You know I want you. Stupid badge.
蒂娜宝贝 你在跟谁说话呢
Tina, honey, who are you talking to?
苔米跟我们一起住怎么样
What if Tammy stays with us?
-免了 多谢 -千万别
- No, thank you. - No. No.
这是唯一的办法
It's the only solution.
爸 告诉苔米她爸 包在我们身上了
Dad, tell Tammy's dad we've got this.
苔米 欢迎来我家
Tammy, welcome to our home.
这儿不是游轮
It's not a cruise,
但你可能也会犯点胃病
but you might catch a stomach thing.
那么苔米 给你特别准备了大份餐
So, Tammy, a big extra special helping for you,
-因为你是客人 -不要
- our guest. - Nope.
怎么了 苔米
What's the matter with it, Tammy?
大份餐和"大混♥蛋♥"押韵
It rhymes with "Schmeverything."
无意冒犯 我只是不吃家里做的食物
No offense, but I just don't eat food that's homemade.
我们给你做点别的怎么样 亲爱的
Could we get you something else, sweetie?
没关系 我叫外卖♥♥就好了
That's okay, I'll just order in.
外卖♥♥能送到这里吗
Do places deliver here,
这片区会不会太危险了
or is the neighborhood too dangerous?
这里很安全的 除了即将上演的一起大型
Oh, it's super safe except for that huge unsolved murder
谋杀悬案
that's gonna happen.
-苔米 -怎么了
- Tammy! - What?
好吧 你把所有毛巾都扔地板上了
Okay, every towel's on the floor.
担心啥 你们没热水了
Relax. You're out of hot water,
所以不会有人需要用到毛巾的
so no one's gonna need a towel.
吹头发的在哪儿
Where's the blow-dryer?
-就在那 -我问的是
- Right there. - I was asking
吹头发的人 不是吹风机
for the person, not the thing.
你妈妈还帮你吹头发吗
Oh, your mom blow-dries your hair?
我爸不在的时候才会
Only when my dad's out of town.
我不要
I'm not doing it.
这全缠一起了
There are too many tangles!
用柔顺剂啊
Use the detangler!
柔顺剂是啥
What's "Detangler"?
我希望这些沙发垫够舒服了 苔米
I hope these sofa cushions are comfortable, Tammy.
你不用做这些的 蒂娜
Oh, Tina, you don't have to do that.
我只是想热情一点 发挥雷娘军精神...
Well, I'm just being generous and Thunderful, and...
你在干什么
Hey, hey, wh-what are you doing?
我觉得应该是我睡床
I assume I'm sleeping here
-你睡地上吧 -那你为什么要说
- and you're sleeping down there. - Then why'd you say,
"你不用摆沙发垫的"
"Oh, you don't have to put cushions down"?
我觉得你直接睡地上就行
I just thought you could sleep
不需要垫子
on the floor without cushions.
好吧
Okay.
苔米 你睡觉时放屁的习惯现在怎么样了
Tammy, how's your night-farting?
我没有这个习惯
I don't night-fart.
老爸
Dad.
-怎么了 吉恩 -我牙掉了
- Wh-Wh-What is it, Gene? - I lost my tooth.
那真是好消息 琳
Oh, that's good news. Lin.
不要 不止掉了 还丢了
No, no. I lost lost it.
好吧 我们镇定一下
Okay, let's be calm.
我们先探探她的态度
We'll-we'll feel her out a little.
说不定她不在乎的
Maybe she'll be cool.
怎么 怎么啦 你们想干嘛
What? What's up? What do you want?
吉恩的乳牙收集...
so, the Gene baby tooth collection...
在说我收集的那罐美丽的吉恩乳牙吗
Oh, you mean my perfect little Gene mouth in a jar?
有时候我会对着它讲话
Sometimes I talk to it.
如果我把它埋在树林里
And if I bury it in the woods,
我打赌会有小男孩长出来的
I bet a little boy would come up.
-乳牙怎么了 -没事 -我忘记了
- What about it? - Nothing. - I forget.
我出来透透气
Hi, I'm just taking a breather.
远离臭屁 纵情呼吸
From farts. To breathe.
哎 我们要怎么熬过和苔米共度的这一周啊
Yeah. How are we gonna get through this Tammy week?
-喝酒 -酒精不能解决问题 大小姐
- Drink? - Alcohol does not solve problems, Miss Missy.
只会让它们暂时消失
It just makes them go away.
大家别这样 我们能行的
Guys, come on. We can do this.
只剩四天了
It's only four more days.
