神啊
Lord
我们会受伤
We will be hurt
但我们会没事
But we'll be okay
神啊
Lord
生活会走运
Life will be blessed
不能违抗大块头领主——大块头领主
好
Okay.
想像…
Imagine...
末日才刚刚开始,对吧?
the apocalypse is just starting, right?
好,我正在想象
Okay, I'm imagining it. Okay.
但没人准备好了,对吧?
And nobody's ready, right?
因为才刚刚开始,一切都是混沌
'Cause it just happened, and its all chaos,
每个人都像在说:我们怎么办?
and everybody is like, "What do we do?
这个操蛋的世界要完了
Like, the fucking world is ending."
我们蜷在那看上去最邪恶
And we roll up in the most evil-looking,
隆隆作响,无法无天
rumbling, badass,
还喷着火的大个车上
flame-throwing muscle car.
然后我们中有个人走出来
And one of us gets out...
往我们背上绑一百磅铜和铁
with a hundred pounds of brass and steel strapped to our back...
开始乱烧一气
and just starts torching everything,
被火团团围住
completely surrounded by fire.
怎么样?
Okay?
你知道谁会出来主宰一切?
Who do you think is going to be in charge?
美杜莎女王? - 就是他♥娘♥的♥美杜莎
Mother Medusa? Motherfucking Medusa.
帅哥,我今晚真不想再出去了
Dude, I'm really not feeling like going out again tonight.
那真是最糟糕的事
That was the worst thing that could have happened.
我不知道那算不算最糟糕
I don't know if that's the worst thing that could've happened.
她恐怕会啐我一口或者踢我的蛋蛋
She could have spit on me or kicked me in the balls.
那可真爽
That would've been awesome.
我们会被揍得很惨
We could've got beat up.
好了,听着,我们今晚还出去
Okay, listen. We're going out again tonight.
说真的,我开始觉得女孩们都不再爱我了
I, for real, am starting to feel like girls don't even like me anymore.
你知道刚才我看你扛着那把大枪时
Do you know what I was thinking earlier when I was looking into your eyes...
在想什么?
when you were holding that big gun by me?
啥?
What?
哥们儿,你让我想起了大块头领主
Dude, you harsh reminded me of Lord Humungous.
不,我是认真的,真酷毙了
No, I'm serious. It was awesome.
我是那个养鸟人 ,太牛逼了
And I was the Birdman. It was sweet.
听着,我们今晚出去
Okay, listen. We're going out tonight,
只要你看准了个人
and if I even catch you looking at someone...
我不管是男是女,你都要瞄上他们
I don't care if it's a fucking guy... you're gonna hit on them.
把他们拉上车,拐回家
You're gonna pick them up, you're gonna take them home,
我会一直陪着你
and I am gonna be right by your side the whole time.
一直
Like, the whole time.
好吧 - 直到最后一幕
Okay. Until the finishing act.
好吗?
All right.
确定不需要那个水槽?
So we're sure we don't need that tank?
对,好了
Yeah. All right.
你担心它会弹回来吗
You worried about ricochet?
哥们儿,你手上有支12口径双管小猎枪
Dude, you're holding a 12-gauge, double-barrel, sawed-off shotgun.
绝对没事 - 好嘞
We're gonna be fine. All right. Okay.
等等
Wait.
完成了,现在换成柴油
That's settled then. We're switching to diesel.
丙烷是为娘们儿准备的 - 丙烷是为娘们儿准备的
Propane is for pussies. Propane is for pussies.
来吧,该准备了,哥们儿
Come on. It's time to get ready, dude.
女士们先生们
Ladies and gentlemen,
打扰你们几分钟
if I could have your attention for a couple moments.
我叫约翰·哈克,正事该开始了
My name is John Huck, and it is time for the main event.
哦也!
Oh, yeah!
哇哦!
Whoo!
看看这些漂亮的小…
Take a look at these nice little...
蟋蟀!
crickets!
好了,喂…灯光呢?
All right. Hey... Where's my spotlight?
诶,好,谢了
Hello. All right. Thank you.
现在我需要两个蠢蛋上来…
Now what I need are two dumb-asses to come up here...
搞一场吃蟋蟀大赛…
and compete in a cricket-eating contest...
奖品是这张某垃圾饭馆的50块礼券
for this $50 gift certificate to some shitty restaurant.
嘿小约翰!搞麽事?
Hey, Johnny! What's up?
你就是那个米莉婊♥子♥?
Is that fucking Milly?
不就吃些臭虫么,没什么大不了的
I'll eat some bugs. What's the big deal?
有人来挑战这位
Okay. Anybody here have what it takes...
呃…无知少女
to, uh, beat this innocent little girl?
