幕后危机（2005）

非常抱歉 我把你们都吵醒了 詹姆斯
I'm very sorry
I woke everybody up, James.
没关系 我们可以给孩子们耳塞
Well, we could always
give the kids earplugs, you know,
或者镇静剂 无副作用的大剂量的镇静剂
or sedate them.
Maybe a bit of friendly heavy sedation.
胡说八道 两腿套袋跑比赛第一名
Oh, bollocks! "First in the Sack race."
而且还大写了套袋跑（解雇）一词
And they've capitalised "sack",
不让别人认为我是好的赛跑者 而是要被解雇了
just in case anybody thought it was a
piece about what a good sack-racer I am.
(CAR DOOR OPENING)
看 走吧 我被人劫车了
- Look!
- Gotta go, I am being car-jacked.
-被一个苏格兰人 劫车了
- By a Jock. Car-jocked.
-我跟我的宽带运营商
- I'm actually very happy
聊得很开心
with my broadband provider, yeah.
在那个时间同时还有别的会议
There were other meetings
round about that time
我需要所有的资料
and I need to see all of those.
格伦 你能把有订书钉的文件放入碎纸机吗
Glenn, can you put stuff with staples
through a shredder?
不行
No!
你可以的 你都粉碎过信♥用♥卡♥
TERRl: Yes you can,
it does credit cards.
谁把这个消息告诉尼克拉
Who is going to break the news
to Nicola?
我去做 我自己去通知她
I'm going to do that
and I'm going to do it alone.
我刚给她了一个简要的提示
I'm just going to give her
the pre-briefing, right?
我用负面报道和公文蒙住了她的眼睛 你们做剩下的
I'm just gonna blind her
with bad press and bumph. You do the...
-是的 -不不不
GLENN: Yes.
TERRl: No, no.
-一坨屎
- GLENN: The full crock of shit.
-脖子后面
- Back of the neck.
你看到这个双腿布袋跑的新闻了
你肯定看见了
You've seen the sack race thing,
I suppose. Yeah, there it is.
一点都不好笑 报道的也不对 我其实是第四
It's not funny! It's not even accurate,
because technically I was fourth.
那又怎样呢 他们其实要写 在布袋跑中的第四名吗
So, really, they should have said,
"Fourth in the Sack race."
我觉得我们应该跟报业投诉委员会投诉他们
I think we should complain to the PCC.
听着 别担心了 首相不会一周之后把你解雇的
Look, stop worrying. The PM
is not going to sack you after a week.
12个月之后解雇你 显得你很差劲
Sacked after 12 months,
looks like you've fucked up.
一周之后就解雇你 就显得他很差劲了
Sacked after a week,
looks like he's fucked up.
所以我还不算干的太坏 对吧
And I'm not doing terribly, am I?
我喜欢他们用喷砂清扫的方式 显得特别干净
I love the way that they've sandblasted
everything around here. It's so clean!
罗宾 你没有时间来粉碎这些了
TERRl: Robyn, you've got no time
to shred those.
扔到厕所去或者别的地方
Please take them to the lavatory
or something.
格伦 她刚才是说扔到厕所去吗
- Glenn. Did she just say take them to the lavatory?
你们要在那这样站着吗
- Are you going to stand there like that?
-是 -你俩好像刚举办完婚礼
- BOTH: Yes!
- You look like the end of a wedding.
-你要不要再搭配一个拱形门廊 就更像了 -赶紧去找她吧
- Are you going to give her an arch?
- Just go and get her!
她肯定猜不到哪里出错了 傻叉
She'll never guess
there's anything wrong. Fucking idiot.
我只想让人们知道真实的我
I'd just like people to get to know
the real me.
你知道吗 我感觉好我好像有一点...
You know, I feel like
I'm coming across as a bit...
我不知道怎么说
Oh, I don't know.
-闷闷不乐 - 自以为是？
- Glum.
- Smug?
-自以为是？-是啊
- Smug?
- Yeah, you're coming across
跟闷闷不乐相比 你更显得自以为是
more smug than glum.
其实在我的外表下 我是一个很有趣的人
'Cause I am actually quite a fun person,
underneath all of this.
我有很多朋友
I've got loads of friends.
