惊奇少女（2022）

终于到了大家翘首以盼的时刻
Finally, the moment everyone has been waiting for.
我的十集惊奇队长
The final chapter to my 10-part series
漫画的最后一章
on Earth's mightiest hero, Captain Marvel.
浩克重击
Hulk smash.
这一周我们要讲的是地球之战
This week, we're focusing on the battle of Earth.
故事大家已经耳熟能详了
Now we all know the story.
复仇者联盟拼尽全力拯救世界
The Avengers were trying to save the world,
但是说老实话
but if we're being honest here,
他们真的是一败涂地
they were losing, badly.
外星飞船入侵 灭霸为了无限原石坏事做尽
Alien ships invading, Thanos being a jerk about magical Stones.
我们的英雄要完蛋了
Our heroes were done for.
直到…
Until...
惊奇队长闪亮登场
Captain Marvel blasted in!
这个光芒四射 英姿飒爽的英雄 是何方神圣？
Now who was this glorious, well-coiffed hero?
根据我对斯科特·朗的播客访谈
Due to my extensive research and my diligent studying
深入细致的研究
of Scott Lang's podcast interviews,
这哥们还挺酷的
who seems like a pretty cool guy.
我知道了许多和惊奇队长有关的事
I've learned a lot about Captain Marvel
而且我可以确定三件事
and I know at least three things to be true.
一 她像烈焰天使一样冲进了灭霸的舰队
One, she blasted through Thanos's fleet like a flaming angel.
你知道吗？她简直酷极了
And you know what? She looked good doing it.
二 她狠狠地给灭霸脸上来了一拳
Two, she, like, punched Thanos right in the face.
你完蛋了
You're finished!
我没有冒犯其他复仇者的意思
No offence to any of the other Avengers,
但是我真的觉得他们没有这个实力
but I really don't think they could've done that.
三 在某个特定的时刻
And three, sometimes,
总有某个人 出其不意地出现 然后完成一系列壮举
someone can come out of nowhere and do something amazing.
我知道你们有些人会说
I know some of you think,
“她可是抛弃了地球人啊”
"Well, she abandoned the people of Earth."
但是那并不是真的
But look, it's not true.
当然我们并不知道她到底去哪了
Obviously we don't know exactly what she's been up to.
也许她就是去休息一下 对吗？
But maybe she just needed a break, you know?
一个女人就不能有自己的生活吗？
Can a woman just live, hmm?
新泽西 复仇者联盟展
也许在这周末的复仇者联盟展里 我们能了解到新的消息
Maybe we'll learn something new at AvengerCon this weekend.
当然 我肯定也会扮装成惊奇队长出现
I'm gonna be dressed as Captain Marvel. Obviously.
好了 这次就聊到这里了
Anyway, that's all I got for this week.
下周我要开始一个特别的上下集系列
Next week, I'm gonna kick off a special two-part series
来讲讲为什么我认为索尔 私底下是个游戏玩家
on why I think Thor is secretly a gamer.
记住 每周三我都会发布新视频的
Remember, new episodes drop every Wednesday.
别忘了点赞评论订阅树懒宝宝频道哦
Be sure to like, comment and subscribe at Sloth Baby Productions.
树懒宝宝制♥作♥
惊奇队长在哪里？ 理论部分 第10集
她去哪里了？
不知道啊这么棒的内容是谁做的 太厉害了
树懒宝宝制♥作♥
-卡玛拉·克汗 -来了 妈妈
-Kamala Khan. -Coming, Ammi.
快点 驾照考试快要晚了
Hurry up. You're going to be late for your driving test.
阿米尔 别再啰里啰唆地祷告了
Aamir, if you don't stop praying long enough
赶紧吃东西 否则你早晚有一天会饿死
to put some food in your mouth, one day you will starve to death.
愿真♥主♥安♥拉♥宽恕你
May Allah forgive you one day.
卡玛拉 别忘了至少15秒钟
Kamala, please don't forget to
看一次反光镜
look at the mirrors every 15 seconds at least.
知道了
Yes, yes, yes.
卡玛拉 我的卡玛拉 道路漫长 蜿蜒曲折
Oh, Kamala, my Kamala, the road is a long and winding one,
内心坚定 步履不停
so never fully stop at stop signs.
你这一大早就开始作诗了 爸爸
Way too early for poetry, Abbu.
好吧 听着
All right, listen.
你知道你并不需要 没完没了地看反光镜对吗？
You do know that you don't really have to look in the mirrors that often?
她得看
Yes, she does.
听着 只要保证考官 看见你扭头了就行 知道吗？
Listen, just make sure that the instructor can see you move your head, okay?
记得发动车以前默念“真♥主♥保佑”
And remember to say Bismallah before you start the car.
神灵会保佑你一切顺利的
You're gonna need all the help you can get.
我还没拿到驾照呢
Don't even have a license.
要不先把车子发动起来？
How about you start by turning the car on?
准备好了就开始吧
Pull out whenever you're ready.
真♥主♥保佑
Bismallah.
