独角兽之死（2025）

片名: 独角兽之死
"您已进入利奥波德野生保护区 野生动物保护区 违法者将进监狱"
注: 因疏散(evacuating) 和打疫苗(vaccinating) 发音接近
此处讽刺女主人并不真正关心难民问题
注: 佛教术语 意指生命在死亡后到下一♥期♥生命开始前的中间存在状态
注: 塞拉俱乐部是美国著名环保主义组织
"修道院博物馆 独角兽挂毯"
注: 泛指美洲土著 多居于美国蒙大拿州和加拿大艾伯塔省
注: 由图像 文本等样本组成的视觉呈现或拼贴图 创意工作者多用它展现作品计划呈现的风格
注: 此处的"eight ball"在俚语中通常指八分之一盎司 也就是3.5克的毒品
注: 又称苦酒或必打士 是在葡萄酒或蒸馏酒中加入树皮 草根 香料及药材浸制而成的酒精饮料
注: 一种90年代初上市的减肥药 主要成分为芬弗拉明和芬特明 因严重副作用被禁
"赶紧回来"
"发送失败"
注: 指西班牙著名冒险家胡安·庞塞·德莱昂 其著名事迹是寻找不老泉
"能收到吗" "赶紧回来" "快跑"
"您正离开利奥波德野生保护区"
各位乘客 很抱歉航♥班♥延误
Sorry about the delays today, folks,
但地面控制中心通知我们
but ground control is telling me
还需要等15分钟
it's gonna be another 15 or so
才能开始安排下机流程
until we can start the deplaning process.
所以请各位坐好
So just sit tight
我们会尽快送您踏上旅程
and we'll have you on your way as soon as we can.
安全带
Seatbelts.
女士 请系好安全带
Ma'am. Ma'am. Seatbelt.
不好意思...
Excuse me
请大家在飞机抵达登机口前坐好
Please stay seated until we're at the gate.
搞什么啊
Ow! What the fuck?
抱歉 我得捡下这个
Sorry. No, I had to grab--
你在我肩上睡着了 -我♥干♥嘛那样
You fell asleep on me. -Why would I do that?
飞机什么时候降落的
When did we land?
又是我 各位
Me again, folks.
我刚得到通知 这里停机坪上的登机梯
I'm now being told that the stairway they've got
并不适用我们这架飞机
on the tarmac here doesn't actually fit our aircraft.
所以等我们一弄清具体原由
So we'll get you on the ground
就会送大家安全着陆
as soon as we figure out what that means.
噢
Oh...
我感觉自己被封印在这了
I think I'm frozen here
因为导航一直在说只要6分钟
because it's been saying six minutes.
我知道离得不远 可是...
I know we're close but--
喂
Hello?
能听见吗 信♥号♥♥断了吗 喂
Can you hear me? Did I lose you? Hello?
喂
Hello?
噢 不 导航系统也崩溃了
Oh, no. Navigation crashed too.
上帝 怎么回事
God, what the--
嘿 你的手♥机♥能...
Hey, does your phone--
我一点信♥号♥♥都没 所以没法...
I don't have any reception. I can't--
如果你都没信♥号♥♥ 我怎么会有
Well, if you don't have service, why would I?
噢 等等 知道吗
Oh, uh, wait. You know what? I...
我之前用邮件发过方位
I have emailed directions.
能把窗户合上吗
Can you put your window up?
花粉简直要我的命
The pollen is killing me.
谢谢
Thank you.
嘿 听着 我只想说
So, hey, look, I just wanna say,
再次多谢你
you know, thanks again for...
你懂的 愿意一起来
you know, being here.
别抠了
Stop picking.
嘿 别抠 快住手
Hey, stop picking. Come on. Don't.
你刚刚是在用手弹我吗
Did you just try to flick me?
行了 没必要这么紧张
Come on. There's no reason to be nervous.
你是来这里享受的
You're here to enjoy yourself.
那绝不是我来这的理由
That's definitely not... why I'm here.
是啊 但你仍然可以享受 对吗
Yeah. But you still can, right?
亲近亲近大自然
Huh? Take in some nature,
也许还能陪我一起越野跑
maybe join me on a trail run?
不陪也行
Or not.
不过那可是你的损失
But it's your loss.
遥远的北部山脉
The mountains this far north,
是真正原始 未被人类开♥发♥过的秘境
pristine. Truly. Untouched by man.
