保佑哈特

他们最后多半会把钱又拿给我们
they'd probably just turn around and give it right back to us.
这倒是 这样相当于省去了中间人
That's true. We would just be eliminating the middleman.
我们可以好好改善这里
And we could really fix things up around here.
而且这些钱可以存进
And all this cashola sure would look good
维奥莱的艺术学院基金
in Violet's art school fund.
天 还有张♥林♥肯[五美元]
Oh, my God, there's a Lincoln in here!
如果站[一]队这么能赚钱
If taking a side pays this well,
那两边都站就能赚双倍的钱
taking both sides would pay double well.
欢迎来到最后的晚餐
Welcome to The Last Supper.
你想坐在撑雕塑区
Would you like to sit in the pro-statue
还是反雕塑区
or anti-statue section?
历史 那雕塑2002年才有的
History? That statue wasn't put up till 2002!
我有些胸罩的历史都比它悠久
I've got bras that are more historical than that.
他们拆掉我们的雕塑
First they knock down our statues.
接下来还会怎样
Wh-Where does it end?
很快他们就会禁止电视里的卡♥通♥人物抽烟了
Pretty soon they won't let cartoon characters smoke on TV.
说得太对了
Ain't that the truth.
*我要付账单 我家是租♥房♥♥*
* I got bills to pay and my home's a rental *
*我在处理一个纪念碑式的问题*
* Dealing with a problem that's monumental *
*想做面包 就得两边都揉*
* Got to knead both sides if you want to make some bread *
*吞下你的意见*
* So take your opinions and stuff 'em down *
*印刷保险杠贴纸拿去卖♥♥*
* Print bumper stickers to sell in town *
*有钱赚为何还要站队*
* Why take a stand when you can take the cash instead? *
*从4点工作到10点*
* Working 4:00 to 10:00 *
*让两边都与中间势不两立*
* Turning both sides against the middle *
*从4点工作到10点*
* Working 4:00 to 10:00 *
*谁在乎虚不虚伪*
* Who cares if it's hypocritical *
*从4点工作到10点*
* Working 4:00 to 10:00 *
*晚班从未如此心里有鬼*
* Late shift never felt so shifty *
*从4点工作到10点*
* Working 4:00 to 10:00 *
*但是有钱才是王道*
* But the cash is sort of nifty! *
-61, 62.
-太棒了 -什么
- It's just so great. - What?
为了钱 你完全
Just how you're totally compromising
不顾节操 说一堆
your moral integrity and saying a bunch of stuff
你自己都不信的话
you don't believe just to make money.
又来了
Oh, here we go.
讲真 我很嫉妒 真的
Seriously, I'm jealous! I really am!
但然后我又想 换做是我我会怎么做
But then I think, what would I do?
回答是"天" 不会这样
And the answer is, "Ooh, boy." Not that.
你不用挖苦我
Okay, y-you don't have to be smart about it.
做正确的事有时很伤人
Doing the right thing sometimes hurts.
特别伤
Hurts so good.
就像约翰·麦文盖博的那首歌♥
Just like the John Cougar Mellencamp song.
-我喜欢那首歌♥ -我知道 你也应该喜欢
- I love that song. - I know you do, and you should.
他悟出了道理
The Cougs was really onto something.
走捷径不总是最好的
Taking the easy way out isn't always the best thing to do.
别说了 我已经够内疚了
Stop. I already feel guilty enough.
我不是想让你内疚 疯狂吧
I'm not trying to make you feel guilty. Go nuts!
但是不是有点怪
But it is a little weird
你买♥♥了那个600支的床单
that you bought those 600 thread count sheets
但是晚上仍然无法入睡
and still can't sleep at night.
好奇是什么原因
Wonder what that's about.
好了 耶稣 我懂的
Okay, Jesus. I get it.
是吗
Do you?
回到床单的话题
So... back to the sheets.
感觉如何
What do those suckers feel like?
因为我这衣服 20支的
Because this-- 20 count.
以前是用来装谷物的
It used to hold grain.
告诉我
Tell me, y'all,
有参议员夫人吗
is there a Mrs. Senator?
外婆
Gram?
别再你外婆幻想
Don't sneak up on your grandmother
生活本可以是什么样的时候打搅她
when she's thinking about what could have been!
我们本想在你不这么激动的时候
Well, we were hoping for a less emotionally-charged moment
告诉你这个 不过
to tell you this, but...
