Monica: Ross, when's this comet thing start?
罗斯，这个慧星什么时候会来？
Ross: Well, technically it seven billion years ago…
是这样的，理论上来说，七百万年前。
All: Oh no! Oh no!
哦，不！哦，不！
Ross: Okay! Okay! Fine, I'll stop! No teaching, okay? We'll just watch the pretty light streaking across the sky. Okay? Who's official name is Bapstein-King.
好吧，好吧，我不说了，不上课好吧，我们就来看那道从天空中划过的美丽的光芒，它的学名叫作巴布斯坦王。
All: Okay! Okay!
好了！好了！
Phoebe: There it is! Oh, look at that! Isn't Mother Nature amazing?
在那儿，看那，你看大自然多神奇啊！
Chandler: That's a plane!
那是飞机。
Phoebe: Well, all right. 1700 bags of peanuts flying that high, that's pretty amazing too.
好吧，1700袋花生能飞那么高也挺神奇的。
Tag: Hey, I wonder if you can see my apartment from up here.
嘿，想飞机上能不能看到我家。
Rachel: No. No, you can't.
不，不能，看不到。
Tag: Why?
为什么？
Rachel: Oh, I don't know.
我不知道。
Ross: Man, look at all those stars! Infinite space. It really, really makes you wonder, doesn't it?
各位，看看那些星星吧！无限的宇宙实在让人感到惊奇，对吧？
Joey: You know what else makes you wonder?
你知道还有什么让人惊奇的吗？
Ross: Huh?
哈？
Joey: Check out the rack on this chick!
看看那个妞的胸部！
Monica: Okay, we've been out here for two hours and we haven't seen any stupid comets. Can we go now? I mean, Chandler's getting chilly.
我们已经在外面两个小时了，还没看到那愚蠢的彗星，我们能走了吗？说，钱德勒冻死了。
Chandler: No, I'm not!
不，我没有。
Joey: Then why are you wearing Monica's jacket?
那你为什么穿着莫妮卡的外套？
Chandler: Because it's flattering! Come on Monica! Come on Monica!
因为好看，走吧，莫妮卡，走吧，莫妮卡。
Rachel: Yeah actually, I think we're gonna take off too. We rented a movie.
我想我们也得走了。我们租了一部带子。
Phoebe: Oh! I won't say, 'no' to a movie!
哦！我不会拒绝一部片子的。
Rachel: Uh Pheebs, we just actually kinda wanted to be alone.
菲比，其实我们想单独待在一起。
Phoebe: Shh! Get me out of here.
嘘！快带我走。
Rachel: OK.
好。
Joey: Ross!
罗斯！
Ross: What?
怎么了？
Joey: Come here, check this out!
过来看看这个！
Ross: What? Is it the comet?
是什么？慧星吗？
Joey: No! No. Look, there's a bug stuck in tar right here.
不！不 你看这儿有只虫子陷进沥青。
Ross: Joey come, I can't believe, I bring you here to see the Bapstein-King comet, one of nature's most spectacular phenomenon, and all you care about are bugs stuck in tar and some woman!
乔伊，我真不敢相信，我带你来这是为了看巴布斯坦王，大自然最美妙的奇观之一，可你关心的却是陷在沥青里的虫子还有女人！
Joey: You know, there's two women dude.
你知道，有两个女人，老兄。
Ross: Show me where?
在哪里？
Joey: Right up here.
在那里。
Ross: Joey where's the pipe that was holding the door open?
乔伊，我们拿来顶住门的管子呢？
Joey: I don't know!
我不知道。
Joey: Yeah, I do.
我知道。
Ross: Joey!
乔伊！
Joey: What? ! All right, Hey! Don't look at me! You're the one who wanted to come up and look for some stupid Burger King comet!
怎么了，好吧，嘿！别看着我，是你非要上来看什么愚蠢的汉堡王彗星的好吗！
Ross: It's called the Bapstein-King comet, okay? Hey! Hey! Bapstein was a very well respected astronomer!
