达格利什（2021）

你跟艾瑞克瑟提斯认识多久了
How long have you known Eric Surtees?
18个月左右
Eighteen months or so.
还不至于用情够深 愿意替对方出头
Not long, to have become so involved with someone that you decide to fight their battles for them.
你是指副主教的事吗
Mm. You mean the Archdeacon?
我说过了 我喝了伏特加 脾气很冲
As I told you, I'd had a vodka. Makes me feisty.
好吧
OK.
反正你们还是会找到我的笔记
You're gonna find my notes anyway.
我是一名记者
I'm a journalist.
独♥立♥调查记者
Investigative. Freelance.
爆出贝特顿的新闻后 我来到村子里
I came to stay in the village when the story about Betterton broke.
某晚在酒吧认识艾瑞克
I met Eric in the pub one night.
我们聊了起来
We got talking,
慢慢发展到现在
and that led to something else.
你利用他
You used him?
不是
No.
他很快就明白我的来意 我没否认
He soon realised why I was there. I didn't deny it.
我们是真的情投意合
We are actually into each other.
但你自称他的妹妹是为了通过门禁
But you claimed to be his sister to get through the gates?
设法混进学院
Have access to the college?
是 没错
Yes. I did.
我写过几十篇关于教会性♥虐♥事件的文章
I've written dozens of articles on sexual abuse in the Church.
投♥注♥大量心力
I put the work in.
教区杂♥志♥…
Parish magazines,
神父突然调职
priests suddenly moving on,
丑闻的风声
a whiff of scandal,
母婴之家的妇女
women in mother and baby homes.
很难引起全民关注
It's hard to get the nationals interested,
但偶尔还是有出色的报导
but once in a blue moon, something gets through.
贝特顿案之所以非比寻常
The Betterton case was unusual
是因为副主教在刑事调查行动背后施压
because the Archdeacon threw his weight behind a criminal investigation.
当时并未以刑事罪名起诉
No criminal charges were brought.
那个自杀的男孩…
The boy, the suicide,
18岁 没有证据-家长很确定
was 18. -There was no evidence. -The parents were sure.
那孩子有写日记的习惯 他太依恋贝特顿
The boy kept diaries. He was way too attached to Betterton.
而且他从14岁就进来就读
And he'd been a pupil here since he was 14.
就算什么事都没发生
So even if "nothing happened",
你会愿意让自己的孩子 被一个对他有性幻想的老师教吗
would you want your kids being taught by someone who has sexual fantasies about them?
我可不想
I wouldn't.
你想把孩子送到主日学
You wanna send your kid off to Sunday School,
以为那是一个对他们绝对安全的良好环境
thinking it's a safe, benign, positively good place for them to be,
却发现他们被毛手毛脚
then find out they'd been touched,
甚至更严重
or worse?
我们还只是触碰到皮毛
We're only just scratching the surface.
迟早会撼动教会的根基
Sooner or later, it's gonna rock the Church to its core.
你去找副主教时发生了什么事
What happened when you went in search of the Archdeacon?
我没有杀他 我何必
Well, I didn't kill him. Why would I?
我写信到他的办公室 要求采访他已经好几个月
I'd been writing to his office for months, asking for an interview.
却一直没回音 当他总算来到学院…
I never got a reply. And finally, he comes to the college.
于是我把握机会去找他
So I went to find him. My big chance.
而且就像我说过的
And it was like I said.
当时他跟院长一起在教堂里
He was here in the church, with the warden.
但他们…
Only they weren't...
不只是交谈
...just talking.
而是愤怒争执
They were arguing. They were angry.
为了“最后的审判”
About The Doom?
不是 听起来不只是这样 而是…
No, it... it sounded like more than that.
个人的…
It was...
恩怨
personal. Bitter.
肯定不是我出现的好时机
It certainly wasn't the right time for me to pop up.
本来会是条大新闻
Could've been huge,
可以采访到高层神职人员
getting a senior cleric to talk.
