舞台剧

麦克
Michael?
-麦克 -大卫
- Michael? - David!
-你还好吗 -等我一下
- You all right? - Give me a minute.
你在看什么
What are you looking at?
我担心我正身处于希区柯克的电影中
I worry that I'm in a Hitchcock film.
什么意思
What do you mean?
群鸟开始飞回塔尔伯特港了
The birds are coming back to Port Talbot.
这挺好的啊
That's nice.
那只大的蓝色雀鸟似乎是老大
And a large blue finch is the leader, it seems.
你还好吗
You all right?
我还在适应中 你还好吗
Just adjusting. You all right?
罗梅什·兰加纳坦的
半年隔离时光
-糟糕透顶 -糟糕透顶
- Cachu hwch! - Cachu hwch!
-糟糕透顶 糟糕透顶 -糟糕透顶
- Cachu hwch! Cachu hwch! - Cachu hwch!
真♥他♥妈♥的一塌糊涂
Total bloomin' disaster.
好了 跟刚进来的朋友介绍下
Look, for those of you just joining us,
欢迎各位来到我家
welcome to my house.
欢迎来到我家厨房♥
Welcome to my kitchen.
我已经被关在这里半年了
I've been in prison here for half a year.
说实话 我已经受够了视频通话
I'm done with Zoom, if I'm being honest with you.
但今天跟我一起的两位 却化腐朽为神奇
But I'm here now with two people who actually made it work,
麦克·辛和大卫·田纳特
Michael Sheen and David Tennant.
或者我该说 大卫·田纳特和麦克·辛
Or should that be David Tennant and Michael Sheen?
这里是《罗梅什·兰加纳坦的半年隔离时光》
This is Romesh Ranganathan's Six Months In Lockdown,
在这个节目中 我们会一起庆祝一些
a celebration of the wonderful things
带我们度过这个艰难时期的美好事物
that have basically got us through this challenging period.
麦克和大卫在此一起畅谈他们的新剧《舞台剧》
Michael and David are here to talk to us about their BBC show, Staged.
-谢邀 -很高兴能上这个节目
- Thank you for having us. - Lovely to be here.
当然 还有我们的老嘉宾 迈克尔·佩林爵士
And still with us, of course, Sir Michael Palin,
他曾在贝克特经典作品在线阅读会上等待过戈多
who waited for Godot in an online reading of the Beckett classic.
我一直想问 迈克尔爵士 戈多到底还会不会来
I meant to ask, Sir Michael, did Godot ever arrive?
没有
No, no.
我们仍在等待
We're still waiting.
在你等待期间 大卫和麦克
OK, well, while you wait, David and Michael,
十分欢迎你们来到我的节目
massive congratulations on the show.
-虽然合同规定我必须这么说 -谢谢
- I know I have to say that, contractually, - Thank you.
-但我也真是这么想的 这剧很有趣 -谢谢
- but genuinely, I mean it. Very funny. - Thanks very much. Cheers.
第一个问题 剧里哪些是真的 哪些不是
First question, I guess, is what's real and what's not?
例如 西蒙真的有那么蠢吗
Like, is Simon that much of an idiot?
没有吧...
N-Nooo...
没有...
No...
但麦克确实会冲鸟喊
Michael does shout at birds.
我的头发跟鸟窝似的 所以先兵后礼比较好
Well, I have a bird's nest for hair, so it helps to be courteous.
所以那都只是节目效果对吧
But it was a television show.
都只是节目效果 没错
It was a television show. Yes.
-那房♥子真的是西蒙妹妹的吗？ -不是
- So, I mean, does Simon's sister own that house? - No.
所以 你没写剧本 你妻子也没写小说
So what - no screenplay, no novel?
没有胡萝卜 没有菠萝 啥都没有
No carrots, no pineapples. None of it.
-但感觉很真实 -谢谢夸奖
- It did feel real. - Well, thank you very much.
有多少内容是你们即兴发挥的
How much of it was actually improvised?
全部都是
All of it.
确实有很多即兴发挥的成分
Well, that... That does come up a lot.
-所以你们有剧本吗 -有一些想法
- Was there actually a script, then? - There were...ideas.
然后 我们就自♥由♥发挥了
And then, you know, we would play around with it quite a lot.
但也不是所有的都剪进去了
Not...not everything made it into the cut, though.
是 还有好几个小时的素材没用
No, there are hours of footage somewhere,
在那些素材里我们表现得不是很好笑
of us not being particularly funny.
所以有什么被剪掉的精彩片段吗
So what gold did we lose to the cutting-room floor?
有一段 我记得很清楚
Well, there was one moment where, quite memorably,
大卫说我是个低配版迈克·亚伍德
David accused me of being a cut-price Mike Yarwood.
英国喜剧演员
这好笑吗
Is that funny?
不好笑
Well, no.
我都不知道迈克·亚伍德是谁
I don't think I actually know who Mike Yarwood is.
你看 我说的吧
You see? I told you, didn't I?
-我就说没人认识他 -我不信你
- I told you. - I don't believe you.