那是巴布斯坦王慧星，好吗？巴布斯坦是一位很受尊敬的太空人！不
Joey: Oh no! No! No!
哦！不不不！
Chandler: Monica!
莫妮卡！
Monica: She's sleeping.
她睡着了。
Chandler: I know, just quick-quick question, quick question. Which one was Deep Impact and which one was Armageddon?
我知道，就问一个简单的问题。《慧星撞地球》是哪部《世界末日》又是哪部？
Monica: Deep Impact was the one with Robert Duval, Armageddon is what's going to happen to you if you wake me up.
《慧星撞地球》是有罗伯特·杜瓦那部。如果你再叫醒我就会知道什么叫做世界末日了。
Chandler: Sorry, I just…can't sleep. Ooh! Where is that book that you are reading with the two women who were ice-skating and wearing, Ooh! Where is that book that you are reading with the two women who were ice-skating and wearing, Because every time I look at that cover I'm like…
对不起，我只是睡不着。你看的那本书呢？封面上两个帽子上插花的滑冰女人，每次我看到那个封面，我都会
Monica: It is in the living room where there is also a light! And no one will kick you in the shin.
在客厅里，那儿也有灯光而且没人会踢你的小腿！
Chandler: What? !Ow!
什么？！啊！
Phoebe: Please don't be a space ship. Please don't be a space ship.
拜托请别是太空飞船，拜托请别是太空飞船。
Phoebe: Oh thank God!
感谢上帝。
Phoebe: How could you be beeping? ! I just disconnected you! I took out your battery! How can… Don't interrupt me!
你怎么可能还在哗？！我不是把你卸下来了吗！我把电池取出来了！你怎么…别打断我！
Ross: Rachel! ! Monica! !
瑞秋！莫妮卡！
Joey: Come on!
来！
Ross: I can't believe this!
真不敢相信！
Joey: All right well, You know…I guess we know what we have to do to get down.
好吧，我大概知道我们应该怎么下去了。
Ross: Yeah, I guess we don't have a choice. Help us! Please help us! We're stuck up on the roof and we can't get down!
我想我们也别无选择了。救救我们！请救救我们！我们被困在屋顶下不去了！
Joey: Ross. I was thinking we could just go down the fire escape.
罗斯。我是说我们可以顺着消防梯下去。
Ross: I know, I wasn't finished. But don't worry! We're gonna go down the fire escape!
我知道，我还没说完。但是不用担心，我们可以顺着消防梯下去！
Chandler: Shh!
嘘！
Chandler: I'm sorry, I thought maybe I'd make some warm milk and it would help me sleep.
对不起，我想弄些热牛奶可以帮助我入睡。
Monica: With a wok? I thought you were going to read my boring book to put you asleep.
用炒锅？我以为你想看那本无聊的书来催眠。
Chandler: It got interesting! Damn you Oprah!
那书还挺有趣的。可恶的欧普拉！
Monica: Here, let me make the milk, I'm up anyway.
来吧，我来替你热牛奶，反正我已经起来了。
Chandler: Hey, You know what we can do? You know, now that we are up? We can just like talk to each other all night long, You know like we did when we were first going out. It'd be fun!
既然我们已经起来了，你知道可以做什么吗？我们可以秉烛夜谈。像我们第一次约会时那样，会很有趣的。
Monica: Okay that does sound like fun.
好吧，听起来是很有意思。
Chandler: So how bummed were you when the second sister died huh?
读到二姐死的时候真让人难过，对吧？
Monica: The second sister dies? !
二姐死了？！
Chandler: No. No. I was talking about the book I was reading.
没有。没有，我是在说我看的那本书。
Monica: The second sister dies in Archie and Jughead Double Digest?
《阿契漫画合集》里的二姐死了？
Chandler: That's correct.
对。
Rachel: You wanna go in the bedroom? It's a little more comfortable.