为何昨天不对我们老实说
Why didn't you tell us the truth about this yesterday?
珍贵情报
Precious info.
当时还没决定该怎么运用
I was still deciding how to use it.
本来考虑或许能改为逼院长接受我采访
I was thinking it might force the warden to talk to me instead.
我想这取决于你如何定义所谓的争执
I suppose it depends on how one characterises an argument.
是吗
Does it?
确实说了几句重话
We certainly had words.
现在我深感后悔
Which I now deeply regret.
我太在意他的改革计画 感觉是在批评我的领导能力
I took it personally, his plans for reform. It felt like a criticism of my leadership.
骄傲作祟
Pride.
马修克兰普顿跟我是老同学 我们都读杜伦大学
Matthew Crampton and I were at school together and we both went up to Durham.
彼此的关系始终带着几分竞争 为了荣誉…
There'd always been a touch of rivalry in our relationship... Honours.
甚至为了女生
Girls, even.
都是往事了
A long time ago.
我们是该放下 可是…
We should have moved past it, but...
目击者说争执很激烈
Our witness says the argument was heated.
或许偶尔有吧
Perhaps. At times.
说了些什么
What was said?
我不太记得了
I hardly remember.
我指责他陶醉在能够压过我的权势
I accused him of relishing his position of power over me.
他否认了 这番话太羞辱人也太过分
He denied it. It was demeaning and unnecessary.
你们是一起离开教堂的吗
Did you leave the church together?
不是 他先离开
No, he left first.
我又待了一会 寻求上帝指引 你得明白的是…
I stayed on for a while, asked for guidance. You have to understand...
本来我们隔天就会握手言和
We would have sorted it all out the following day.
这是你最后一次见到他吗-是的
Was that the last time you saw him? -Yes.
没有再找他出来 请他回到教堂
You didn't seek him out again, ask him to come back to the church?
没有 我可以对上帝发誓
No. No, I swear to God.
我对上帝…
I swear...
发誓
to God.
抱歉
Sorry.
没关系
It's fine.
感谢你的许可 我应该只需要十分钟左右
Thanks for giving permission. I should only need ten minutes or so.
没关系
No problem.
昨天我注意到你没有祷告
I noticed yesterday, you didn't pray.
没有
No.
是不是很复杂
Complicated, isn't it?
我应该算是未知论者
I suppose I'm Agnostic.
天父上帝我肯定是不信的
I certainly don't believe in God the Father,
那个从天上俯视众生的大胡子男人
the big beardy man looking down from above.
事实上我更厌恶 灵性领域被男性占据的方式
In fact, I resent the way spirituality has been requisitioned by men.
我的学士论文主题就是…
I wrote my undergrad thesis on the depiction
18世纪艺术作品中被排斥的女神
of the rejected goddess in 18th-century art.
它们清楚传达了…
Graphic messages...
上帝是男性
God is male,
教会属于男性
the Church is male,
女性要认清自身地位
know your place.
你呢
You?
我从小被教育要信神
I was raised to believe.
我的父亲是诺福克一所教会的牧师
My father was a rector at a church in Norfolk.
但我这人的个性…
Ah. But I have
固执地理性
a stubbornly rational streak.
我很怀念
I miss it.
那种确定感
The certainty.
慰藉
The comfort.
我的确…
I do have...
相信人类还有很多未知的面向
...faith that we're more than we know we are.
至于所谓的…天意
But as for some sort of divine purpose...
我找不到
I can't find that.
你的工作很难
You have a difficult job.
永远有后悔的空间
Infinite room for regret.
昨晚我应该留在这里才对
I should have stayed here last night.
你认为她是遭人谋杀
You think she was murdered?
你不见得救得了她
You may not have been able to save her.
湖边开了好多 我便想到你们两个
So many of them near the lake. I thought of you both.
真的很遗憾
I'm so sorry.
如果有什么我能做的 务必告诉我
If there's anything I can do, please tell me.
谢谢你 老师
Thank you, sir.
葛雷格瑞先生送的
From Mr Gregory.