上班族妈妈

These are solid now. They're strong.
我们还有烤箱里的饼干
And we have... cookies in the oven.
不好意思 太烫了
Oh god, sorry, it's hot.
你能想象到住在这里什么样了吧 很棒的
You can almost picture living here, it's great.
12%已售
太棒了
Yes!
看看这景色
Look at this view!
美不美
Isn't it beautiful?
而且这些窗户非常坚固
And these windows are super strong.
明白我的意思了吧
See what I mean?
吓你一跳
Like ghost.
18%已售
我简直是热血沸腾了
I'm so fired up right now!
这窗户...
It's um...
我跟你说 这窗户坚不可摧
I'm telling you, it's impenetrable.
你瞧着
Look, just look.
太好喝了
oh, fuckin' yum!
你这次打电♥话♥来不会还要冷战吧
This isn't another silent treatment call, is it?
不 这是你丈夫打给你的有声电♥话♥
No, this is a vocal call from your husband
问问你返程航♥班♥是什么时候
checking in about that return flight home.
我...
Oh, uh, I um...
你订好了回来的航♥班♥了吧
You did book a return flight home?
-抱歉 -安妮
- I'm sorry. - Anne!
我想订来着 真的
I wanted to, I did!
凯特把我当牛一样用
Kate is working me like a dog.
我忙着去各种活动
I am slammed with appearances.
下一周我天天都要忙
Like, every day for the next week.
这都快成全职工作了
It's basically like a full-time job.
好吧 说到全职工作
Okay, yeah, speaking of full-time jobs,
我豁了出去才帮你在这里找了份全职工作
I stuck my neck out to get you yours here!
我知道 真的很抱歉
I know, and I'm sorry.
我只是非去参加这个愚蠢的巡回媒体发布会不可
Yeah, I just, I have to do this dumb press tour.
-莱昂内尔 -我正生闷气呢
- Lionel? - I'm stewing.
你有理由那么做
And that, and that is totally fair.
不过你还能继续维持后方稳定吗
But do you think that you can handle things on the home front?
就再坚持一下
Just a little bit longer?
好吧
Yeah. Fine.
我得挂了 爱丽丝的学校打来的
Hey, I gotta go, that's Alice's school.
我欠你一个大人情
Okay, I owe you so much.
确实如此
Yeah. Yeah, you do.
尼德骗子老师
如你们所见
And as you can see,
爱丽丝和本尼特在尼德迈尔老师的教室里
Alice and Bennett left quite a mark
留下了一个杰作啊
on Mr. Neidermeyer's classroom.
爱丽丝 为什么
Alice, why?
这是为了阻止谎言继续传播
It was to stop the spread of lies.
怎么 关于全球变暖的虚假宣传
What?! Global warming propaganda!
醒醒
Hello!
抱歉 你是说...他真的...
I'm, I'm sorry, are you-- is he actual--
刚刚那句话是只有我一个人听到了吗
Uh, am I the only one that just heard that?
这整件事显然是爱丽丝策划的
This incident is obviously Alice's doing.
我儿子不光是全优生
Not only is my son a straight-A student,
还是科克伦保守党委员会的主席
he is the president of the Cochrane Conservative Committee.
保守党委员会 你是想说...
Conservative Committee? Are you suggesting that...
你不相信气候变化吗
You don't believe in climate change?
你是这个意思吧 我是疯了吧
Is that what you're saying? Am I going crazy right now?
谁知道呢
I don't know!
我要是有个那样的老婆 我估计早就疯了
If I had a wife like yours, I'd certainly lose my mind.
注意措辞 手链女
Watch your mouth, bracelets.
爸爸 本尼特说的话其实很有道理
You know, the things that Bennett says actually make a lot of sense, dad.
真的吗 你当真觉得他说的话很有道理吗
Do they? Do the things he says make a lot of sense?
是的
Yeah.
哪句有道理呢 比如说...
Like, what things? Like the...
不相信科学这种事吗
Like the not believing in science stuff?!
你眼睛瞪那么大干什么
Why are your eyes so wide?
你没听说过那些蜜蜂的事吗 爱丽丝
Have you heard nothing about the bees, Alice?
-蜜蜂啊 -不用我多说
- The bees! - Needless to say,
他俩都被停课两周
they are both suspended for two weeks.