想到卧室里去吗？那里舒服一点。
Tag: Sure.
当然。
Rachel: Okay. Oh wait! Umm, did you send those contracts to Milan?
哦，等等！你把那些合同寄到米兰去了吗？
Tag: This is your idea of sexy talk?
这是你调情的方式吗？
Rachel: No seriously, You know the contracts I gave you, did you overnight them?
不，说真的。你知道，我交给你的合同，你把它们放过夜了？
Tag: What contracts?
什么合同？
Rachel: Okay please tell me that this is just one of your jokes that you do that I don't get.
拜托，告诉我这是你另一个我搞不懂的笑话。
Tag: Like what?
比如说？
Rachel: You know, like the thing when you put the phone in your pants? Tag! I'm serious! This isn't funny! Those contracts absolutely had to go out today!
比如说你把电话放在短裤上，泰格！我是认真的！这一点都不好玩！这些合同今天一定得寄出去！
Tag: Rach, I'm sorry, but you didn't give me any contracts!
瑞秋，很抱歉，但是你没给过我合约。
Rachel: Yes I did! And I put a little Post-It on it that said, "Must go out today," and underlined today three times and, and then I put a little heart in the corner because I didn't want to seem to bossy.
我有，我还贴了一张即时贴，写着"今天一定要寄出"还在"今天"下面划了三道。我还在角落画了一颗心，因为我不想太颐指气使。
Tag: I'm telling you, you never gave them to me.
我说，你从来没交给我什么合同。
Rachel: You know what Tag, if we went down to the office you would see those contracts sitting on your desk.
你知道，泰格，如果我们到办公室去，你会看到合约就在你的办公桌上。
Tag: No, I would see you looking embarrassed because they are not on my desk!
不，我会看到你很窘迫，因为合约不在我办公桌上。
Rachel: Or maybe you would see me looking embarrassed because you are talking on the phone with your crotch!
也许我会，因为你用裤裆接电话，所以才看起来很窘迫。
Tag: You wanna go down to the office right now?
你想现在去办公室吗？
Rachel: No! Come on its late, we're not gonna go down to the office.
很晚了，我们别去办公室了。
Tag: Okay I understand. I wouldn't want to be proved wrong either.
我理解，我也不想被证明自己是错的。
Rachel: All right, get your coat! Oh! When did you unhook this? Nice work!
好吧，拿上你的衣服！哦！你什么时候解开的？动作真巧妙！
Joey: I won't go down any further. It's stuck.
我下不去，卡住了。
Ross: Ugh. Well, we're just gonna have to jump. Yeah. Now, we're gonna have to make sure to land to the right of that patch of ice, okay?Not hit the dumpster on the other side and uh,and try to avoid that-that weird brownish red stuff in the middle. So, when you get down there…you go up to the roof and you let me in.
好吧，我们只有跳下去。我们一定要确定着陆在那块冰的右边，好吗？不要撞到旁边的垃圾桶。试着避开中间那棕红色的奇怪东西。当你到下面以后，你去屋顶开门让我进去。
Joey: Oh whoa-whoa wait a minute! I have to do it? !
慢着，必须得我跳？！
Ross: Yeah! Oh yeah, you'll be fine! it'll be, just like bungee jumping. You know? But instead of bouncing back up you won't.
是的 你会没事的！就像蹦极一样，但你就是不会弹上来罢了。
Joey: What if I smack my head on the concrete?
要是我的头撞到水泥地了呢？
Ross: Well, I'm gonna lie to you Joey, it's a possibility.
乔伊，我不想骗你，是有这个可能的。
Joey: I don't know Ross! I tell you what, let's flip to see who does it, okay? You call it in the air, all right?
我不知道，罗斯，听我说，我们抛硬币决定谁跳，好吗？到空中再说你要哪一面，好吗？
Ross: Oh, all right. Tails! Can you see what it is?
好吧。反面！你看得见是正面还是反面吗？
Joey: No.