祝你好运
Bless you.
欢迎来到泽西市
还好没人看见
I don't think anyone saw.
那是我的车
That's my car.
《惊奇女士》
你肯定是故意让她考不过的
You set her up to fail,
竟然让她在这么多车的路上开车
having her drive in the street with all the other cars.
我可是手把手亲自教她的
I have taught her to drive myself.
女士 托您女儿的福 我只能走路回家了
Ma'am, because of your daughter, I'm walking home.
得了吧 你是跟我说
Oh, come on. Are you trying to tell me
她看反光镜的次数不够吗？
she didn't look in the mirrors enough for you and your clipboard?
这不是问题的关键
I wouldn't say that's the problem.
你是不是还要说你要求她 每次拐弯都要打转向灯？
Then you'll also say that you expected her to signal at every single turn?
是的
Yeah.
把钥匙给我
Give me my keys.
好了 卡玛拉 走吧
Okay, Kamala, come on. Chalo.
咱们家这辆车 这辆你父亲
I'm so sorry that this family car, you know, that your father earned
辛辛苦苦挣钱买♥♥的车 见证过的痛苦也不少了
with his very hard-earned money, it has seen a lot of trauma.
而且我很遗憾 你也不能
Hmm. I'm also sorry that you're not going to be able
像你答应我的那样
to help me with all the things
帮忙处理你哥哥婚礼的事了
for your brother's wedding you said you would.
这是我的错 这都是我的错 都是因为遗传啊
This is my fault. This is all my fault. These are my genetics.
我们家就是有 不切实际白日做梦的传统
I mean, I come from a long line of fantasizing, unrealistic daydreamers.
我母亲就是那样
My mother was one.
科尔斯学院高中
卡米拉 幸好你没在躲避球的时候受伤
Camelia, glad you're not bruising from that dodgeball incident.
她打什么招呼啊？真奇怪
Why is she waving? That's weird.
大家好
Hey, guys.
拜托让一下 我要拿我的化学书
I'm just gonna sneak in there and grab my chem text book.
我们正说话呢 等一下
We're in the middle of something. One sec.
那我上网去搜索元素周期表吧 没事
I'll google the periodic table. Yeah.
今天早上真是不顺
Rough morning all around.
我赌你能考过的 结果我输了10美元
Had a bet you were gonna pass, so now I'm out 10 bucks.
我和我妈说过 不要再给你们发消息了
I told my mom to stop texting you guys.
好多人都过不了驾照考试的
Plenty of people fail their driver's test.
那些考官太吹毛求疵了
Instructors focus on the tiniest things.
我把他的车撞了
I crashed my car into his car.
那就怨不得别人了
Oh. That's on you. Yeah. Uh...
-看来我们去不成复仇者展了 -那可不行 布鲁诺
-So I guess we're not going to AvengerCon. -No, no, no, Bruno.
这可是今年最大规模的粉丝活动上
A cosplay competition for Carol Danvers
卡罗尔·丹弗斯的变装大赛
at the greatest fan event of the year.
我的服装已经接近完美了 只差最后的配饰
My costume is near perfect, pending the final flourish.
还在纠结什么配饰吗？
Still trying to think of that flourish?
-灵感随时都可能出现 -但愿如此
-It'll come to me any second now. -Sure it will.
抱歉 我还是爱你的
I'm sorry. I really do love you.
这周末有安排吗？
Got any plans this weekend?
因为我和卡玛拉没事干了 就像现在一样
As of this morning, Kamala and I are free.
才没有
No.
你们要叫我一块玩《大乱斗》吗？
Are you inviting me to play Smash Bros?
-如果是的话 我没空 -不是我玩的不好 是那个游戏不好
-Because if so, I'm busy. -Don't hate the player, hate the game.
我就是觉得那个游戏不怎么样
The thing is I do hate the game, though.
不是吧？
Really?
-对不起 佐伊 -没事 没关系
-Sorry, Zoe. -It's fine.
你的外套不错
I like your jacket.
谢谢 你的项链也挺好
Thanks. I like your necklace.
谢谢
Thanks.
其实这是阿♥拉♥伯语的我的名字
It's actually my name in Arabic.
好吧 回头见
Okay, see you later.
如果我们要搭她的车 会不会很奇怪
Would it be super weird if we asked her for a ride to AvengerCon?
-会的 -为什么？
-Yes. -Why?
她妈妈过去也经常开车送我们上学啊
Her mom used to drive us to school all the time.
因为自从她有10万粉丝以后 她就开始招人讨厌了
Because she is the absolute worst now that she has 100,000 followers.
是8万
80,000.
卡玛拉·克汗 立刻来我的办公室
Kamala Khan, please come to my office ASAP.
你犯了非常严重的错误 开玩笑啦
You've done something very wrong. Just kidding. It is crazy that the
现在全校都能听得见
whole school can hear this.
其实没事 我就是想找你谈谈 快点过来
No, nothing is wrong. I just wanna chat. Can't wait.
-另外 我是威尔逊先生 -谢谢你 威尔逊先生