布莱克书店（2000）

《布莱克书店》
第三季 第三集
姆妈和姆爸
您有五条新留言
You have five new messages.
那啥 曼尼 我是保罗
Yo, Manny! Paul here.
年度游艇雷鬼音乐烧烤宴要开始啦
The annual reggae barbecue on the barge is go.
重复一遍 要开始啦
Repeat, go!
带上帕姆还是山姆 管她什么名字的
Bring Pam, or Sam, whatever her name is.
留言已删除
Message deleted.
嘿 曼尼 我是理查德
Hey, Manny, it's Richard.
留言已删除
Message deleted.
曼爷
The Mannster!
留言已删除
Message deleted.
曼尼 又是我 保罗
Manny, Paul again.
不好意思 刚刚忘记说了
Listen, Sorry, I forgot to say,
千万别带那个炸毛爱尔兰佬来
please don't bring that grumpy Irish bastard.
留言已删除
Message deleted.
你上哪儿鬼混去了 这周末很忙的
You! Where have you been? It's a very busy weekend.
我缺人手
I need you here.
你自己来三班倒吧
You'll be doing triple shifts.
我刚刚会朋友去了
I was going to see some friends, actually.
-有电♥话♥找我吗 -一个也没有
- Has anyone called? - No, not a soul.
最近都没有人给我打电♥话♥了 伯纳德
Nobody rings me these days, Bernard.
真是奇怪啊 是吧
Yeah. It's a mystery, isn't it?
瞧你脚蹬拖鞋到处转
What with you owning sandals
胡子里还藏着一颗鸡蛋
and having an egg in your beard.
曼尼 你猜怎么着
Hey, Manny, guess what.
我碰上保罗了 他也邀请了我
I bumped into Paul and he's invited me as well.
-邀请你干啥 -雷鬼音乐烧烤宴啊
- To what? - The reggae barbecue.
-他说给你留言了 -没有
- He said he left you a message. - No.
没人打电♥话♥
No one's called here.
看 这不是有一条留言吗
Oh, look, you've got a message.
不是 别碰 亮灯是因为电♥话♥需要加盐
No. Don't touch that. That light means the machine needs more salt.
别碰 别碰 别碰
Don't touch it. Don't touch it! Don't touch it!
曼尼
Manny.
-我是你妈妈 -上帝
- It's your mum. - Oh, God.
我们留言说周末会来看你
We left a message to say we were coming for the weekend
你没回我们电♥话♥
and you didn't ring us back
-我们就默认你同意了哦 -什么
- so we assumed it was OK. - What?
我们大约会在5:45和5:47之间到
We should get there some time between 5:45 and 5:47.
伯纳德 可以让我爸爸妈妈
Bernard, will it be all right if my mum and dad
在这儿度周末吗
stay for the weekend? Will it?
当然不可以 这还用问吗
Absolutely not, it's out of the question.
这周末会很忙 我不是和你说了吗
It's a busy weekend. I told you.
但 但是他们已经在路上了
B-b-but they're coming now!
要开好几百英里的路
They're driving now hundreds of miles!
争论朵拉阿姨在1953年
Arguing about whose fault it was that
冷落诺拉阿姨 究竟是谁的错
Auntie Dora snubbed Auntie Nora in 1953!
-我该说什么啊 -我不管
- What am I gonna say? - I don't care.
-但是他们已经... -和我有关系么
- But they-they... - It's not my problem.
尽管这是我的房♥子
It's my house though,
但我可不想让我的房♥子被
I'm not having it infected with the kind of specimens
能生产出你这怪胎的病毒感染
capable of producing you.
伯纳德
Bernard.
借一步小谈 就一会儿
Can I have a little chat? Just for a mo.
不要
No.
-你对曼尼也太刻薄了 -我无法控制
- You are being very mean to Manny. - I can't help it.
他整个就像是一匹披着人皮的马
He looks like a horse in a man costume.
他爸妈就是来度个周末而已
It's just his mum and dad for a weekend.
为什么不能让他爸妈来看看他呢
Why can't he have them round?
你说起来倒是轻松
Yeah, well, that's easy for you to say.
到时候你在游艇上狂欢
You'll be off on the barge trying to find your booty
在烟雾弥漫中找寻猎物
in a haze of gange an' ting.
你怎么知道是在游艇上
How did you know it was on a barge?