这是呕吐物吗 恶心
Is this barf? Barf.
我的节目开始了
My show's on.
你的吹头技术为什么这么烂
Why are you so bad at this?
我还以为我越吹越好了
I thought I was getting better!
-只剩三天半了 -不行 受够了
- It's only three and a half more days. - No, enough.
我们要开个"苔米"会
We're gonna have a little Tammy-vention.
苔米 你能过来一下吗
Tammy, can you come out here, please?
干嘛都这么盯着我看
Okay, everyone stare at me.
你戴眼镜的吗
You wear glasses?
不 我戴隐形眼镜 但用完了
No, I wear contacts, which I am out of.
所以只能戴这个
So I had to put these on,
沦落的和蒂娜一样
and now my face is totally Tina-ed!
徽章 徽章 徽章 徽章
Badge, badge, badge, badge.
-苔米 我们得谈谈 -没事
- Tammy, we need to talk. - It's okay.
-我知道你们这是怎么了 -那就好
- I think I know what this is about. - Oh, good.
更礼貌一点 要感恩 多帮点忙
Being more polite and grateful and helpful.
我知道你们觉得自己已经尽力了
I know you guys think you're doing your best,
但你们还可以同时朝着这三方面再努力努力
but you could work on all three of these things.
我的天
Oh, my God.
苔米 我们这里不是酒店
Tammy, we're not a hotel.
对 我们这也不是餐馆
Yeah, and we're not a restaurant.
-没错 - 我们家确实是餐馆
- Right. - Actually, we are a restaurant.
但不是一家好餐馆
But not a good one.
对 我是说 重点是
Right. I-I mean, the point is,
苔米 在我们家 孩子要帮忙干活
Tammy, in our house, kids help out.
我们觉得你也该参与进来
And we think you might kind of appreciate other people
以示对这里的人和事的感谢
and things, if you pitched in a little.
简单来说 请干点活儿
You know, work.
活儿
Work?
在哪干活
Like, where?
我觉得你会喜欢在这里工作的
So I think you'll like working here.
-我的同事都很有趣 -我妈就是撩人精
- My coworkers are pretty fun. - Mom's the office flirt.
她在圣诞节派对上的确挺惹眼
She does get a little grabby at the Christmas party.
是的
That's true.
这一切都不是真的
This isn't happening.
我很不想在你上班第一天麻烦你 但是
I hate to haze you on your first day but,
能帮我递下那个番茄酱吗
mind passing me that ketchup?
-什么 -就是那瓶红色的
- What? - It's the red bottle right there.
-抱歉 我只是... -就在你手边
- I'm sorry, I'm just not... - Right-right by your hand.
抱歉 你能再说一遍吗
Sorry. Okay. Actually, if you could start over.
就...你可能都已经碰到了
Right... You may even be touching it.
-只需要动动你的手指... -我..
- Just put your fing...- I just...
-就在你手后 -我 我不...
- right behind... - I... I don't...
就在...你的...手边
You just... you're... you're right by it.
-我 -算了 我这儿有芥末酱
- I... - You know, I got mustard here.
-我就...用这个好了 -我只是...
- I'm g-gonna... I'm gonna do that. - I'm just...
好 我要去休息一下
Yeah, I'm gonna go on break.
什么 苔米 你还什么事都没干呢
What? Tammy, you haven't done anything yet.
我的春假
This isn't the spring break
不该是这样的
I was supposed to be having.
我本来要在船上亲吻"别镇男"的
I was supposed to be kissing BFOTs on a boat.
结果现在我头发一团糟 还要戴眼镜
Now I've got bad hair and glasses.
该死 苔米 振作一点
Damn it, Tammy, get it together.
你才坚持了两分钟
You've lasted two minutes.
这就是我的生活
This is my life.
嘿嘿嘿 餐厅女孩
Hey, hey, hey, restaurant girl.
别哭 怎么啦
Don't cry. What's wrong?
-我只是想休息一下 -但是...
- I just wanted to take a break. - But...
可怜的哭哭脸 给你手帕
You poor dirty-faced thing. Here's a handkerchief.
我随身带着以防遇见伤心的人类 或有鼻屎
I carry one in case I run into sad humans. Or boogers.
-你是谁 -你是谁
- Who are you? - Who are you?
我是布雷特 我来取我点的餐
I'm Brett, I'm picking up an order.
哦 马上就来
Oh, that's coming right up.
你是不是点了一份"爷爷餐"
Did you order one "Grandpa style"?
我不知道那是什么
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