好吧 我相信你有很多朋友
Well, I'm sure you have,
但问题是 当你说这些东西的时候
but the trouble is
when you say something like that,
听上去就有些自以为是
it sounds a wee bit smug.
你能把车停这吗
MALCOLM: Could you just pull in
over here?
这样你们进去就把那个骑车的挤出来了
And you can take out that cyclist
as you're going,
他应该是一个影子大臣
I think he's Shadow Cabinet.
(WHISPERING APOLOGETICALLY)
明天你能在门口接我吗
Could you meet me at the door tomorrow?
-对不起 -沉得跟拿着两个冰箱一样
- Oh, sorry.
- It's like carrying two fridges in.
是的
Yes, of course. Yes...
我们要跟《卫报》那些人一起吃午餐
Right, so the lunch,
I've gone with the Guardian in the end,
我觉得跟邮报相比 卫报会更喜欢你
I thought maybe not The Mail,
they might be nice to your face
不会给你贴上男人都痛恨的欧洲荡♥妇♥的标签
but then brand you
a man-hating Euro-slag.
欧利 如果过你必须选择三个不好的形容词
Olly, if you had to choose
three nasty adjectives
来形容我 你会选择哪三个
that describe me, what would they be?
我没懂
- I'm sorry?
就是我刚跟马尔科姆聊天
- Well, I was just talking to Malcolm
他说了一个贬义词 我以前从来没想到过
and he mentioned a pejorative word
which I hadn't thought of before,
所以我好奇你会选择哪些词形容我
so I'm just keen to get your take.
-好吧 最讨厌的形容词 三个 -对
- Okay, top three?
- Yeah.
呃
Um...
尖酸
Sour?
好吧
Oh, okay.
乏味 还有
Frumpy. And...
易怒
uptight?
好吧
Yeah, okay.
为什么不是鸡蛋和勺子呢
NICOLA: I mean, why not egg and spoon?
鸡蛋和勺子可能比布袋跑更好
Egg and spoon would
have been better than sack.
但是脸上有鸡蛋
Yeah but, you know. "Egg on face."
她必须快点用勺子舀出来
"She must go spooner rather than later."
如果你掉了勺子会怎样 ...
What if you'd dropped it?
"Yolk-o Oh-no." You know...
-早 -部长早
- Morning.
- Secretary of State.
-有事吗 -刚发生了很麻烦的事
- Yes?
- Something terrible has happened.
哦泰瑞 干得漂亮
Oh, lovely, Terri. Beautifully finessed.
-什么事？ -我的职责是给你建议
- What?
- It's my duty to advise you
根据数据保护♥法♥的附录
of appendix four of
the Data Protection Act's
以及政♥府♥部门的公告
advisory note to government departments.
听上去你要逮捕我一样 什么附录
Sounds like you're arresting me.
Appendix what?
闭嘴 我们问你话呢 姐姐
Shut it.
We'll ask the questions here, ma'am.
我以前当过警♥察♥
I was being a policewoman?
好吧 谁能简要地给我解释一下到底发生了什么
Look, somebody explain to me
in simple terms what has happened.
我现在好像进了一个字谜世界一样
'Cause at the moment I feel a bit like
I've wandered into a cryptic crossword
还是他妈的侏儒怪给的猜谜（格林童话的人物）
compiled by Rumpel-fucking-stiltskin.
基本上 每一个英国市民
Basically, every British citizen
七个半月以来刚到这的英国市民
who has arrived here
in the last seven and a half months...
(CLEARING THROAT)
他们的名字都被删除了
Their names have been wiped.
移♥民♥数据库是空白
The immigration database is blank.
卧♥槽♥
Oh, fuck.
卧♥槽♥ 这他妈的是大灾难啊
Oh, fuck. This is a fucking disaster.
最后的希望是欧利
Well, the last hope was that
Olly had it on that thing...
-欧利有一个记忆棒-记忆棒
- What, a memory stick.
- Stick.
我是因为看你要自残了才这么说的
Well, I only said it just 'cause you
looked like you were gonna self-harm.
这些名字总要去一个地方吧
I mean, they've got to be somewhere,
surely.
是的 但不会在那个抽屉里
Yeah, well, they're not
actually in that drawer.
把布洛芬找来 泰瑞
I'm getting Nurofen, Terri.