不。
Ross: Okay. Well, you be careful.
好吧，你要小心一点。
Joey: What? No! No Ross! no! Stop! I'm not jumping! Okay, look I have an audition tomorrow and I can't go if I break my leg.
罗斯，不要这样。我不跳。我明天还有试镜，如果摔断腿就不能去了。
Ross: Well I'm jumping! I have a son! Okay? He won't have a father if I die!
我也不跳，我可是有儿子的人。我死了，他就没爸了。
Joey: Well all right so, it looks like we're even!
哦，好吧，看来起我们的处境一样的！
Phoebe: Okay. So, this wire is connected to this wire which plugs into here. Okay so, to get the beeping to stop all I have to do… Well done, Pheebs. What do you want from me? !
这条线，连着这条线，插♥进这里，所以要想让它停住，就得…干得好，菲比。你想我怎么样？！
Monica: Okay, here's your milk. What do you want to talk about?
你的牛奶来了，你想谈什么？
Chandler: What? What? What?
什么？什么？什么？
Monica: Oh~Oh~ Were you sleeping sweetie? I'm sorry. Here.
你睡着了吗？甜心，对不起，给。
Tag: Okay! Feel free to look, but I'm telling you those contracts are not on this desk.
随便看，不过我告诉你，合同没在这张桌上。
Rachel: How can you possibly know? Look at this mess, Tag! I mean, this is what I'm talking about! You have to be organized! You've got newspapers! You've got magazines! You got, Oh! And who is this chippy? A little young for you Tag, but whatever.
你怎么可能知道？你看看有多乱，泰格！我告诉过你了，要有条理一点。有报纸，有杂志，这小妞是谁？对你来说太幼稚一点，随便啦。
Tag: It's my sister.
是我妹。
Rachel: Okay, very cute braces. Anyway You know what, the point is Tag, start looking because you are going to find those contracts on your desk.
真的，牙套好可爱。无所谓啦，关键在于，开始找吧！你会在你桌上找到那合同。
Tag: So when do you imagine you gave them to me? In the morning or in the afternoon?
你觉得你是什么时候给我的？上午还是下午？
Rachel: In the afternoon. Mr. Zelner came into my office after lunch. He put them on my desk, and then I put a Post-It on it that said, "Must go out today."So you just keep looking in there! All right?
下午，塞纳先生午饭后来我这里了一趟，他把合约放在我桌上，然后我贴了即时贴写着"今天一定要寄出"，请你继续找，好吗？
Tag: They're not here.
不在这里。
Rachel: Puzzler. A bit of a puzzle. Why don't you, check the copy room? maybe you left the contracts in there.
怪事，有一点点奇怪，为什么你不去复印室看看？也许你把它们落那了。
Tag: How could I have left them in the copy room?
我怎么会落在复印室？
Rachel: I don't know Tag! How can your genitals make phone calls? Okay? It's not a perfect world! Just go please.
我不知道，泰格！你的小鸡鸡怎么打电话的？好吧？那不是《完美的世界》！去吧。
Tag: Fine.
行。
Rachel: Thank you.
谢谢。
Rachel: Hello? I still don't get it.
喂？我还是不懂。
Monica: You still awake?
你还醒着吗？
Chandler: Yeah! You?
是啊，你呢？
Monica: You do know that was me who just said that right? Hey. As long as we're both up…
你知道说话的是我吧？嗨。既然我们都醒着怎样'
Chandler: Yeah? I hope you're not thinking about cleaning the living room.
我希望你不是想要打扫客厅。
Joey: Man, I'm starving! What the hell was I thinking at dinner? ! "Do you want soup or salad?" Both! Always order both!
伙计，我饿死了，晚饭的时候我都吃了些什么啊？！"要汤还是沙拉"，都要，永远都是两者都要。
Ross: You know, You know I'm looking and I don't think anyone's home here. I say we just break the window, crawl through, and You know explain later.
