.
他要有孩子了
He's having a baby!
他们要组建一个家庭了
They're having a family!
他们现在是一个家庭了
They're a family now!
我却还是孤单一人
And I'm on me own!
我完全孤单无依 格伦
I'm completely alone, Glen!
我叫乔夫
It's Geoff.
这名字完全不适合你 格伦
That doesn't suit you at all, Glen.
♪我的太阳 你常伴我身边♪
♪ Mio sole, tu sei qui con me, con me...♪
你那首歌♥唱得太绝了 宝贝
You absolutely smashed that song, babe.
我知道
I know.
我觉得那是我原始的性能量
I think it's my raw sexual energy.
你也一样啊
So did you.
一如既往地如天鹅般优雅
Grace of a swan, as always.
嗨 宝贝
Hi, babes!
你们好啊 姑娘们
Hello, ladies.
格伦 我是不会跟你上♥床♥的
Oh, Glen, I'm not going to shag you.
好吧
Fair enough.
快看
Look!
那是「眨眼安」
There's Winky Ann!
天呐 你说得对
Bloody hell, you're right!
天呐 她的眼睛好美
God, her eye looks great!
是啊 这项投资太值了
Yeah, good investment, that.
我需要有属于自己的钱
Oh, I need my own money, me.
不 现在我独♥立♥了 我要把一切问题都解决
No, I'm going to sort everything out now I'm on me own.
我要找到演艺方面的工作
And I'm going to get some acting work
我要把家里的破事解决
and I'm going to sort my family out,
然后我要找到一份真正的工作
and then I'm going to get a real job.
我要学西班牙语
You know, I'm going to learn Spanish...
我觉得我要学踢踏舞
I think I'm going to start tap-dancing.
你还是先找到份工作再说吧
Maybe just start with a job first, eh?
好吧
Yeah.
做什么呢
Doing what?
你有什么技能
Well, what skills do you have?
我可以用左奶♥子♥夹住一瓶
I can hold a three-litre bottle of cider
三公升容量的苹果酒 完全不用手
under my left tit with no hands.
恐怕这种技能没办法变现 宝贝
I don't think that's a transferable skill, babe.
绝对出乎你的意料
You'd be surprised.
你看上去糟透了
You look like shit!
-你还好吧 -不 不怎么好
- Are you all right? - Not really, no.
安东尼跟他那个小女朋友要有孩子了
Anthony's having a baby with his foetus of a girlfriend.
我付不起我的房♥租
I can't afford my rent.
妈妈一团糟
Mum's a mess.
我宿醉得快要死了
I'm hanging out my arse.
你试过改变下风水吗
You tried feng "Suey"?
-什么 -你把家里的家具变换下位置
- What? - You move all your furniture around
就能去除负能量
and it gets rid of the negative vibes.
那个蛋糕模具我就变了下位置
I did it with that cake tin.
以前是放在那边的
See, it used to be over there.
那真的让人很压抑
It was very oppressive.
恐怕移♥动♥蛋糕模具并不会有用 外婆
I don't think moving a fucking cake tin's going to cut it, Grandma.
不过放那确实挺不错的
It does look good, though.
听着 我给我妈安排了今天的游玩
Listen, I've booked a trip for Mum today.
我打算利用她的出院假期带她去女王公园
I'm going to use some of her leave to take her to Queen's Park.
我真的非常希望你也能跟我们一起去
And I'd really love it if you came with me.
不 你怎么敢开这个口
No. No. How dare you ask?
拜托了
Look, please!
我觉得我们应该更努力地成为相爱的一家人
I think we need to be better at trying to be some sort of a family.
我知道那是我所需要的
I know that's what I need.
我真的很希望你今天跟我一起去
I really want you to come with me today.
我买♥♥了馅饼
I bought pasties.
是吗
Have you?
是的
Yeah.
在老店买♥♥的
Ye Olde's as well.
但除非你今天跟我一起去 否则你别想吃到
But you can't have any unless you come with me today.
你真的很会操纵人
That is very manipulative of you.
是啊
Yeah.
我知道
I know.
我的天呐
Bloody hell!
过了五年 你终于来见我了
You finally made it after five years.
怎么了 你是不小心迷路了吗
What happened, did you get lost?
我给你买♥♥了这个
I bought you these.
那他妈是什么鬼东西
What the bloody hell are them?
你是想让我打扮得跟妖怪一样吗
Are you trying to make me look like a goblin, or what?
我觉得你本来就搞得跟妖怪一样
I think you do that quite successfully yourself.
给
Here.
好了 谁饿了
Right, who's hungry?
有什么软的糕点吗
Is there owt soft in there?
我可吃不了脆的
I can't do crusts.
给
There you go.
妈的 风水这东西
Feng fucking "Suey"!
三明治艺术家
你好 我想在你们公♥司♥工作
Hello there, erm, I'm interested in working for your company...
我工作非常努力 我很擅长与人打交道
I'm a hard worker, I'm great with people and...
成为三陪女