我还以为你是个好人呢
I thought you were cool, man!
太傻了 对吧
That was stupid, huh?
被洗♥脑♥成这个样子
They're just so brainwashed.
听着 爱丽丝...
Look, Alice...
-我很喜欢你 -我也很喜欢你
- I like you a lot. - I like you a lot, too.
但我不喜欢跟你在一起时的那个自己
But I don't like who I am with you.
你说什么
What?
我不知道...我可能更喜欢
I don't know, I... I guess I just prefer my women
没那么复杂的女孩子
a little less complicated.
爱丽丝 赶紧上来
Alice, get in here,
免得他一会儿又要跟你说地球是平的了
before that boy convinces you that the earth is flat!
事实上 有许多证据显示...
Well, actually, there's a lot of evidence to suggest--
本尼特 别说了
Bennett! Stop talking.
我还是把这个拿回去吧
I should probably take this back.
快接啊 安妮 你在哪呢
Come on, Anne, where are you?
-等一下... -别说了
- But wait-- - Just stop.
这里是安妮 请留言
You've reached Anne, leave a message.
做♥爱♥啊
The love making!
老天爷 做♥爱♥啊
Oh my god, the love making.
我估计要栽在这儿了
This is it. This is my vietnam.
女的一到某个年龄
Oh, women of a certain age
就不被看作有性需求的生物了
are no longer seen as sexual beings.
我们像是被绝育的游魂
We're like neutered ghosts,
等着死亡带给我们甜蜜的解脱
just waiting for the sweet release of death.
所以 谢谢你 巴里 挑战了这一常规
So I thank you, Barry, for challenging that norm.
你唤醒了我的心
You've stirred my heart,
也唤醒了我的下身
and my loins.
-了不起啊 伙计们 -闭嘴吧 亚当
- Very cool, guys! - Shut up, Adam!
天啊
Jesus.
你在哪
克里斯汀爱死鼠女的主意了
我宣布你们结为夫妻
I now pronounce you husband and wife.
恭喜 伙计们 我走了
Mazel tov, guys! Buh-bye!
-姐们儿 来抱个 -离我远点
- Bring it in, sis! - Get away from me, man!
她还在吗 克里斯汀还在吗
Is she here? Is Kristen here?!
-早走了 -该死
- Long gone. - Dammit.
不过这次会面很愉快
It was a great meeting, though.
真的吗
Yeah?
她非常喜欢鼠女的点子
She was truly inspired by rat girl.
我猜她应该已经在狂磕褪黑素
I bet she's already popped some melatonin,
-把半本书的情节都想出来了 -靠
- and brainstormed half the book. - Shit.
你对《佩妮教你治害虫》的看法是对的
You were right about "Penny pest control."
这个系列绝对能做大
This franchise is gonna be huge.
对对 当然啦 是的
Yeah, no, no, of course, yeah, yeah,
有这么多大反派 无限可能啊
with all the villains, endless possibilities.
不过我在想
I was thinking though
鼠女对小孩来说会不会过于吓人了
that rat girl might be a little too scary for children, you know?
查理要是听到一个老鼠和女孩融合的故事
I mean, I know Charlie would crap himself at the idea
能吓的够呛
of a rat fused with a girl.
这真的很吓人啊
I mean, that is terrifying stuff.
但是 一个蜥蜴人律师
But, a lizard lawyer,
天 一定是个好反派
oh boy, that's a bad guy.
绝对是个刺♥激♥的大反派
That's an exciting bad guy.
还可以有许多其他的 比如...
And there's lots of others, you know, like a...
负鼠政客 大反派
Possum politician, bad guy there,
你不想跟他扯上关系的大坏蛋
that's a bad guy, you don't wanna mess with him.
我猜他肯定很酷
Bet he sways right.
酷到钻洞
Right into a hole!
洞里有他的午餐
where his lunch is.
-说完没 -完了
- You done? - Yeah.
天啊 你就接受吧
For god's sake, take the yes.
希望我们意见一致
I hope we don't have a problem here.
因为我已经和艺术部谈过了
Because I've already spoken to the art department,
我们说话这会儿他们正在画鼠女的草稿
and they're coming up with preliminary sketches of rat girl as we speak.
嗯嗯 没问题
Yeah, no, no problem.