我刚才往里面看了一下，我想这里面没人在家，我们先打破这扇窗户爬进去，以后再向人家解释。
Joey: Yeah? Really? No one's home?
真的？没人在家？
Ross: I don't think so. Hello?
我想是的，有人吗？
Ross: So when you get in there…
你进去以后'
Phoebe: Okay, this is where you and I part ways. Noisy bitch!
好吧，我们就在这里分手，你这个吵闹的贱♥货！
Monica: What? ! What are you doing? !
怎么？！你在干什么？！
Chandler: Do you know what just happened?
你知道刚刚发生什么事吗？
Monica: Yeah. We had sex and then we fell asleep.
我们做♥爱，然后我们睡着了。
Chandler: No. We were in the middle of sex and you fell asleep.
不，我们做了一半，然后你睡着了。
Monica: No! No, that's not true. No, best time ever! Yeah, you rocked me world!
不！不，才不是。这是最棒的一次。改变了我的世界观。
Chandler: Monica?
莫妮卡？
Monica: What? !
怎么了？！
Chandler: I was giving you some of my best moves, and you missed it. So please wake up so we can do it right!
我刚用了我最好的招数，你却错过了。快起来，我们好好做一次。
Monica: Okay. Okay, I'm ready. Come on big fella!
好，我准备好了，大哥快来吧！
Chandler: Okay.
好。
Monica: Give me the good stuff.
来点精彩的。
Chandler: Yeah! No! No! No! Don't fall asleep! Okay, I am going to make you some coffee. And I probably won't spill coffee grounds all over the kitchen floor.
好，别啊，别睡啊。我去给你煮点咖啡。我应该不会把咖啡渣粉得满厨房都是。
Monica: Okay, I'm up! I'm up!
好吧，我起来了，起来了。
Rachel: Hi! I got you some coffee. To. So, do you got anything for me?
嘿，咖啡来了，给。所以，你找到我要的东西了没？
Tag: Still no luck.
还是没有。。
Rachel: Oh my God! Did you check your entire desk! Did you check all the drawers!
天哪！你检查你的桌子了吗！你是不是检查了每个抽屉？
Tag: Do you want me to check again?
要我再找一次？
Rachel: Well yeah, I wish that you would. Well, no it's not in there! How about that drawer?
我希望你这么做，没有在这里！那个抽屉呢？
Tag: Well, it's not out here. Is there any chance it could be in your office?
好吧，这儿也没有，是不是有可能在你的办公室里？
Rachel: You know, I don't know. Let me, let me check.
我不知道。我找找看。
Tag: Any luck?
运气不错吧？
Rachel: See you in my office for a minute?
你能到我办公室里来一下吗？
Tag: Yeah? You found them! You know what? I'm not even going to gloat.I'm just really relived this whole thing is over.
好的？你找到了！你知道，我不是兴高采烈，只是事情结束让我松了一口气。
Rachel: You put these on my desk!
是你放在我桌上的。
Tag: I did not!
我没有！
Rachel: Oh really? So you're saying they just slid out of your bottom drawer, crawled across the floor, then jumped on to my desk? !
是吗？所以它是从你最下面的抽屉溜出来，爬过地板，跳到我桌上来的吗？！
Tag: How did you know they were in my bottom drawer?
你怎么知道它在我最下面的抽屉里？
Rachel: I am so hot for you right now.
你真是让我欲♥火焚身啊。
Phoebe: Oh my God! How did you get back here? !
我的天！你怎么回来的？！
A Disembodied Voice: Phoebe Buffay? !
菲比·布菲？！
Phoebe: Fire alarm? Oh! Hi, officer—fireman, can I help you?
火警？噢！嗨，火警先生，有什么我能帮你的吗？
The Fireman: We found your fire alarm in the trash chute.
我们在垃圾桶里发现了你的烟雾探测器。
Phoebe: That's not mine.
不是我的。
The Fireman: Yes it is.
是你的。
Phoebe: How do you know?