我不信 他可是喜剧泰斗
I don't believe... He's... He's a comedy titan!
罗梅什 大卫说的很多笑话
So, Romesh, most of David's contributions
讲的都是这种奇怪又晦涩的梗
were based on these sort of bizarre, obscure references.
是啊 所以才会被剪掉
Yeah. Well, that's why they're cut.
我的梗都太高级了 不适合黄金时段的观众
I'm a little too intellectual for primetime.
而且它们一点都不好笑
And not funny.
至少我没靠着懒洋洋的木偶模仿来博人一笑
Well, at least I didn't resort to lazy Muppet impressions, did I?
我的木偶秀一点也不懒洋洋好吗
There was nothing lazy about my Muppet!
我当时都累死了
I was exhausted!
你知道迈克·亚伍德是谁吗 迈克尔爵士
Do you know who Mike Yarwood is, Sir Michael?
嗯 其实我认识迈克·亚伍德
Yeah, I actually know Mike Yarwood.
真的吗 我都没意识到...他还在工作
Really? I didn't realise he was still, er...working.
我们再来看一个片段
Well, let's have another clip.
很好
Great.
好的
Lovely.
罗梅什·兰加纳坦的
半年隔离时光
-好了 开始放视频了 -好的
- And we're off. - Okay.
-你放的是哪一段 -饼干罐那段
- Which one is it? - It's, er, cookie jar.
我们已经玩过好多次了
We've seen them all quite a lot now.
我想也是
Yeah. I'm sure.
不过在这方面 迈克尔爵士应该比你们更有经验
I mean, I imagine Sir Michael's a step ahead there.
是的
Yes!
迈克尔爵士 你遇到过多少次死鹦鹉
Sir Michael, how many dead parrots do you reckon you've seen in your time?
此为巨蟒剧团的喜剧小品之一 由迈克·佩林出演
小品描绘了一个心怀不满的客户和一个宠物店店主之间的冲突
二者针锋相对辩论"挪威蓝"鹦鹉是否已死 并陷入语言游戏
该小品戏讽了英国文化中许多关于死亡的委婉语
多年来 佩林已在各种场合中进行了许多版本的"死鹦鹉"小品表演
好多次
Oh, a few!
死鹦鹉的集♥合♥名词是什么
What is the collective noun for dead parrots?
"挪威蓝"鹦鹉
A Norwegian blue.
下沉的峡湾
A sunken fjord!
在小品中 尽管店主被告知鹦鹉已经死了
但他仍然坚持这只鹦鹉只是"渴望着峡湾"或"被吓呆了"
金刚鹦鹉
A macaw.
迈克尔爵士 你觉得死鹦鹉的集♥合♥名词是什么
Sir Michael, any ideas, collective noun for dead parrots?
丢人现眼吗
A humiliation?
-你看过《舞台剧》吗 迈克尔爵士 -看了
- Have you seen Staged, Sir Michael? - Yeah.
-嗯 看了几集 -是吗 看了哪些
- Yeah, I watched a couple. - Have you? Which ones?
-第一集 -你喜欢吗
- The first one... - Did you like it?
我爱死了
Loved it.
-太好了 -谢天谢地
- Yeah! Great. - Thank goodness for that.
这剧很讨人喜欢
For what it was, you know.
欢迎回来
And we're back.
罗梅什·兰加纳坦的
半年隔离时光
刚刚说到 BBC1台隔离期间的喜剧《舞台剧》
That was BBC One's lockdown comedy Staged.
大卫和麦克 你们说故事本身是虚构的
David and Michael, you said the story is fictional,
但你们的角色呢
but what about your characters?
-全是编的 -和我们本人没有任何相似之处
- Total fabrication. - Nothing like us at all.
一丁点都没有
Not... Not a scintilla.
没有 我不觉得现实生活中的我们很有趣
No, I mean, I don't think we're very funny in real life.
-你很无趣 但我很有趣 -当然 确实如此
- Well, I don't think you're funny. I'm funny. - Sure, obviously.
我只是说 我们...我们不是喜剧演员
I just mean, we're not... we're not comedians.
你们还年轻 有无限可能呢
Ah, you're still young.
是啊
Yeah.
你们接下来有什么打算
And what's next for you guys?
我要开始正经工作了
I'm back to proper work, actually.
在封城之前 我参与的一部戏
A show that I was working on before lockdown,
已经重新开始运作了
is revving back up
-所以我准备去南非了 -很好
- so I'm off out to South Africa. - Very nice.
我们有过几次不成功的开始
We've had a couple of false starts,
但我觉得现在终于步入正轨了 我明天就要飞过去了
but I think this is finally it and I am flying tomorrow.
太棒了 麦克呢
Great. And Michael?
我不想再搞正经工作了
I don't do proper work any more.
所以我准备去纽约见家人朋友
So I'm off to New York to see family and friends.
嗯 现在纽约是允许去的 是吧
Right. Travel allowing, I imagine.
不 会没事的
Oh, no, it'll be fine.
-我相信 会没事的 -嗯嗯 当然了
- I believe. It will be fine. - Yeah, of course. Of course.