我们找到了玛琼恩的地址 我们需要你带我们去
We found Marjune's address, and we need you to take us there.
不可能 我为什么要去见那个
Hell, no. Why would I want to go and meet the woman
拥有了一切我未曾拥有的女人
who got everything I didn't?
因为我们跟你说了 外婆
Because we told you, Gram!
这会像《灰色花♥园♥》那样
It's gonna be a Grey Gardens situation.
保证很凄惨
Guaranteed sadness.
对你来说可以宣泄情绪
It'll be cathartic for you.
玛琼恩·卡尔佩珀是隐士
Marjune Culpepper is a recluse.
一个可悲守寡的隐士
A sad, widowed recluse.
我准备了一个老处♥女♥恐怖秀的介绍
I prepared a presentation of the spinster-esque horrors
你将有可能看到
you can expect to see.
比如 一只没有穿过的婴儿鞋
Like... A single, unworn baby shoe
里面爬出了一条蜈蚣
with a centipede crawling out of it.
玛琼恩给一家
Marjune serving high tea
厌世的浣熊倒高茶
to a family of world-weary raccoons.
然后在下午三点小睡一会儿
Followed by a mid-afternoon widow's nap
抱着她死去勤杂工的完好骨架
where she spoons the fully-intact skeleton of her dead handyman.
这还只是她变♥态♥生活的冰山一角
And that's just the tip of the creep-berg.
也许去看看那个拜金女的
Maybe it would be kind of nice to see the lonely hole
寂寞生活是个不错的选择
that gold digger dug herself into.
-太棒了 -耶
- Yes! - Yay!
但我对天发誓
But hand to God,
如果她没有用飞盘装金枪鱼沙拉
if she's not eating tuna salad off a Frisbee plate
穿纸巾盒做的鞋
and wearing tissue-box shoes,
你们是要付出代价的
there is gonna be hell to pay, y'all.
大家晚上好 安静
Good evening, everyone. Settle down.
拜托请安静
Please. Settle down.
谢谢你们今晚前来
Thank you all for coming tonight.
我召集本次紧急会议
I called this emergency meeting
好让我们有一个安全空间
so we could have a safe place
来解决这个雕塑问题
to try to work through this statue problem.
看看我
Look at me!
我就是雕塑 宝贝们
I'm the statue, babies!
-滚出 兰迪 -不 兰迪
- Get out of here, Randy. - No, Randy.
拜托别闹 今晚不行
No, please. Not tonight.
可是感觉像是嘉年华啊 宝贝们
But it's a carnival atmosphere, babies.
-兰迪 -滚出去 兰迪
- Randy! - Get out of here, Randy!
兰迪 你不能在这儿喷火 我求你了
Randy, you cannot do fire blowing in here. I'm begging you.
请坐下
Please, sit down.
我很有信心 我们今晚
Now, I feel confident that we are gonna be able
可以和平解决这个雕塑问题
to solve this statue issue peacefully tonight.
那雕塑得保留
That statue needs to stay the hell up.
要我说 就该在那上面放更多烟
If it were up to me, I'd put more cigarettes on that thing.
作为一个脱衣舞♥女♥
As an exotic dancer,
我整天都在吸二手烟
I inhale second-hand smoke all damn day.
即使在我休息的时候
Even when I'm on break!
-对 -我很讨厌
- Yeah! - And I hate it.
我觉得雕塑该保留
I think the statue should stay up.
谢谢
Thank you.
什么 不是吧
What? Really?
你喉咙里有个洞
You got a hole in your throat.
天啊
Oh, boy.
听上去两边支持人数差不多
Sounds like we're pretty evenly divided.
我们要怎么解决
How are we gonna settle this?
等下
H-Hold on!
我们最后的晚餐的服务员
Our waitress at The Last Supper
在雕塑问题上有很好的见解
just made some great points about the statue.
我们应该让她发言
We should let her talk.
你是说珍妮吗 对
Oh, you mean Jenny? Oh, yeah.
她在雕塑问题上有着坚定的道德立场
She has a real solid moral stance on that statue.
令人耳目一新
So refreshing.
珍妮·哈特将会打破僵局
Yeah. Jenny Hart will settle this stalemate.
对 珍妮绝不会顺其自然
Yeah, Jenny would never let sleeping dogs lie.
不 天啊 珍妮 不要
No. Lord, Jenny, no.
记得那些小费