你怎么知道？
The Fireman: The next time you want to dump a fire alarm in a trash chute, don't wrap it in a blanket that says, "Property of Phoebe Buffay not Monica."
下次你丢掉探测器时，别用一张上面写着"菲比·布菲财物 非莫妮卡所有"的毯子包着。
Phoebe: Okay, do you have a search warrant? Because the last time I checked this was still America!
好吧，有搜查证吗？因为上次我检查的这里还是美国！
The Fireman: Please reattach this, it's against the law to disconnect them.
请把它装回去，拆除它是违法的。
Phoebe: Fine! But please God, tell me how to stop them from going off!
好吧！但拜托请告诉我，怎么能让它停止叫唤！
The Fireman: Just press reset button under the plastic cover.
塑料盖子下面有个重设的钮，按一下。
Phoebe: There's a reset button? ! Ugh, thank you! Thank you! There's a reset button! My God! Why didn't I see that! Reset button, reset button, where is there a reset button?Oh here it is! Oh! Oh, God!
有重设按钮？！谢谢！谢谢！还有重设按钮呢！天啊！我怎么没看见，重设按钮，重设按钮。重设按钮在哪里？哦，在这儿，哦！老天！
Ross: Okay, do you have a good grip?
你抓好了吗？
Joey: Yeah!
是的！
Ross: Okay, I'm going to start climb down you now.
好吧，现在我要开始从你身上爬下去了你。
Joey: Just hurry up!
动作快点！
Ross: Okay. Now should I climb down your front so we're face to face or should I climb down your back so we're butt to face.
我是应该从你前面爬下去，这样我们脸对着脸呢，还是应该从你后面爬下去，这样你的屁♥股对着我的脸。
Joey: I think face to face.
我想还是脸对脸。
Ross: I would say that.
我想是的。
Joey: Face to face, yeah!
脸对脸，好吧！
Ross: Okay, here I go.
好，我来了。
Joey: All right.
好。
Joey: Oh my… How much do you weigh Ross? !
天啊！你有多重啊，罗斯？！
Ross: I prefer not to answer that right now, I'm still carrying a little holiday weight.
我拒绝回答。节日的幸福肥还留在我身上。
Joey: You know, when we talked about face to face, I don't think we thought it all the way through.
你知道，我们说脸对脸的时候，我们没想清楚这个流程。
Ross: So what do you want me to do?
你想怎样？
Joey: Well, just shimmy down me and drop!
赶紧顺着我向下。
Ross: Hi.
嗨。
Joey: Hi.
嗨。
Ross: Maybe I should hang and you can climb down me.
也许我应该挂着，你顺着我爬。
Joey: Yeah? Maybe we should talk about that for a little while!
是的？也许我们应该再谈谈？
Ross: It's still looks pretty far!
看起来还是很高！
Joey: It's not that far! Just drop!
不高了！跳吧！
Ross: Do not rush me!
别催我！
Joey: Ross, you should know that my pants are starting to come down and I'm not wearing any underwear!
罗斯，你要知道，我裤子快掉了，我又没穿内♥裤。
Ross: Oww! ! My ankle! I really hurt my ankle! I think I twisted it when I…Ooh, a quarter!
噢！我的脚踝！我扭到脚了！我扭到'哦！两角五分钱！
Monica: That really was some of your best work.
确实是你最好的招数啊。
Chandler: Hm-hmm, I told you! I can't believe that I've only got two hours before I call in sick for work.
告诉过你了。简直让人无法置信。在我请病假之前，只剩2小时了。
Monica: I have to be up in seven minutes.
我7分钟之后就要起床。
Chandler: Well, you're not gonna believe this, but if you have seven minutes…
你不会相信的，但是既然你还有7分钟'
Monica: Really? !
真的？！
Chandler: Do you wanna?
你想要吗？
Monica: Okay! You get the vacuum cleaner and I'll get the furniture polish!
好！你负责吸尘器，我负责给家具打蜡！