搞什么? - 有什么搞的?
What's up? What is up?
我来对付那个小乖女 - 好
I'll take on that little daddy's girl. Okay.
哦该死的 - 听起来像是挑衅
Oh, damn. That sounds like a threat to me, right?
太好了,各位,我们有场比赛看了
All right, everybody. We got a match! Yeah!
你会惨败
You're gonna get your ass kicked.
这是你干过最牛的事
Dude, I think that was the sweetest thing I've ever seen you do.
我觉得这是我♥干♥过最二的事
I think that was the stupidest thing I've ever done.
拿到她电♥话♥了吗? - 去你的
Dude, did you get her phone number? Fuck you.
嘿,小伙子们
Hey, guys.
天哪,这不是我们的坏婊♥子♥吗
Oh, my God, if it isn't the criminal bitch...
竟然让我的铁哥们儿丢了面子
who stole all the glory from my main man.
是我♥干♥的 - 咋了?坐,坐
Hey, it's what I do. - What's up? Have a seat.
好 - 嗨
All right. Oh. Hey.
嗨
Hey.
刚刚你的表现真精彩
That was quite the show you put on up there.
谢谢 - 我看到个女孩把那堆恶心的垃圾塞进嘴里
Aw, thank you. Yeah, it's been, like, 12 hours...
一时觉得这像是好久前的事了
since I've seen a girl put that much gross shit in her mouth.
哇哦,说得很逗人嘛
Oh, wow. Quite the charmer.
抱歉,呃,我是艾登
I'm sorry. Um, I'm Aiden.
米莉 - 你们要知道
Milly. Just to let you guys know,
这可能是我有生见过的 为50块钱做出的最蠢的事
that's probably the dumbest fucking thing I've seen anybody do for $50 in my life.
你觉得这蠢?你们上周真该来
Oh, you think that's dumb? You guys should've been here last week.
我们上周在啊 - 你们在吗?
What? We were here last week! You were here?
对啊,有个诡异的老家伙从人堆里出来
Yeah. When the creepy old guy came out of the crowd.
不是吧?那家伙什么毛病?
No shit! What was wrong with that guy?
你真就让他们烧你?
So you were actually gonna let them set you on fire?
我可以偷偷告诉你
I'm gonna let you in on a little secret.
他们是烧我了 - 不是吧!
They did set me on fire. - What?
没错! - 我们在这里待了几小时
Yes! - We stayed after hours.
我错过了? - 嗯哪
And I missed it? Yup.
哦天哪,我那天晚上一直想
Oh, my God. That was all I wanted that night...
看看那鬼玩意儿
was to fucking see that shit.
看来你交了些朋友
Looks like you made some friends. Yeah!
小心这些男孩,他们可坏着呢
Watch out for these boys. They're bad news.
他们得小心我们才是
Oh, they have to watch out for us.
我们现在需要…
Okay. We're gonna need...
三壶啤酒和一巡烈酒
three pitchers of beer and a round of shots.
天哪,不要 - 不行?
Oh, my God. No. What?
好吧,要威士忌,等等,要…要…
Okay. Make it whiskey. Wait. Right? Right?
喂! - 每人两杯威士忌
Joe! Two shots of whiskey each.
你有扑克牌吗?
And do you have a deck of playing cards?
在这里给你扑克是违法的
You know, it's illegal for me to give you cards in here.
其实我知道 - 好
Actually, I did know that. Good.
嘿,伙计 - 嘿
Hey, there, buddy. Hey.
你以为能从我眼皮底下偷偷溜走?
Did you think you could just sneak away and I wouldn't notice?
我可没溜,只是来给你拿喝的
I wasn't sneaking away. I was just getting you your drink.
真的? - 真的
Really? Yes.
不过酒保就是不看我
But I'm very bad at getting bartenders' attention.
没事,我们一起等 - 好,很好
That's okay. We can do it together. Okay. Cool.
你的朋友…真有点浑
So your friend— He's a little bit of a bastard.
你说艾登? - 好,喝,喝
What, Aiden? Ah! Ohh! Go!
不,他只是有点疯
Mmm. No. He's just crazy.
一旦你和他熟了就会发现他人超好
Once you get to know him, he's, like, the sweetest dude you'll ever know.
我相信,嘿 - 我刚还在想你什么时候来找我
I'm sure. Hey. I was wondering when you were gonna come see me.
抱歉,最近忙,你还好吗?
Sorry. Been busy. How you doing?
好,你懂得,一般般 - 嗯,听出来了
Good. You know, just the usual. Yeah, I hear you.
你点些什么? - 呃
So what can I get for you? Um,
来两份啤酒,两杯威士忌
I'm gonna get two beers and two shots of whiskey.
没问题
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