我不 我不 我不知道
I didn't. I don't. I... I don't.
-我 -你这个下流坯子
- I... - You nasty man.
你把他的电♥话♥给屏蔽了
You've been screening his calls.
他不需要损友
Well, he doesn't need friends.
他们对他不好 搞得他晕头转向
They're bad for him, they make him giddy.
同意让他爸妈待这儿 不然我就告诉他
Let his mum and dad stay or I'll tell him.
我要是同意 你会留下来帮忙吗
What if I did? Would you be around to help out?
当然不会
Absolutely not.
我在船上炫 父母靠边站
I be on the boat, far away from the parent-clot.
那我就不同意
Fine, they're not staying.
好吧 好吧 我也留下
All right, all right, I'll be here.
不知道你愁什么
I don't what you're worrying about.
会很愉快的
It'll be fun.
真的吗 我要你立字为证
Really? Well, I want that in writing.
会...很...愉快的
It'll... be... fun.
签名 签名
Sign it. Sign it.
签名 弗兰·坎桑杰姆
Signed Fran Katzenjammer.
好啦 好啦 他们可以待在这儿
All right, all right, they can stay.
谢谢你 伯纳德
Thanks, Bernard!
太好了 他们可以待这儿了
That's fantastic! They're staying!
他们要待在这儿了
They're staying!
我无法呼吸了
I can't breathe!
墙壁 墙壁都向我挤过来了
The walls... The walls are closing in!
-停下 别死 -上帝
- Stop it! Stop dying! - God.
-上帝啊 -只是你♥爸♥妈而已啊
- God! - It's only your parents.
苍天啊 大地啊
God! God!
他抽风了 交给我吧
He's hysterical. Leave him to me.
退后
Clear out.
镇定 镇定 镇定 镇定
Calm down! Calm down! Calm down! Calm down!
深呼吸 可以了
OK. Deep deep breaths. OK.
镇定 镇定
Calm! Calm!
这活不可能干完的 我算是打扫不完了
It can't be done, I can't clean the shop in time.
曼尼 我要传授给你一个
Manny, I'm about to pass on a secret
只有女同胞和男同志才知道的绝招
known only to women and gay men.
不用把所有地方都打扫得干干净净
You don't have to clean everything.
用块印度麻布把东西遮起来就行了
You can cover stuff with an Indian throw.
嘛哩嘛哩哄
Haja-shazam!
太聪明了 好了
Brilliant. Right...
嘛哩嘛哩 嘛哩 哄
Haja... haja-whooja!
放下 放下
Down! Down!
你会很友善的 对吧 伯纳德
You will be nice, won't you, Bernard?
-别弄了 -抱歉 我妈妈喜欢这样
- Quit that! - Sorry. My mum does that.
请问 那是去往查塔努加的火车吗*
Pardon me, boy. Is that the Chattanooga choo-choo?
29轨上 请为我微笑送行*
Track twenty-nine. Won't you give me...
别唱了
Stop singing.
抱歉 我爸总是哼
Sorry. My... my dad does that.
没事的 曼尼 你都准备好了
Everything's fine, Manny. You're all ready.
耳朵后面洗干净没有
You remember to wash behind your ears, didn't you?
洗了
Yeah.
-没有 -我开玩笑的
- No! - I'm joking.
我没准备好 不可能准备好的
Oh. I'm not ready, I'll never be ready.
几点了
What time is it?
5点46
5:46.
曼尼
Manny!
姆妈 姆爸
Moo-Ma! Moo-Pa!
堵车怎么样 没堵车吧
Th-th-the traffic? Was the traffic all right?
没有
Yes.
-路上还顺利吧 -顺利
- Did you have a good journey? - Yes.
-真好 那路上还顺利吧 -是
- Good. And was it a pleasant trip? - Yes.
那就好 那就好
Good, good, good, good.
-你们好...还好吧 -好
- So are you... are you well? - Yes.
-别紧张 -不紧张 不紧张
- Easy. - Easy! Easy! Well...
你们大概想早点走 避开高峰
I expect you'll want to beat the traffic.
见到你们太好了
It's been lovely.
谢谢你们来看我
Thank you very much for coming.
很高兴见到你们 后会有期 拜拜
It's very lovely to see you. See you soon! Bye!
-这儿很不错 -非常好
- Well, this is nice. - Very nice.
请问*