听着 我知道你不想来
Look, I get you don't wanna be here
但是奥德尔 整个利奥波德家族
but Odell, the Leopolds,
他们都很重视家庭
they have a big thing about family
而且他们认为咱们父女二人
and they just assume that you and I
关系十分亲密
are particularly close
因为发生的一切 你懂的
because of everything that, you know,
因为我们经历的所有事
'cause of everything that's happened to us.
因为我们经历的所有事?
Because of everything that's happened to us?
是的
Yeah.
还是说只是在特指那件事
Or are you just talking about the one thing?
不好意思 我没心情充当你和你老板
Look, I'm sorry. I just don't feel like being a pity prop
聊起单亲爸爸话题时 -噢 拜托
for the single dad thing... -Oh, come on. That's...
用来卖♥♥惨的道具 就这样
...that you've got going on with your bosses. That's all.
不 我们不是为了这个
No. That's not what this is about.
不 我们可以成功
No. We can-- We can own it though.
我是说咱们们真的可以完全博取他们的同情
I mean, we could really milk them for their sympathy.
我可以装瘸
I could fake a limp.
没准我还可以准备一段关于我妈的感人独白
Maybe I could prepare a, a weepy monologue about Mom.
但我不知道你是否得帮我打份草稿
But I don't know, you probably would have to give notes on it
另外我们也需要时间排练一下
and we need some more time for that.
行了 不管你有什么不满
Okay. That's it. Whatever this is,
趁咱们没到之前赶紧一吐为快
just get it out of your system before we get there.
你是说我个性很坏吗
Are you talking about my personality?
没问题 等他们在餐桌上大肆
Fine. I will sit there and smile
计划如何哄抬价格 压榨百姓时
while they plan their predatory price
我会乖乖坐好保持微笑的
gouging at the dinner table.
那帮人的日常工作远不止药品价格
Their day-to-day is so far above drug pricing.
他们还关心许多事物
And they care about a lot of things,
不仅仅是制药业
not just pharmaceuticals.
这里整个自然保护区都是靠他们捐助
I mean, this entire nature preserve was donated by them.
是啊 但你知道慈善不过就是
Yeah, but you know that philanthropy is just--
为了帮这帮寡头漂白名声
It's reputation laundering for the oligarchy.
是啊 好吧
Yeah. Okay. All right.
也许在艺术学院是这样
Maybe on the arts quad,
但是在现实世界 你必须学会妥协
but in the real world, you have to compromise.
等我一旦被任命为代理人并在董事会席位
Once I'm named proxy and I sit on this board
坐上五六年
for five, six years,
最多十年
ten tops,
我就能赚到足够多的钱 确保我们无论遭遇什么
then I will earn enough to make sure that we're okay
都可以高枕无忧 好吗
no matter what hits us, alright?
好
Right.
奥德尔 -我是格里芬
Uh. Odell. -It's Griffin.
利奥波德先生已经等了你一个小时了
Mr. Leopold was expecting you over an hour ago.
什么 你没收到我的短♥信♥吗
What? Didn't you get my texts?
没有 -上帝 国际漫游
No. -Oh God, roaming.
不
Um, no,
麻烦转告他 我们随时就到
let him know that we will literally be there any minute.
艾略特 你在哪里
Elliot, where are you?
是我 很抱歉 利奥波德先生
Oh, yes. Yeah, I'm so sorry about this, Mr. Leopold.
我们已经开了... -你需要开慢点
We-- It's been a whole... -You need to slow down.
不 我需要信♥号♥♥ 喂
No. I need service. Hello?
艾略特 你到底要开多久
Elliot, how long is this drive going to take?
喂 能听见我说话吗
Hello? Can you hear me? Can you hear me?
他声音听起来就像个机器人
He sounds like a robot
在遭受水刑 -喂
getting waterboarded? -Hello?
拿着 给他回电♥话♥
Here. Call him back.
你自己打 反正这一切都是为了你
Do it yourself. This is all for you anyway.
什么 你说啥
What? What are you talking...
天哪 用纸巾擦一下 真恶心
Oh, my God! Use a tissue. That's disgusting.
你还好吗 你还好吗
Are you okay? Are you okay?
你就不能好好看路吗
You couldn't watch the fucking road?
没事 没事 我们都没受伤
Uh... It's okay. It's okay. We're okay.
我买♥♥了事故保险 所以...
I got the damage waiver. It's...
那他妈是什么东西
What the fuck was that?
它好像并没死
I don't think it's dead.
在这等着
Just wait there.
啥
What?
这什么
What?
这东西 我是说...
What, uh, I mean, uh...
它很痛苦